The Day Has Finally Come.....

[Aramis]

It has been almost 4 years since I, far too optimistically it seems, slotted myself into the Class of 2021. Today was my last day. Happily, it was still my choice and I wasn't forced. I imagine many have you stories of finding yourself well in arrears of your hoped for date. Life has a way of both throwing things at you and permitting you to get in your damn emotional way, doesn't it?

I am not concerned about finances. I have been running the numbers and simulations for years and we have both 25% more money and perhaps 15% less lifespan, now, than we did when we first started thinking we could make it. And we got here with my wife having retired 5 years ago. I expect it will take me some time to decompress and switch from saver to spender but the motivation (extensive travel) will provide the push.

Right now (its been 3 hours since I walked out the door for the last time - lol), I am feeling a kind of sadness that such a significant part of my life is over. I spent 40 years working, largely enjoying what I did (but not enjoying the associated deadline stress), and I have always held very tightly to the idea that a stable job I enjoyed was a very important thing and was to be treasured, and protected. It just feels so strange to have walked away, or separated myself from those long held beliefs, just hours ago.

This is not a feeling of fearing I may lose my identity without my career, I do not think I will feel diminished, or bored. I just feel like I have let something important go and I wonder how long I will feel the dissonance.

I really enjoyed much of my work but the imbalance between that pleasure and my perceptions of the time I had left time left finally became too great. It feels like the breakup of a personal relationship that I wanted and initiated, despite the sense of loss that would come from it. Did some of you feel that way? Should I expect to grieve this like a relationship that was very important but that I knew had to end because it was holding me back?

So, tomorrow looks to be an amazing spring day. I will get out and do some fun things, and start planning some chores that I and the weather have been putting off since last fall. I will probably spend too much of the day ruminating.

She was a very nice and pretty girl and we remained very close even as the years took their toll on our relationship. But I have to move on. I hope she finds someone new. I will always be grateful I was able to say goodbye on good terms.

 

[2017ish]

congrats on pulling the trigger. DW and I also both loved what we did. Objectively, perhaps too much so--leading to far more hours at work that most people devote. BUT, once we had enough assets, we gave our lengthy notices and quit on the same day in 2017. It has been amazing. We've spent FAR more waking time together in the past (nearly) 7 years than we did in the previous 34 of our marriage.

Don't look back, only look ahead!

And again, Congrats. ?

 

[Route246]

Thanks for the anecdote. I'm planning on Sept 2025 for my last day at work at this point at age 68 on my terms. After I dialed in this date a few weeks ago I am cherishing every day at work now, even though it is over a year out. The good and the bad is all good.

 

[Calico]

Congratulations!!

 

[audreyh1]

Well I tell you, I just didn’t look back. I had so much to look forward to (travel for sure). I had scheduled a major trip a week after my retirement date and that worked out very well - I was busy getting ready for the trip and then really enjoying the trip and marveling about not having to back to work when I got home.

It did take me a good six months to decompress. I didn’t push myself too hard, mostly gave myself time and tried different things. By the following year we had a whole bunch of travel lined up.

Congrats!

 

[JBTX]

It has been a bit different for me. I was laid off 10 years after my first company job, in my 30s. Felt some of the same things OP felt. Took several months off, worked another job, then they sold part of the company, so then I took time off, then did contract work. My career has had scattered breaks of a couple/few months here and there, and many years of it part time contract work.

There was good and bad to the above approach but one good was when there was a future separation, there was much less “grief” and actually a sense of relief. All of those things that I had on my plate, worrying about and responsible for were done.

I suspect much of what you feel is your sense of identity and belonging and you’ve had nothing to compare it to. Those feelings will fade in time. My suggestion for now if just keep yourself busy with anything - chores, projects, hobbies, fitness etc.

 

[Luvtoride]

Aramis, Congratulations and welcome to “the other side”. Nice write up about your emotions retiring/ leaving from a job you loved. Change is always hard but I think you will find the transition to a “everyday is Saturday “ life quite pleasant.

You will be amazed by how quickly you will fill up your days with other things to do which you will enjoy. For example, I re-activated my library card (which I’ve had from my town for over 40 years and hadn’t used in many years). Now as I see the receipt every time I take out new books it shows me how much money I’ve saved by borrowing vs buying these books on a YTD basis. And I even get to READ them now too.

I felt like Audrey described and also got right into it by traveling just about each month since I retired.

Enjoy your retirement and keep us posted as to how it’s going.

 

[street]

Yep, I can relate to the breakup. Like the song goes, She Was Always on My Mind. My career was my grade school kid dream, and I always knew what I wanted to do. So, when I got to do what I wanted to do for 38 years it was tough walking out the door.

What saved me was like others have said, I focused on my new life and never looked back. The profession I was in, and office is about a mile from my home. In 8 eight years I have been back there twice because I had to be there. I broke the love of my place of work the best way I knew how. I never looked back kept doing what I retired too.

Good Luck.

 

[REIJM]

Congrats on the retirement. I imagine that in the immediate short-term, you'll have that kind of shell-shocked feeling of not having your normal routine that you've been accustomed to for decades. But I'm hoping that feeling wears off quickly for you, and you begin to enjoy retirement.

My whole mentality is that I work in exchange for money that I use to live my current life, and save/invest for the future. As soon as my wife and I have enough money to RE, it no-longer makes sense to trade 40-50+ hours a week of our time for more money when we already have enough. We want to use that money to enjoy our time and do whatever we want to do, especially when we're still relatively young and have our health.

 

[Midpack]

It is a major change so it is a little disorienting, just give it a little time and you’ll gradually find your new normal. Once you settle in to retirement, it took me many months, your career will slowly fade from front of mind (but never entirely). I think about what my daily schedule looked like, and all I jammed into every day, and I wonder how I ever did it? Mind boggling, don’t miss it one bit.

 

[Luvtoride]

Congrats on the retirement. I imagine that in the immediate short-term, you'll have that kind of shell-shocked feeling of not having your normal routine that you've been accustomed to for decades. But I'm hoping that feeling wears off quickly for you, and you begin to enjoy retirement.

My whole mentality is that I work in exchange for money that I use to live my current life, and save/invest for the future. As soon as my wife and I have enough money to RE, it no-longer makes sense to trade 40-50+ hours a week of our time for more money when we already have enough. We want to use that money to enjoy our time and do whatever we want to do, especially when we're still relatively young and have our health.

REIJM, I’ve used that mantra for several years prior to my retirement…I think I read it here:
“Work is trading time for money…eventually, you’re trading time you will NEVER get back for money you will NEVER spend”!

 

[Qs Laptop]

Congratulations on taking the big step! I'm sure the feelings of melancholy will diminish as you transition into your new life.

 

[Romer]

Congrats on making the break! My wife recently got me to go to one of those free dinners and Financial talks. I usually say no, but her friends asked us to double date. I had forgotten how much went into planning and making sure I was ready to retire and all the years working to get there. Everyone else there was trying to figure out when they could retire and all the pressure that comes with it. Welcome to the other side of all of that!

 

[pacergal]

Welcome to retirement !
Enjoy your first morning coffee, sit back and watch the others head off to work
It will take a bit to decompress from work, most of us have gone through that. You will be amazed, though, how quickly you are able to fill up your days with things you want to do on your own time line!

 

[CaliKid]

Great post and congrats to you! I can't quite pull the plug in total myself, as I still work very part-time in my stressful job, but posts like yours are encouraging for me. You earned it so enjoy your time!

 

[Retired Expat]

It has been almost 4 years since I, far too optimistically it seems, slotted myself into the Class of 2021. Today was my last day. Happily, it was still my choice and I wasn't forced. I imagine many have you stories of finding yourself well in arrears of your hoped for date. Life has a way of both throwing things at you and permitting you to get in your damn emotional way, doesn't it?

I am not concerned about finances. I have been running the numbers and simulations for years and we have both 25% more money and perhaps 15% less lifespan, now, than we did when we first started thinking we could make it. And we got here with my wife having retired 5 years ago. I expect it will take me some time to decompress and switch from saver to spender but the motivation (extensive travel) will provide the push.

Right now (its been 3 hours since I walked out the door for the last time - lol), I am feeling a kind of sadness that such a significant part of my life is over. I spent 40 years working, largely enjoying what I did (but not enjoying the associated deadline stress), and I have always held very tightly to the idea that a stable job I enjoyed was a very important thing and was to be treasured, and protected. It just feels so strange to have walked away, or separated myself from those long held beliefs, just hours ago.

This is not a feeling of fearing I may lose my identity without my career, I do not think I will feel diminished, or bored. I just feel like I have let something important go and I wonder how long I will feel the dissonance.

I really enjoyed much of my work but the imbalance between that pleasure and my perceptions of the time I had left time left finally became too great. It feels like the breakup of a personal relationship that I wanted and initiated, despite the sense of loss that would come from it. Did some of you feel that way? Should I expect to grieve this like a relationship that was very important but that I knew had to end because it was holding me back?

So, tomorrow looks to be an amazing spring day. I will get out and do some fun things, and start planning some chores that I and the weather have been putting off since last fall. I will probably spend too much of the day ruminating.

She was a very nice and pretty girl and we remained very close even as the years took their toll on our relationship. But I have to move on. I hope she finds someone new. I will always be grateful I was able to say goodbye on good terms.

Congrats! Retirement can be awesome! My career was great for my ego as I was routinely sought after, praised and rewarded. But all of my hard work, ingenuity, talent etc etc that everyone loved and was so grateful for was being put to use for the benefit of others. Clients, employers and employees, other consultant ants and firms. I made things run so much better everyone made more money or projects took less time, employees learned and grew.

Suddenly was doing things just for me or my family and it was great. The only one I had to satisfy was me! What a change. Turning all that attention to my own life, expenses, investments, projects either saved more or earned more than I would have had I stayed in my high paying job these past 10 years…

 

[Out-to-Lunch]

Congrats! As one of the self-appointed custodians of the Class of 2021 thread, I recall "demoting" your departure date on a regular basis. I am thrilled for you that you were able to pull the trigger. Best wishes!

 

[Koolau]

It has been almost 4 years since I, far too optimistically it seems, slotted myself into the Class of 2021. Today was my last day.

Life has a way of interfering with our plans. Congratulations on you FIRE and keep us posted on how it all goes for you.

 

[Badger]

I had a similar experience when I retired from teaching. I finally landed my dream job of teaching at a college after 20 years in other jobs then retired from there after 22 years. I enjoyed preparing my students for their chosen careers in medical fields and had great relationships with the faculty. There was a sense of loss and a concern for how I would deal with the change. But after awhile I came to enjoy the freedom of my own time, the ability to travel more and the pursuit of hobbies that had been on hold for many years.
Congratulations on your "Promotion".

 

[mystang52]

My first summer j*b was as a busboy for a local restaurant, and made some seriously good money, but wow it was hard work. I k new then and there that I wanted to retire! Fast forward to my mid-40's, sipping a frozen daiquiri while in a hit tub on vacation, and thinking to myself "yeah, I could do this the rest of my lie!" When I actually ER'd at age 60, there were no regrets or second thoughts for me! To the OP, congrats on coming over to our side; you'll find it's great to be here..

 

[Koolau]

My first summer j*b was as a busboy for a local restaurant, and made some seriously good money, but wow it was hard work. I k new then and there that I wanted to retire! Fast forward to my mid-40's, sipping a frozen daiquiri while in a hit tub on vacation, and thinking to myself "yeah, I could do this the rest of my lie!" When I actually ER'd at age 60, there were no regrets or second thoughts for me! To the OP, congrats on coming over to our side; you'll find it's great to be here..

Are you doing the daiquiri-in-the-hot-tub retirement or something quite different? I pictured myself on "vacation" in retirement, but though I live on an Island that most would think of as vacation-central, we live lives similar to when we were w*rking (but much more spare time to do little things we like to do.) YMMV

 

[mystang52]

Are you doing the daiquiri-in-the-hot-tub retirement or something quite different? I pictured myself on "vacation" in retirement, but though I live on an Island that most would think of as vacation-central, we live lives similar to when we were w*rking (but much more spare time to do little things we like to do.) YMMV

Not really! I was always a light drinker, but now even less than that - maybe once every 2 weeks. We go away a little more often, but since we enjoy our home life we're also very happy when we're not on vacation from vacation.

 

[NeilDH]

I'm 7 months into RE after a 31-year career. I loved the work I did ... until I didn't. As you say, the accompanying deadline pressure and other pressures -- like, as others said, making sure others were taken care of -- finally got to be too tiresome, and, again as others have said, it was time to focus on me (or us -- my DW also RE, from the same career!). The first few months were like going on an extended vacation, which was great. After January, I did feel like I should be starting some new, important routine. I did a little, but still at a much slower and relaxed pace (if I got tired, I took a break, went for a hike, etc.). Now that nice spring weather is here, I am loving the flexibility and freedom. I'm nostalgic about my career, not missing it. Even if I'm not totally sure yet how my life will take shape now, I know I don't regret leaving that career and not seeking new FT w*rk. Don't be afraid to just ... be. Sit. Look out the window. Enjoy the birds. Whatever it is for you. Decompressing is good.