I'm not in favor of ghosting. You don't have to initiate anything, but if he asks, I think you should tell him what made you feel uncomfortable and/or worried, and that you want some time away. Or that you're done with him. Whatever. If you ghost him he's liable to keep nagging you and eventually you'll have to do it, possibly in person when you aren't ready. Better to do it by text or over the phone.
I'm still not clear on this part:
I came in and he said this knife is dirty and literally threw it across my tiny kitchen and hit the sink missing me and not breaking my dishes in the sink.
Some are taking this to mean he threw a knife at you, but for all the vagueness in it he could have tossed it from further away from the sink than you would've liked but nowhere near you ("missing me"), and then "not breaking" dishes doesn't sound that bad, or maybe it's a typo.
You said it was the second time but gave no info about the other incident, was it throwing something or just pushing you away, or what?
I would also agree that his "joke" about being interested if DH went away was probably not really a joke but testing the waters. At best it was very inappropriate, ADD or not.
Can I also suggest you take the extra 5 seconds to type out "best friend" rather than having many of us scratch our heads wondering who this BF boyfriend is? In a 1:1 text abbreviations probably work well, but in 1:n forum communications I wish people would not try to save a few seconds abbreviating too many things, at the expense of the readers.