Two Age Questions

[Nemo2]

I think I'll take her 90+ if I can enjoy the physical and mental health she has.

+1

 

[Lsbcal]

We are doing our financial planning with the goal of living to age 105 and our last check will bounce.
My parents passed at 70 and 80. My DW's mother is currently 96 and HER mother lived to age 101...so it is not crazy to think 105 may happen to one of us. If we do not make it that far, heirs will get additional funds.

That is my strategy for us. Plus it gives me peace of mind that there is a nice cushion in case of a very nasty period ahead.

But what makes you think checks will be around when you are 105 ?

 

[DougJohnson]

I have no idea how long I’ll live...

I would like to live only as long as I have a good quality of life. For me this means cognitive ability, mobility, and at least some people/relationships that are important to me....

What she said.
-- Doug

 

[IMATERP]

I’d like to reach age 85 (now 58.) I quit smoking almost 12 years ago, exercise, see Physicians regularly, and have been sober for 30 years.

My lifestyle is completely different than my father and his twin brother - who died at 58 and 77, respectively. Both did not have good quality of life at the time of their passing - and that would be the point where I would be ready to die.

I

 

[sengsational]

The youngsters here probably are the ones saying "85 is good enough", but ask them again when they're 84 and you'll certainly not get "85 is good enough", even if they're in poor health. See, they'll have found out that there's a different batch of stuff to live for than there was 20 years earlier.


Also, I think a lot of what we see here is a reflection on the steady declining health over their last decade of our grand parents and parents lives, and wanting to avoid that fate. But your 85 and your grandparents' 85 isn't the same thing...there's a lot going on to improve "healthspan".

 

[Lsbcal]

The youngsters here probably are the ones saying "85 is good enough", but ask them again when they're 84 and you'll certainly not get "85 is good enough", even if they're in poor health. See, they'll have found out that there's a different batch of stuff to live for than there was 20 years earlier.

Also, I think a lot of what we see here is a reflection on the steady declining health over their last decade of our grand parents and parents lives, and wanting to avoid that fate. But your 85 and your grandparents' 85 isn't the same thing...there's a lot going on to improve "healthspan".

Plus at 85 I should still be able to plunk around on my computer which wasn't available to my parents. We don't have to go to the movies because they now come to us. Self drive cars might be here before I get to 85. More audio books nowadays, etc. , etc ....

 

[robnplunder]

.... those whom I had witnessed dying, without exception, they all wanted to live more regardless of their ages. Most of them were suffering from devastating disease and pain and yet, they wanted to hang on to their lives. There are a few exceptions like my co-worker's GM who asked to put her out of her misery. My MIL wants to move on but her children won't let her. But she has deep faith in afterlife and look forward to meeting her loved ones who went before her.



I am no exception. Life is good and it is not a pleasant thought to leave it behind. But my 1st goal is to live healthy until 85. Open another thread like this then and I will probably vote for 95. With my family luck (brothers dying at age 49 & 53, DF at 81), reaching 85 is going to be a tough goal to achieve.

 

[coveredbridge]

I really don't know how old I will get to be. With my family history, I could depart this world anywhere between now and 2059. I would like to hang around long enough to see the Singularity though, and hopefully transfer my consciousness to the cloud for eternity and maybe even transcend biology. Probably won't happen, but it is fun to think about.

 

[RobLJ]

Like many of you, this is quite personal--my fraternal twin had a rare myclonic disease and was bed-ridden for the last 10 years of his life, the last 2 years in a lot of pain. DF, who I never saw miss work and almost never expressed pain, died after a stroke (and probably organ failure) in intense pain for 3 months, at times whimpering.

I'm much more of a wimp than either and would prefer to go, if have my druthers, a year or two before anything like their experience.
My grandparents lived from 85-96 and half of my great grandparents lived into their late 80's and 90's. On the other hand, I drink more than they (almost all were teetotalers, admittedly).

Basically, I don't want to be a burden on my DW or DS's, so I'm good to go, before I would want to wimp out. Hanging on too long sucks, a lot. No doubt, I'll change my tune when I'm playing chess with Death--but I doubt it.

 

[RobLJ]

Because I could not stop for Death –
He kindly stopped for me –
The Carriage held but just Ourselves –
And Immortality.

We slowly drove –He knew no haste
And I had put away
My labor and my leisure too,
For His Civility –

We passed the School,where Children strove
At Recess – in the Ring –
We passed the Fields of Gazing Grain –
We passed the Setting Sun –

Or rather – He passed us –
The Dews drew quivering and chill –
For only Gossamer, my Gown –
My Tippet – only Tulle –

We paused before a House that seemed
A Swelling of the Ground –
The Roof was scarcely visible –
The Cornice – in the Ground –

Since then – ‘tis Centuries –and yet
Feels shorter than the Day
I first surmised the Horses’ Heads
Were toward Eternity –

--Emily Dickinson (#479)

 

[jabbahop]

I am not sure. Tonight I was just reading some studies about how cancer treatments like the chemo I had accelerate aging. I remember a lot of discussion with my oncologist about short term impacts and potential secondary cancers but this is the first I heard of early aging.

I agree about living healthy vs living long.

 

[levindb]

We think we are goin to make it....

That is my strategy for us. Plus it gives me peace of mind that there is a nice cushion in case of a very nasty period ahead.

But what makes you think checks will be around when you are 105 ?

Our sources of income includes SSA checks (DW and I will start at age 70) and slow withdrawal from our nest egg. We assume 3% real growth on our investments and then calculate how much we could withdraw each year to reach $0 at my age 105. (Excel Goal Seek function...easy peasy) We have never spent the amount we could withdraw each year, so the pile continues to grow slowly.

This approach is fairly conservative and we have little concern about the checks not continuing to come (naive?). We may have changes in how SSA will work, but expect some form of payment to continue for the rest of our lives. So far, we have purchased a vacation home, World Cruise, 5 week Safari, and have 54 days (All Inclusive) each year in the Dominican Republic paid for until my age 102...which can be passed down to heirs if we cannot make it. We only spend 2/3 of what we could spend each year with all of that. We believe our checks will continue.

 

[GMfitter]

Hard to tell .Paternal grandfather's side of family averaged mid to late 90s with a few longer than that. Grandmothers side, 80s, but quite a few got cancer.
Father wasn't in my life, so I have no information on that side of family.

63 now, retiring to Florida in Sept. of this year.
Taking meds for hbp and am type 2 diabetes. Not on meds for that as of now.

80+ in decent health would be a blessing.

I'll never forget my grandfather telling a nurse after she said "you are 97! I would have never guessed that, that's great".

He said "what's so good about it? My wife and daughter are gone, most of my brothers and sisters are gone, what's so great about that?"

I felt bad for her.

 

[Lsbcal]

Our sources of income includes SSA checks (DW and I will start at age 70) and slow withdrawal from our nest egg. We assume 3% real growth on our investments and then calculate how much we could withdraw each year to reach $0 at my age 105. (Excel Goal Seek function...easy peasy) We have never spent the amount we could withdraw each year, so the pile continues to grow slowly.

This approach is fairly conservative and we have little concern about the checks not continuing to come (naive?). We may have changes in how SSA will work, but expect some form of payment to continue for the rest of our lives. So far, we have purchased a vacation home, World Cruise, 5 week Safari, and have 54 days (All Inclusive) each year in the Dominican Republic paid for until my age 102...which can be passed down to heirs if we cannot make it. We only spend 2/3 of what we could spend each year with all of that. We believe our checks will continue.

I guess you are responding to my "checks" comment. Just kidding though it could be misconstrued. I was referring to the continual evolution of the banking industry not the possible loss of a source of income.

 

[john4512]

jas4512

I retired eight years ago at 65. Conventional financial wisdom said to plan for a 30-year retirement -- so 95. I also traced my family history back a few generations. On my father's side, my great-grandfather died at 64; my grandfather died at 74; and my father died at 84. So I'm fully expecting to live to 94. I really don't care as long there continues to be quality to my life. Coincidentally, I am going to a funeral this afternoon for an in-law who is at least 10 years younger than me. I'm not sure how long a life he was expecting, but I'm still better off.

 

[Dash man]

It doesn’t really matter to me how long I live. I’m at peace with God and my family. Life is good. No worries for what awaits me. I consider myself fortunate to have lived longer than my mother who passed at 61. My father 72, which I have ten years more to meet. Aunts well into 80s or 90s. Grandparents were spread out. I love life one day at a time.

 

[Retired Expat]

I think we mostly all agree living a long life provided we are happy and healthy is the goal. Didn’t read one post about dying young and leaving a beautiful corpse!

But we should consider the changes coming in the future.. Loss of mobility scares me or not being able to drive. I full expect by the time I am 80 (20 years) self driving cars will be available. Already things like The Amazon echo and Alexa make life easier. Don’t feel up to getting up and going downstairs to see who is at the door, use a Ring camera doorbell and view the door on a phone or echo spot and speak to whomever is there. Then unlock the door remotely with a simple voice command for your friend who dropped by.

My GM had vision issues and needed bright light everywhere provided by huge incandescent reflector bulbs, that also meant running the A/C all the time and getting someone to change the bulbs regularly. Now LED’s put out so much more light, with no heat with much less electricity. What is next?

I can’t begin to imagine what new gadgets and aids there will be in my old age to help me live better and happier but I am looking forward to finding out.

What new invention or technical support would you wish for in your old age to make it easier to live well longer? I am thinking an exoskeleton suit to give me added strength to walk, carry things or open that damn pickle jar��

 

[kcowan]

The average of all my cousins is about 85 so I am hopeful to reach that target. Two are still alive both over 85. One of them and an earlier one who passed at 96 both developed Alzheimers. FI plan calls for 100. Retired 16 years.

We treat each year as if it might be the last so do not put off things. Just bought a new larger condo closer to the ocean for double the price of the current one.

 

[Offgrid Organic Farmer]

At my last oncologist visit one of the things he said to me, was that at least he had bought me another 3 years.

Later that phrase stuck with me and I got pretty depressed thinking about it.

All this cancer treatment and at the worst, it got me another 3 years of life.

 

[Teacher Terry]

A friend of mine just died in her sleep at 62 with no known health issues. I try not to think about it because there is no control. Definitely don’t want to live if I don’t have my mind. A friend of mine had so much chemo which saved her but gave her early onset Alzheimer’s. Interesting also that for some medical procedures/treatments for everyone it saved the harm rate may be higher than the saved rate. I was surprised to read this so it really pays to ask this question when something is recommended.

 

[tuckeverlasting]

Like many others, I hope to have a long and healthy lifespan (healthspan) into my 90's, then make a speedy exit without an extended period of marked decline. This can be summed up as "Live long, drop dead"!

 

[Lsbcal]

At my last oncologist visit one of the things he said to me, was that at least he had bought me another 3 years.

Later that phrase stuck with me and I got pretty depressed thinking about it.

All this cancer treatment and at the worst, it got me another 3 years of life.

That sounds tough and I hope you live a much longer life. If there is time with your oncologist, you might want to ask more about this after indicating it depressed you. After all, maybe the numbers are better then you think and that "3 years" is truly a worst-worst case.

Living our lives based on just worst cases could be depressing for anyone.

 

[EarlyBirdly]

I have it all planned out...I will die one day before my money runs out or I am diagnosed with an unacceptable chronic/terminal condition.

If not, I will just decline all of Man and Medicine's misguided attempts at keeping me alive and just let the Folks Upstairs handle it.

No muss, no fuss.




P.S. - After an NDE and getting half-way to the Other Side, I can tell you...There should be no fear. What I experienced was a pretty good ride.

 

[robnplunder]

A friend of mine just died in her sleep at 62 with no known health issues. I try not to think about it because there is no control. Definitely don’t want to live if I don’t have my mind. A friend of mine had so much chemo which saved her but gave her early onset Alzheimer’s. Interesting also that for some medical procedures/treatments for everyone it saved the harm rate may be higher than the saved rate. I was surprised to read this so it really pays to ask this question when something is recommended.

I've read/heard/seen/remember something like 98% of chemotherapy treatments don't work but people still opt for it b/e of that 2% hope.




The cold truth is, almost everyone, say 98% of us, will do everything to hang on to our lives be it chemo or worse. I wonder how they could still go on but they do. Life is hard to abandon even at age 93, in great pain from fatal disease. I watched my younger brother struggle for 8 years before succumbing to cancer. Most of his organs were failing and he was in constant pain. But he wanted to live yet one more day. We wish, hope, think that we can do differently but I doubt it.

 

[Teacher Terry]

Farmer, I find that confusing because usually if prostrate cancer is treated early it doesn’t usually come back.