I learned a long time ago that the drinkers are the ones that want to pay by equal division of the bill. I refuse to pay for people's drinks, not because I object to drinking, but because I don't drink and often their drinks exceed the cost of their meals.
Maybe the family member that didn't make as much money as you doesn't want to be told that every fricking time that you see them.With family we typically pick up the bill unless one particular brother in law is there, then it's whoever gets the check first. It's an ego thing with him even though he knows we're financially more comfortable. He's refusing to go on a family cruise because we're paying for it. Other family members usually treat us to home cooked meals to contribute their share in the big picture.
Enjoying life!
Maybe the family member that didn't make as much money as you doesn't want to be told that every fricking time that you see them.
I've had group meals where payment was by each of the poll options. However, lots of people are capable of calculating exactly what each person owes, it's not rocket surgery - surprised that wasn't a poll option. These days we just split evenly or ask for separate checks. Allowing people to estimate is our least favorite option - for whatever reason some diners "forget" or underestimate taxes and tips.
“We’re going to split the bill,” said the organizer at my friend’s ninth grade birthday party. I didn’t think much of it until I ended up paying $40 for a $10 entree. I felt cheated because I didn’t order a drink like most others. I was afraid to ruin the party mood, so I concealed my own anger, and that ended up ruining the night for me.
If you’re like people I know, I’m sure you’ve had similar horror stories. The overall feeling is that everyone seems to pay too much and no one is happy.
Thinking about an ideal outcome
What’s an ideal outcome? I think it would have three elements: that each person orders properly, each person pays what is owed, and the money is collected quickly.
How do the three methods compare on these criteria?
Splitting the bill –>Over order, over pay, quick collection
Pay what you ordered–>Order correctly, a few overpay, moderately fast collection
Separate checks–>Inconvenient for sharing, pay correctly, slow collection
So each method is the best at exactly one trait. Perhaps that’s why there’s such disagreement over what to do–each method has its unique merit.
Splitting the bill –>Over order, over pay, quick collection
Pay what you ordered–>Order correctly, a few overpay, moderately fast collection
Separate checks–>Inconvenient for sharing, pay correctly, slow collection
So each method is the best at exactly one trait. Perhaps that’s why there’s such disagreement over what to do–each method has its unique merit.
Of course, people will weight each of those "inconveniences" differently. I don't like subsidizing other people's more expensive meals or liquor consumption...it's not so much the money as a matter of fairness. I don't pay for an oil change by chipping in for someone else's brake job.
It takes little to no extra time to create a new bill for each customer. Then when it comes time to pay, hand me my bill and a portable card machine and I'm done paying in 20 seconds. Restaurants that refuse separate bills fail at customer service.
I agree this is best.Reading articles, some say the best thing is at the beginning someone mentions to ground rules upfront (like we are going to pay separately or some other method).
Same here on both counts. Many restaurants ask upfront if we want separate checks, but it hasn't been an issue yet for us.I'm not interested in eating out with people where I have to "play games" when the bill comes. And I don't. I guess the retirees I eat out with are well off enough that they are proactive about covering their part of any bill - and at requesting separate checks, or taking turns treating, or whatever.
And I can't remember the last time I ate out at a place that wasn't perfectly happy to separate out checks even after the fact if needed.
Restaurants must be the only business in existence where splitting a bill is considered "normal", and where providing people with separate bills for what they actually purchased is frowned upon...in some places, at least.
I've noticed, at least at the places I frequent, the resistance of restaurants to provide separate checks is diminishing.
One place we used to frequent had a policy of no separate checks for groups of 6 or more and automatically added a tip of 18% to the single bill. The last time we went there (4 couples and a single = 9 people), we asked for an exception and they refused. No problem. We handled it OK (thanks to the calculator function on my smart phone) but left no additional tip beyond the 18% on the table, told the manager in a friendly tone we wouldn't be back and we haven't.