Why are older Americans drinking so much

[Milkman]

It is interesting that so many people have alcohol problems after retirement. I traveled extensively when working. Except when I would go out after work for dinner and or drinks with associates (which wasn't too frequent), I would generally take my Kindle to dinner and read while drinking ice tea. On the other hand, at home it was a different story. It seemed like we were always buying beer, wine, and Jack Daniels. After retiring 10 years ago, our alcohol consumption has evolved into less than a quarter of what it once was. I attribute it to the lack of work related stress after retirement.

 

[folivier]

I learned pretty quickly when out of town for meetings or trainings to take my own vehicle for dinner. It seemed everyone else wanted to go out drinking after dinner. I didn't mind a drink or two but not all night, every night. I guess the other guys felt like they were out of town from their wives so they could drink heavily.
Now I seldom drink.

 

[Gallaher]

My mother and father were both alcoholics. My mother was a non-functional, falling-down-drunk alcoholic, and my father was what was described for decades as a "functional" alcoholic (eg, he continued to practice as a psychiatrist for decades) despite heavy drinking every night.

My parents divorced when I was 7 (my sisters were 5 and 9). My mother had what were supposed to be "supervised" visits every year (supervised by her parents) but my grandparents left us alone with my mother on more than one occasion.

On one of these visits, when I was 11 years old, I awakened at 1:00 am to my mother drunk out of her mind, crying on the bathroom floor - she had cut her foot on a broken bottle, and there was blood everywhere. I can clearly remember (age 11!) thinking "It's my job to deal with this, and I mustn't wake my younger sister, because she is just a child." (I was 11 going on 40.)

I tried waking my older sister, but she ignored me and pretended to be asleep. After trying unsuccessfully to stop the bleeding and clean up the blood, I called my grandparents, who must have been in their sixties at the time. They arrived and dealt with the situation; we were whisked away to their house and I think that was the last time they left us alone with out mother. For years afterward both my sisters refused to make the annual visits. I continued to go because I loved visiting my grandparents.

I recall my father and stepmother had "cocktail hour" every night, which lasted about two hours, where they just drank and drank before dinner. She was also a working psychiatrist, by the way. Eventually they divorced and he married for the third time.

My mother smoked heavily, and she died at the age of 62, three weeks before her first grandchild (my sister's daughter) was born. Cause of death was complications of alcohol poisoning and COPD.

My father never stopped drinking entirely - it would ebb or flow, depending on which wife he was married to (or in the throes of divorcing). He eventually divorced the third wife as well.

He developed diabetes late in life, and he cut down on the drinking, but he never gave it up completely. He died in 2007 at age 85.

My mother was a sad drunk, and my father was an angry drunk.

My older sister followed directly in my mother's footsteps - she married and had three children in quick succession. She had started drinking to excess in her twenties; she drove drunk with two of the children in the car; she faced zero consequences for that. The police appeared time and again over the years to scrape her up off the floor and temporarily remove her children.

Eventually she was divorced and to my knowledge she now lives on public assistance in subsidized housing somewhere in New England. Every couple of years she blasts out an email to me declaring that I am the cause of all that has gone wrong in our family for three generations (alcoholic families love scapegoating). I have a spam folder specifically set up to capture these missives; I stopped reading them years ago.

The last time I saw my younger sister (about 20 years ago) she was heavily dependent on alcohol, although not to the extent of the other family members.

The only silver lining to this saga is that my two nieces and nephew appear to have escaped the alcohol curse; they are all living and thriving and doing well.

I cut off all contact with my family long ago. I refused to enable or excuse anyone's drinking, so they were glad to see the back of me.

I have never had a drink of alcohol in my life. I'm not saying this to brag - I simply looked around at the age of 7 and decided that I wasn't interested in ever having to be scraped up off the floor in a drunken stupor - I figured there were better ways to live my life, and it turns out I was right.

Some situations are so toxic they can't be fixed; the best you can do is save yourself.

I think we may be related

 

[Qs Laptop]

It is interesting that so many people have alcohol problems after retirement.

I will once again state that I don't think this has ever been established. Not by the original article in the original post, nor by anecdotal evidence within this thread.

Where is the proof that people drink more in retirement?

 

[aja8888]

I will once again state that I don't think this has ever been established. Not by the original article in the original post, nor by anecdotal evidence within this thread.

Where is the proof that people drink more in retirement?

I think it's by association (more free time + more free time with spouse + More booze available in the free time period).

 

[Qs Laptop]

I think it's by association (more free time + more free time with spouse + More booze available in the free time period).

Sure, that makes sense, on the surface. But it hasn't been established as a fact.

I might as well say that younger ostriches are more prone to sticking their heads in the ground when they are scared than older, more experienced ostriches. But the fact is that ostriches DON'T stick their heads in the ground when they are scared.

I guess I'm too critical of a reader and I'm sick of strawman arguments, innuendo, and click-bait articles. I was really disappointed that the NY Times was the offender in this case.

 

[Route246]

I used to drink a lot in college and for a period thereafter. I had decent tolerance but would still feel it the next day. I know some friends who had the "Irish" gene and could down a fifth and maintain and feel nothing the next day. Those are the ones that should never drink. I gave it up before I turned 30, mainly because the negative biofeedback was increasing as I got older. I got tired of being off and the lingering headaches became a bother. Probably take a drink once every few years now and that is only in a social setting where I feel somewhat obligated.

But, those who are genetically inclined to tolerate a lot of alcohol are the ones who should never drink because it is easy to get in the habit, I know from personal experience in college, but can be very difficult to break that habit.

 

[Calico]

I think we may be related

I hope you got out too.

 

[Gallaher]

I hope you got out too.

I’ve done alright. Retired young with comfortable wealth. Still with my loving wife, 37 years.
Siblings have all had rough lives…very rough. Have not talked to two of my 3 sibs in 20 years.
The tough part has been survivor’s guilt and having to keep sibs out of my life. They are like turtles in a bucket and I have some regret at not helping them.

 

[Calico]

I’ve done alright. Retired young with comfortable wealth. Still with my loving wife, 37 years.
Siblings have all had rough lives…very rough. Have not talked to two of my 3 sibs in 20 years.
The tough part has been survivor’s guilt and having to keep sibs out of my life. They are like turtles in a bucket and I have some regret at not helping them.

I think you're right - we're related!

 

[Helen]

I decided last year that I only have maybe ten really active years left and don't want to be slowed down by the effects of alcohol. Plus the fear of falling, so I only drink NA beer now. I don't miss the alcohol at all, the NA beer has come a long way and to me tastes better.

 

[Chuckanut]

I had a brandy last night. Enjoyed it a lot. That is my second drink this week. Earlier this week it was a can of low-carb beer. Ugh. I will get a better brew from now on if I only drink four or less times a week.