Are your neighbors insane?

[Mdlerth]

I recently had an intensely irritating experience on Nextdoor. I'd been on it for a year or so, and found it modestly useful once or twice. Sadly, that streak came to an end.

I posted a comment on a running thread. It swiftly provoked a couple of opposing responses which I can't describe as anything other than lunacy.

None of the irresponsible raving by the offended neighbors changed my mind regarding the thread topic, but they certainly made me change my mind about their intelligence, tolerance and manners. I had no idea of the extent of mental illness in suburban USA.

I got to thinking, "Were those responders genuinely potty or were they mere trolls throwing out stink bombs for entertainment?" I concluded "no, those imbeciles probably really did mean what they wrote. They really are that stupid." Sigh.

Mark Twain observed that the number of fools is a majority in any town. I've agreed with that for decades, but right now I find it particularly depressing, and I'm ready to withdraw. It made me homesick for the far more sensible environs of ER.org.

No doubt, for the average IQ to be 100, there must be a large number of below-average brains meandering through the world to balance out the smarter ones. But I would have expected that holding really, really stupid opinions was self-limiting. Surely, people that idiotic would either be inexorably migrated to less-nice neighborhoods or else removed via spectacular Darwinian elimination. Yet, so far, karma has inexplicably overlooked them.

Anybody else been similarly disillusioned about the sanity of their neighbors?

 

[Amethyst]

People aren't necessarily insane or stupid; just bigoted, prejudiced, and always, always selfish.

I haven't been on Nextdoor because my previous neighborhood did not have the density to support it. I do know that the neighbors, very prosperous people (software engineers, business owners) for the most part, brought everyone's property values down because they take horrible care of their property: not maintaining home exteriors, parking derelict vehicles, letting relatives make deep truck tracks all over their lawns. There is no HOA, but you'd think well-educated, affluent people would know better...wouldn't you?

 

[cbo111]

If nothing else, events of the past couple of years have highlighted that our country has a large number of very special people. The nice thing about Nextdoor is you can mute any other member with a click of a button. Then you will never see their posts. Personally, I use the group functions in Nextdoor for posting announcements for club activities. Also use it to buy and sell stuff quickly.

 

[braumeister]

Pretty common, I think.

All the world is queer save thee and me, and even thou art a little queer.

-- Robert Owen, 1828

(and he was referring to his business partner!)

 

[RunningBum]

At my previous place, my next-door neighbor seemed just a bit off when I met her. I got to know the neighbor on the other side and somehow I asked or made some comment about her. He paused, and said he felt he know me well enough to tell me. The people who used to live in my house and those neighbors used to be great friends, but got in some argument and stopped getting along, as neighbors do. Not long after, the people in my house went out for 20 minutes, and came back to find F___ YOU spelled out in spray paint on their garage door. They never proved it but assumed the lady saw them leave and got out her paint.

From then on I was cordial but kept my distance. One day a paramedic truck showed up at the house, found out later she'd taken a bunch of pills and called her husband, apparently not the first time. I moved not long after--unrelated to that, but I was happy to be away from them, their yippy dog, and bratty kids.

 

[cbo111]

At my previous place, my next-door neighbor seemed just a bit off when I met her. I got to know the neighbor on the other side and somehow I asked or made some comment about her. He paused, and said he felt he know me well enough to tell me. The people who used to live in my house and those neighbors used to be great friends, but got in some argument and stopped getting along, as neighbors do. Not long after, the people in my house went out for 20 minutes, and came back to find F___ YOU spelled out in spray paint on their garage door. They never proved it but assumed the lady saw them leave and got out her paint.

From then on I was cordial but kept my distance. One day a paramedic truck showed up at the house, found out later she'd taken a bunch of pills and called her husband, apparently not the first time. I moved not long after--unrelated to that, but I was happy to be away from them, their yippy dog, and bratty kids.

I think we are talking about a different "Nextdoor"

 

[RunningBum]

I think we are talking about a different "Nextdoor"

I thought it was insane neighbors in general, not limited to insanity discovered via Nextdoor.

 

[eytonxav]

The thing that strikes me the most regarding neighbors is an overall lack of common sense and respect for other neighbors.

 

[joeea]

Anybody else been similarly disillusioned about the sanity of their neighbors?

No. My neighbors are all sane. Most of them are also very nice.

People feel free to express themselves online in ways they likely wouldn't in person. That applies to Nextdoor as well as any other online forum.

I generally don't attribute that to insanity, unless you consider all social media inherently insane. Sometimes I do feel that way though.

 

[Koogie]

The North American Imbecile (Imbecilus Borealis Americae) is at home in all environments from the northern tundra to the southern deserts.

They reproduce rapidly and often loudly. They consume all available resources and their dwellings are often in poor repair. They will encroach on the habitat of more intelligent species if allowed to do so.

Best avoided or ignored if possible.

 

[Walt34]

Anybody else been similarly disillusioned about the sanity of their neighbors?

Apparently I've been fortunate with the neighbors I've lived nearby, I got along with all of them and there weren't any real oddballs or freaks among them. So far anyway.

Now family, on the other hand...

 

[Bamaman]

We live in a neighborhood where the homes run from 5,000 to 10,000 square feet.

Almost everyone here is a doctor, lawyer or other self employed profession. And they work such long hours that we seldom see any of the neighbors.

And since we never see them, we have never known any of them--after being her 3 years. Our last home had 2 acre minimum yards, and no one knew each other because they lived so far apart.

 

[Janet H]

If by "insane" you mean: rude, arrogant, self-centered, stupid, unbelievably opinionated and downright annoying; then yes, I've had those neighbors. Tried being reasonable, nice, not nice - all sorts of approaches over the years and finally I moved to get away from the neighbor. I'm much happier now.

It turns out beating trolls at your back fence can make you miserable
As with internet trolls, the only way to win with my real life neighborhood troll was to disengage.

 

[Whisper66]

I generally find the neighbors that complain the most about their neighbors are the neighbors I least want to be around.

 

[W2R]

I don't use NextDoor.

But the question was, are my neighbors insane. I'd say no, generally they aren't as far as Frank and I can tell.

As a group I'd say that our neighbors are kind, well behaved, educated, cultured, tidy, responsible, friendly, quiet, considerate, and not intrusive. Most of them are older than we are and many have lived here since the homes were built in the 1960's.

Of course, being older they are slowly starting to die off but so far the few moving in are very nice (and sane).

 

[davebarnes]

My immediate neighbors are great. We spend lots of time chatting (alcohol may be involved) on our shared patio that we built with our duplex neighbors.

I do not see "insane" behavior on NextDoor.
I see some people who are genuinely afraid of many things. They just worry too much.
I see many people who are extremely helpful.
Maybe because we all enjoy living the in the Social Paradise of the City & County of Denver.

 

[MichaelB]

Why does the OP think this condition only affects people in the ‘burbs? When it comes to trolls and crazies, city and country folk are right up there, and in some cases, they surpass.

 

[razztazz]

The thing that strikes me the most regarding neighbors is an overall lack of common sense and respect for other neighbors.

This is current American trendy social behavior or ethos. It's all about me! You don't count. It's been building for a while. And I mean decades. It's not a product of the current political scene, although I see politics as an expression fo it. Everybody, at every level, feels entitled "get away with it." whatever it might be they are trying to pull. To paraphrase As Rodney: "I don't give no respect. No respect at all." Or as my uncle used to say in his famous rhyming advice: "Bravo a mi! Ba f*nculo, a ti!! "

 

[razztazz]

If by "insane" you mean: rude, arrogant, self-centered, stupid, unbelievably opinionated and downright annoying; then yes, I've had those neighbors. Tried being reasonable, nice, not nice - all sorts of approaches over the years and finally I moved to get away from the neighbor. I'm much happier now.

It turns out beating trolls at your back fence can make you miserable
As with internet trolls, the only way to win with my real life neighborhood troll was to disengage.

This! Just call me The Fugitive! Like David Janssen, I consider myself a man of the run. Can find a few years of tranquility here and there but ... somebody eventually shows up to ruin it.

 

[Sunset]

Sadly half of our neighbors are special, except for 5 houses not in the list:

• The 2 fake disability ex-postal workers couple, who cannot work but mow lawn, go for bike rides, etc.
• The paranoid bigoted ex-postman, whose wife works to get a break from him.
• The Vampire - harmless but enters and leaves house like batman in and out of the bat cave, and otherwise never see outside, weird hammering sounds from inside the house.
• The mommy's boy who is Yelling big business deals on his phone in the open garage every day for years.
• The Sex offender who has guns (which IL does nothing about) and likes to complain about nearly everything.

I have learned to not to talk everyone I can avoid, but wave as I drive by so I look friendly.

 

[MuirWannabe]

Most of our neighbors are a little weird. It couldn’t possibly be me of course.
As for Nextdoor, trolls abound like all social media. Except these trolls actually live near each other. It does amaze me how easily rude and awful people can be, even when ‘next door’ to each other.

 

[ugeauxgirl]

Never had a bad neighbor, but I have generally lived in rural areas. Lots of space between us and the folks next door.

 

[Physics Guy]

Mostly my neighbors are hidden. I know there are people in the houses but I never interact with them.

When I do interact with them I generally find them about the same as other people. Opinionated and more self-centered than I'd really like but basically ok. They probably feel similarly about me.

 

[albireo13]

Mostly my neighbors were nice except the one time my neighbor tried to have a road paved across my property. A letter from my lawyer fixed that.

 

[Breedlove]

Are my neighbors insane , hell yes ! This is why we fit in , really we don't have a whole lot to do with our neighbors . Our drive is 300' long and we are surrounded by pine trees ( tree farm ) . When we see them they always act nice always someone wanting to give us a puppy . Where we live in a very rural community everyone knows your business if they don't they make it up . We just blow it off.