SecondCor521
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
For those of you playing along at home, I was married for 15 years and have been single now for 5 years. On rare occasions, including the present moment, I consider myself to have achieved the position of being just barely capable of going on a date. This notion generally strikes fear into the core of my being since I only ever really dated one person -- my last first date was in 1986. I therefore find myself feeling very much toward dating like a person raised by wolves might feel towards polite society.
So, ladies, help an extraordinarily clueless guy out if you don't mind with some utterly basic rules of thumb on asking someone out. I understand each woman is different and has different opinions, but if you can steer me away from the most egregious errors...well, I would be really grateful.
Questions I have:
1. Is it best to suggest a specific activity? (I am guessing "would you like to go bowling?" is better than "ya wanna go out sometime?")
2. Is it best to suggest a specific date/time? (I am guessing "would you like to go bowling this Saturday?" is better than "ya wanna go bowling?")
3. How well should you know someone before asking them out? It seems one would want to at least exchange a few pleasantries first, but being pen pals for 5 years first is obviously too long, right? How much is appropriate at a minimum?
4. Is in person required, or is email OK? By phone? (Telegraph? Carrier pidgeon?)
5. Obviously women sometimes try to signal interest in various ways to guys they like to encourage said guys to ask them out. Any advice on what constitutes such signals? (I told you I was horrifically bad at this!)
6. What good ways are there to ensure that she has a gracious way to decline? Certainly women must be asked out often by guys that they're just not into, and it seems wise to give them an out in such cases.
7. What good ways are there to ensure she has ample warning? It seems that it would be kind to give a prospective date at least a "shot across the bow" in some fashion so, if she is not interested, she at least doesn't need to hem and haw for an reason to decline. (Perhaps women practice such things as teenagers, I have no idea.)
8. Any thing else I should know?
Thanks in advance for any and all input.
2Cor521
So, ladies, help an extraordinarily clueless guy out if you don't mind with some utterly basic rules of thumb on asking someone out. I understand each woman is different and has different opinions, but if you can steer me away from the most egregious errors...well, I would be really grateful.
Questions I have:
1. Is it best to suggest a specific activity? (I am guessing "would you like to go bowling?" is better than "ya wanna go out sometime?")
2. Is it best to suggest a specific date/time? (I am guessing "would you like to go bowling this Saturday?" is better than "ya wanna go bowling?")
3. How well should you know someone before asking them out? It seems one would want to at least exchange a few pleasantries first, but being pen pals for 5 years first is obviously too long, right? How much is appropriate at a minimum?
4. Is in person required, or is email OK? By phone? (Telegraph? Carrier pidgeon?)
5. Obviously women sometimes try to signal interest in various ways to guys they like to encourage said guys to ask them out. Any advice on what constitutes such signals? (I told you I was horrifically bad at this!)
6. What good ways are there to ensure that she has a gracious way to decline? Certainly women must be asked out often by guys that they're just not into, and it seems wise to give them an out in such cases.
7. What good ways are there to ensure she has ample warning? It seems that it would be kind to give a prospective date at least a "shot across the bow" in some fashion so, if she is not interested, she at least doesn't need to hem and haw for an reason to decline. (Perhaps women practice such things as teenagers, I have no idea.)
8. Any thing else I should know?
Thanks in advance for any and all input.
2Cor521