The Cheap Thrill-Airport Security Measures run Wild

So, this poor guy was just duped into burning off his junk with no real hope of downing an airliner?

Defense: Underwear bomber's attempt may have been impossible | freep.com | Detroit Free Press

Defense attorney Anthony Chambers, who is serving as stand-by counsel to Umar Farouk Adbulmutallab, the Nigerian passenger accused of trying to blow up the airliner using hidden explosives in his underwear, is trying to get the complete file on his client from the federal defender’s office.
In a motion filed Monday, Chambers wrote that the file contains “expert information which disputes the government’s allegations and furthermore, that the alleged attempt to ‘destroy an aircraft’ was impossible!”
 
Someone sent me the latest stats on the current year of screening, including the new enhanced methods:



Terrorist Plots Discovered 0

Transvestites 133

Hernias 1,485

Hemorrhoid Cases 3,172

Enlarged Prostates 8,249

Breast Implants 59,350

Pacemakers 5,987

Adult Depends 9,871

Natural Blonds 3













 
Seems like with today's attack in Moscow, the terrorists have finally got a clue: if you want to kill people who fly in planes, you don't need to get on the plane with the bomb.

Exactly what that means for travellers is anyone's guess. Apparently the Moscow suicide bombers blew themselves up in, or just outside, the international arrivals hall. I suppose we'll have all the current stuff, plus checkpoints on the approach road to the airport. Add another hour to your journey...
 
It means TSA gets to play with junk at curbside. Step out of the vehicle and spread 'em.
 
My last trip back to the US was in 2008. I cleared Immigration in Chicago and transfered to my connecting domestic flight. When we were going through the gate security, I heard a shaved head TSA officer raise his voice and say "I need a photo ID!" The lady was visibly shaken and produced an expired drivers license. The TSA guy examined it then starts screaming "This license has expired, I want a photo ID NOW!" The whole room got quiet and everyone was looking on in disbelief.

I know TSA personnel have a job to do but they need to be a bit more professional and remember who they are working for...
 
.................

I know TSA personnel have a job to do but they need to be a bit more professional and remember who they are working for...

Well why do you think they fired him from McDonald's?
 
My last trip back to the US was in 2008. I cleared Immigration in Chicago and transfered to my connecting domestic flight. When we were going through the gate security, I heard a shaved head TSA officer raise his voice and say "I need a photo ID!" The lady was visibly shaken and produced an expired drivers license. The TSA guy examined it then starts screaming "This license has expired, I want a photo ID NOW!" The whole room got quiet and everyone was looking on in disbelief.

I know TSA personnel have a job to do but they need to be a bit more professional and remember who they are working for...


I wonder about the picture ID also... I gave an expired license to an agent one time... and he looked at me a bit strange... he said 'this is expired'... I said 'who cares, it is a picture ID.. I have not changed'... which got me another strange look... I then pulled out my new drivers license with the EXACT SAME PICTURE (our state will issue you a second license without getting a new picture)... he looked at it and said something about having to be searched or something with an expired license... then said... 'you can go through now'...

I just don't get it... a picture ID is a picture... that IDs you... who cares if it is expired...
 
I wonder about the picture ID also... I gave an expired license to an agent one time... and he looked at me a bit strange... he said 'this is expired'... I said 'who cares, it is a picture ID.. I have not changed'... which got me another strange look... I then pulled out my new drivers license with the EXACT SAME PICTURE (our state will issue you a second license without getting a new picture)... he looked at it and said something about having to be searched or something with an expired license... then said... 'you can go through now'...

I just don't get it... a picture ID is a picture... that IDs you... who cares if it is expired...
IQ, amigo, IQ. Explains many (most?) of the weird events in a typical day.

Ha
 
And always remember no matter how thorough the pat-down, it is considered rude to offer a tip.

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Airport bans toy soldier's three-inch rifle from plane because it's a safety threat

This gets better every day. I am glad this happened in London, though. No offense to the Brits on the forum, but we do need someone else in the world to share in the farce this has become.


The crouching, camouflaged figure is most certainly armed. But few would say he was dangerous.
Security officials disagreed however when he passed through a scanner at Gatwick Airport.

His three-inch, plastic toy gun was branded a ‘firearm’ and banned from a transatlantic flight.
Airport bans toy soldier's three-inch rifle from plane... because it's a safety threat | Mail Online
 

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I'm still slightly po'd by the TSA agent that announced "take off your belts and shoes and put them in the plastic bin". I took off my shoes and put them in the bin. He came over to me and said "I said take off your belt". I was wearing a sweater that covered my waistline and I told him " I'm not wearing a belt" and lifted my sweater for proof. He then directed me to the whole body scanner line. These people are unreal.
 
I'm still slightly po'd by the TSA agent that announced "take off your belts and shoes and put them in the plastic bin". I took off my shoes and put them in the bin. He came over to me and said "I said take off your belt". I was wearing a sweater that covered my waistline and I told him " I'm not wearing a belt" and lifted my sweater for proof. He then directed me to the whole body scanner line. These people are unreal.

Maybe it was his way of telling you that he thought you were hot. ;)
 
Well, this is progress. I assume RF scans are less dangerous than x-rays. And the generic body shapes are a vast improvement. It just goes to show that public ridicule is the mother of invention. TSA unveils 'generic' body scans - USATODAY.com

Sort of. The machines the TSA has approved are old 1990s designs. The rest of the world went with something a bit more modern. These newer systems have been installed outside the US for some time.

There are now millimeter wave RF scanners that, rather than looking like Dr. Evil's phone booth, are compact units that look like a small worklight on a stand, with a simple display on the back that indicates pass/fail, and what area needs to be searched. These are being deployed to scan people waiting in security lines unobtrusively. The first generation of these came out in 2003, and the current products are mature second generation designs, unlike those selected by the TSA/lobbyists.

mobilescan.png
 
I suspect the TSA just doesn't like the look of the compact millimeter wave scanners. Their huge plexiglas booth RF scanners are designed to convey a certain impression to those under the ever-vigilant eye of the TSA inspectors...

20061227booth.jpg
 
Heh, the could still have a menacing looking booth, with a Van De Graf generator gently humming away throwing 3' lightning bolts.

It is all in the image.
 
TSA to retest airport body scanners for radiation - USATODAY.com

From Friday's USA Today.
The Transportation Security Administration announced Friday that it would retest every full-body X-ray scanner that emits ionizing radiation — 247 machines at 38 airports — after maintenance records on some of the devices showed radiation levels 10 times higher than expected.

The TSA says that the records reflect math mistakes and that all the machines are safe. Indeed, even the highest readings listed on some of the records — the numbers that the TSA says were mistakes — appear to be many times less than what the agency says a person absorbs through one day of natural background radiation.
And so the saga continues ...
 
The Transportation Security Administration announced Friday that it would retest every full-body X-ray scanner that emits ionizing radiation — 247 machines at 38 airports — after maintenance records on some of the devices showed radiation levels 10 times higher than expected.
Well, golly! Surprise, surprise, surprise! Who would think that hiring folks at $10/hour to run radiology equipment, with no health physics training (like, for example, that dental assistant doing your bite-wings has received) could possibly go wrong?

The TSA says that the records reflect math mistakes and that all the machines are safe. Indeed, even the highest readings listed on some of the records — the numbers that the TSA says were mistakes — appear to be many times less than what the agency says a person absorbs through one day of natural background radiation.
Yeah, math errors! That's the ticket! Math errors...

Meanwhile, people with actual experience in calculating radiation dosages say things like:
David Brenner, the head of Columbia University’s Centre for Radiological Research, says the concentration on the skin – one of the most radiation-sensitive organs of the body – means the radiation dose is actually 20 times higher than the official estimate.
Dr Brenner says the most likely risk from the airport scanners is a type of skin cancer called basal cell carcinoma, which mainly occurs on the head and neck and is usually curable.
The researcher was consulted to write guidelines for the security scanners in 2002 but said he would not have signed the report had he known the devices were going to be used so widely.
"There really is no other technology around where we're planning to X-ray such an enormous number of individuals," he said. “While individual risks will be extremely small, the population risk has the potential to be significant.”
The research also shows children are more vulnerable to radiation damage, because they have more cells dividing at any one time than when fully grown and a radiation-induced mutation can lead to cancer in adulthood.
I bet he gets an appointment with Dr. Jellyfinger for every future flight he takes.
 
I'm just back from a visit to the US and I have to report that I'm bitterly disappointed.

You see, I checked in at Seattle for my return flight, and I had the easiest security experience of my life.

I took my laptop out of my backpack, put both on the conveyor, took off my shoes, walked through the metal detector, put on my shoes, picked up my stuff, and walked away.

Total time: 1 minute. No queue at all (this was at the extreme left-hand end of the terminal; for some reason, very few people use that security lane). No backscatter, no "enhanced patdown" (yes, I had my kilt on). No patdown at all, as I passed the metal detector test.

I was getting all set to protest, but there was nothing to protest about. The staff were friendly and helpful at all times.

What did I do wrong? :D
 
Get some coffee, REW--he said he WAS wearing his kilt!
I think they were scared you'd pull some kind of Braveheart on them. :)
I just went through pretty routine security on both ends of a trip from here to Vermont. Boring, short lines.

Well, there was some brief entertainment when I took my camera bag out of my roller bag and a bra fell out of my bag. To my utter mortification, the young cute TSA man doesn't just call my attention to it, but instead reaches down, picks it up in two fingers, and dangles it in midair before calling me back to retrieve it!

sigh...
 
Well, there was some brief entertainment when I took my camera bag out of my roller bag and a bra fell out of my bag. To my utter mortification, the young cute TSA man doesn't just call my attention to it, but instead reaches down, picks it up in two fingers, and dangles it in midair before calling me back to retrieve it!

sigh...
Ya shoulda packed a bigger one... :)
 
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