audreyh1
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso) Give me a forum ...
I was always the larger bread winner in the family. I was more advanced in my career, having gotten my degree at a much earlier age than my husband who entered the military to pay for college, and then took longer to get his degree while he was working. I had more aptitude for management, and thus was on a "fast-track" career path. This was just never an issue for us. In fact, for several years before retirement, my husband went into his own consulting business which was more a part time thing, bringing in less money than before, but he worked out of the house which meant he took care of everything to do with the household. This was WONDERFUL, and significantly reduced my stress level which kept ratcheting higher at work as I my promotions continued. And I made enough that he didn't need to work, but it was also great putting what he did earn into our savings.
We had no kids so we didn't ever have who stays home to raise the kids issues.
I cringe when I see ads or attitudes that strongly imply a man's only role in family life is that of the perpetual breadwinner. That's just awful! I feel really bad for any man who's spouse or children see him that way.
But in the case of the article, it does seem that the husband is seriously neglecting his responsibilities - that he is contributing very little at all to taking care of his family. Whether or not he is required to contribute "half" financially (a red herring IMO), they have children they are raising, she'd like to help the children with college, and the family is barely scraping by on her teacher's salary. My god, it's been 5 years! It does kind of sound like the husband has decided to RE and not bother with worrying about the rest of his family. I mean - screaming and sobbing when she tries to discuss permanent work? Why should she have to be the only one working full time? Sounds like he has regressed into being a kid himself.
He probably has a bad depression from being laid off and not finding the same kind of work. But in the mean time, she's left to cope alone?
By the way the advice was totally useless. The wife can lay out the expenses and what they should be saving, etc., but it doesn't sound like the husband is motivated to deal with it at all.
Audrey
We had no kids so we didn't ever have who stays home to raise the kids issues.
I cringe when I see ads or attitudes that strongly imply a man's only role in family life is that of the perpetual breadwinner. That's just awful! I feel really bad for any man who's spouse or children see him that way.
But in the case of the article, it does seem that the husband is seriously neglecting his responsibilities - that he is contributing very little at all to taking care of his family. Whether or not he is required to contribute "half" financially (a red herring IMO), they have children they are raising, she'd like to help the children with college, and the family is barely scraping by on her teacher's salary. My god, it's been 5 years! It does kind of sound like the husband has decided to RE and not bother with worrying about the rest of his family. I mean - screaming and sobbing when she tries to discuss permanent work? Why should she have to be the only one working full time? Sounds like he has regressed into being a kid himself.
He probably has a bad depression from being laid off and not finding the same kind of work. But in the mean time, she's left to cope alone?
By the way the advice was totally useless. The wife can lay out the expenses and what they should be saving, etc., but it doesn't sound like the husband is motivated to deal with it at all.
Audrey