How long did decompression/recovery take?

[David1961]

It's a great question. In my case, after leaving megacorp I went overseas for a few months and felt completely decompressed while I was away. However upon returning home some of the negative feelings and anxieties came back. Sometimes I had nightmares about work. It wasn't an ongoing anxiety but rather it came and went. Seeing some of my old work colleagues for drinks or lunch contributed to these feelings of anxiety. I wonder if it is a kind of PTSD. Anyway it has been over 18 months now and the negativity is almost all gone.

I too wonder if it is a kind of PTSD. Not to the same degree as soldiers who come back from combat, but maybe a milder form. Like you, I have more nightmares after I either see a former coworker or even get an email from one. It's slowly getting better, though.

 

[Helen]

Its funny, when I am in the woods by myself or on vacation someplace beautiful with the family and camper, I can leave it all behind. Sometimes I can do so for a few hours, sometimes for days at a time. But its such a relief that I found myself in my favorite hunting grounds in 20F weather in February lugging around a LOT of gear (safety stuff, heavy clothing, hunting gear, etc.) even times when I probably would have readily admitted all of the critters I was supposedly after were hunkered down to wait for warmer weather. Didn't matter how cold I got - the sense of relief and joy at being outside and away from all the crap more than made up for it. I cannot help but wonder if that is part of what is propelling me toward the exit door.

I was in a job (recently) where I was on call every other week. This went on for 7 years. I sometimes wonder if this helped to rekindle my love of backpacking. I can escape way out in the woods where no one can reach me. It isn't just backpacking I like, but long distance backpacking.

I really hope I still have the hunger to backpack once I retire. I would be disappointed to find out that my passion goes away once I retire (in 4 weeks!!!!).

 

[urn2bfree]

Can't you buy a tail policy and be done with it (at least from a litigation perspective? I ended by last practice years working for large institutions, though in a very risky specialty. Sue me and you're suing the state of Florida.

Back to Brewer's OP: for me, retirement had many phases, often simultaneously. There are personal issues, professional issues to clean up, unanticipated health concerns, self-image readjustment, new family challenges resulting from turf wars or large amounts of unaccustomed time together.

LIberation was the predominant emotion. It started sky high and has yet to drop very much.

I will have a tail...that covers some but not Every Financial aspect of litigation, but that is only a part of the hassle and unpleasantness that getting sued can be.

 

[brewer12345]

I was in a job (recently) where I was on call every other week. This went on for 7 years. I sometimes wonder if this helped to rekindle my love of backpacking. I can escape way out in the woods where no one can reach me. It isn't just backpacking I like, but long distance backpacking.

I really hope I still have the hunger to backpack once I retire. I would be disappointed to find out that my passion goes away once I retire (in 4 weeks!!!!).

Yeah, I make a point of taking my vacations outside of cell service. Sorry, I am in the middle of a million acres of National Forest. Work pronblems take a abckseat to dealing with bears.

 

[ERhoosier]

As a retiring MD, I won't feel I can relax until the statute of limitations on getting sued has been passed.

I've heard similar from many retiring doc's.
For OB's that can mean 18-21 yrs

 

[NC 57]

Retired in September 2012 at 57. Still get calls from former employer for advice and an occasional small project for which I bill large fees as I really don't want the work. DW would say I haven't decompressed and the fact I take these small assignments demonstrates I can't let go. As for me I do want to cut completely loose but I'm concerned about the economy and potential collapse which makes me feel I should keep earning as long as I can. My assets allocation is 50/50 and Firecalc says I'm good to age 98 even if I never draw my corporate pension which starts at 65. I've had health issues, cancer and neuralgia. The neuralgia likely resulted from stress in a pressure cooker job.

A former colleague has asked me to consider a large consulting project with his megacorp which will be lucrative and add a nice cushion to our savings, but will require me to work all summer and cancel our travel plans. Plus last employer is increasing the number of requests for help. I also have a potential opportunity to teach at a nearby university business school. DW says no to all as she is concerned the stress will affect my health and she wants to get on with full retirement. I'm still considering the project so it is true I haven't decompressed.

 

[Walt34]

About year for me. We moved within a month of retirement and were busy with the new house and learning a new area, but at a much slower pace than working people do. "Hey, we've got all day...."

But the job was high visibility, high stress, and things moved quickly. Not having that took quite a while to get used to. What I'm doing now is much more relaxed and low stress.

 

[cantlogin]

The feelings of liberation and freedom came instantly. I mean, walking from the office to the car for the last time, instantly. Getting used to the wealth of time available to use for myself was a gradual process but after 9 years of ER I'm very well acclimatized.
The bounty of opportunity that accompanies freedom from schedules and responsibilities is limitless and whenever I pause to ponder that for a moment the feelings of elation wash over me. Seriously, it's that good.
Finding this forum helped me prepare, and provided the confidence in the possibility that life like this is possible. This might not be for everyone but when I read about your enjoyment of the winter woods I'm pretty sure you'll do just fine.

Thanks for helping me to be where I am.

 

[Sarah S]

As a retiring MD, I won't feel I can relax until the statute of limitations on getting sued has been passed.

Retiring on Friday and honestly never thought about continuing to worry! Thanks a lot!. But like you will be covered by my policy....

 

[Gotadimple]

About 6 months. I had a large staff and was working 60 hour weeks.

The first 3 months to recover from exhaustion. A nap every afternoon, the next three months to begin to find a daily routine. It's been 4 years +, I still have dreams occasionally, but they the ones you have just before waking up.

-- Rita

 

[FIREd]

I think it took me several months to adjust. I was not completely burned out so maybe I recovered more quickly than most. During the first few weeks of ER, I pretty much kept a work-like pace, waking up early and doing tons of projects around the house. After a few months, I kinda crashed. Projects were done, and I would wake up in the morning feeling a bit anxious and wondering how I would occupy my day. I felt like I should be doing something and felt guilty for being idle. I think it was the real transitional/decompression phase for me. I got over it in a matter of months and finally found my ER groove.

 

[audreyh1]

6 months for the bulk of it. Fortunately I had given myself permission to be a goof off for at least 6 months, so I didn't stress over it or try to make detailed long term plans.

After 1 year, I felt completely past any residual work trauma. At this point it became much more clear what I wanted to do for at least the next 5 years if not longer. I was glad I had let myself experiment/try things for the prior 6 months without making any long-term commitments.

About once a year I have a "back at work" dream. I wake up and wonder where the heck that came from because it's totally foreign now.

 

[ER Eddie]

Sounds like 6 to 12 months is about the average range. I like the idea of setting aside that amount of time, just to decompress.

 

[scrabbler1]

Like some others here, I worked part-time for a while before fully ERing, so there was little change from that to not working at all.

This means the big change was switching to part-time originally, which for me was in 2001 when I worked full time then worked part-time, mostly from home. My commute went from 5 days a week to 1 day a week with my weekly hours going from 37.5 to 20. Took about a week to get used to that.

In 2003 I had a setback as the telecommute went away but the part-time remained. My commute went from 1 day a week to 3 days a week. NEVER got used to that, as I knew even then that it would be my eventual undoing. In 2007, I was able to reduce that to 2 days commute per week and 12 hours worked. Liked that reduction at first but it did not last long.

In late 2008 I left work altogether, ERing. Going from 12 hours and 2 days commute to zero of both took me at most a week to get used to, as by that time work had become little more than a nuisance getting in the way of my other activities.

 

[truenorth418]

The feelings of liberation and freedom came instantly. I mean, walking from the office to the car for the last time, instantly. Getting used to the wealth of time available to use for myself was a gradual process but after 9 years of ER I'm very well acclimatized.
The bounty of opportunity that accompanies freedom from schedules and responsibilities is limitless and whenever I pause to ponder that for a moment the feelings of elation wash over me. Seriously, it's that good.
Finding this forum helped me prepare, and provided the confidence in the possibility that life like this is possible. This might not be for everyone but when I read about your enjoyment of the winter woods I'm pretty sure you'll do just fine.

Thanks for helping me to be where I am.

+1 on the call out to the forum and the feelings of elation.

 

[eytonxav]

Brewer,

I suspect the more time you spend doing the things you really enjoy will result in a quicker decompression vs simply sitting around the house relaxing. IIRC you developed a love of hunting and the outdoors, and exercise like krav maga, and I am sure you have many other interests as well to help you decompress.

 

[Donzo]

I had stages - I was hysterically happy/relieved right away knowing I would not be doing the airport every Monday anymore. Waking up at night and realizing I had no alarm to worry about not going off was smile enducing! I took almost a year to truly get to baseline. I had a problem with spending money and was crazy with quicken and watching the portfolio performance. Now I spend freely (for me) and don't worry about the porfolio - I've tweaked my investments and am comfortable with how they are now -- the biggest relief is having more money now than when I retired almost 8 years ago

 

[Katsmeow]

Waking up at night and realizing I had no alarm to worry about not going off was smile enducing!

I semi-retired almost 3 years and go to the office once or twice a week (arriving about 10:00 as it is a long commute) and do a little work at home. The other day I didn't have any real work planned so didn't set my alarm. I would usually wake up about 9:30 but must have been really tired because I didn't wake up until my cell phone rang a little after 10. It was a couple of people from my office who were calling to ask me something and they immediately dove into the topic. I asked them to stop a moment so I could get woke up. Their utter shock that I was still asleep at 10 was priceless.....

 

[packrat44]

I have no clue how long it took to decompress.

During the rat race I use to keep a schedule to make sure all tasks got completed and on a timely basis. After ER I no longer worried about completing a multitude of tasks in a short period of time. Now, it is "why do today what you can put off until tomorrow. Tomorrow may never come." Tasks that make it onto a "to do list" do not seem as important as they once did. Life is good after ER.

 

[tightasadrum]

I've been retired for several years now. There are still things that must be repaired, replaced, rented, planned, improved, weeded, cut, pruned etc. The problem for me is getting my b*tt motivated enough to get started. I come to believe it's because I do not enjoy working on something alone anymore. This is a new feeling for me. If someone else is around to watch, help, criticize, annoy, or hold the flashlight, I'm good to go. I love to help friends and neighbors repair stuff or work on their problems, just not MY stuff. What is going on with this?? Is this a symptom of something going on mentally? Anyone else have this problem?

 

[Greg V]

Only took a couple of weeks to get past the feeling I was just on an extended vacation and then all was right with the world. I was not burned out, but eager to spend more time at home since I commuted a significant distance to my w*rkplace and was not home during the week.

Whether it's a really busy day or not doesn't matter, it's a blessing to be able set the agenda and decide on the activities. Life is good.

 

[GT1 Doug]

I would say I suffered from burnout from my megacorp. I started the decompression process almost immediately, but it was about 6 months before I began to feel I was truly recovering. I am about a year out, and I am just about "normal". I am somewhat addicted to company gossip because most of my friends are still there, but after hearing the continuing horror stories, I am so, so thankful to have left.

 

[ER Eddie]

Did anyone go through a period of sadness or loss, following the exit from the workplace? Most people are talking about feelings of freedom and elation, which is great, but I'm wondering if there were any difficult feelings. For instance, did anyone feel sadness or loss over the closing of such a long chapter of your life, the "end of an era" so to speak? Or loneliness at leaving behind friendships at work? Anxiety over the sudden lack of a paycheck? Disorientation about how to fill your day? etc?

 

[Rambler]

Did anyone go through a period of sadness or loss, following the exit from the workplace? Most people are talking about feelings of freedom and elation, which is great, but I'm wondering if there were any difficult feelings. For instance, did anyone feel sadness or loss over the closing of such a long chapter of your life, the "end of an era" so to speak? Or loneliness at leaving behind friendships at work? Anxiety over the sudden lack of a paycheck? Disorientation about how to fill your day? etc?

Yes, I did for a few weeks. Mostly sadness over leaving behind friends, some of whom I will never see again. Some sadness or emptiness over loss of status, ending an era, a little feeling of "getting old". Some sadness over leaving a business that i was instrumental in building. But mostly relief...a burden lifted. Like I said earlier, it will take a while to for completeness, but I think I'm well on my way.

R

 

[Meadbh]

I had anticipated this but it never happened. My overwhelming feeling has been relief that I never have to endure the bad times again. I feel satisfaction about what I achieved, and I hope that others will build on it, but I am happy to move on.