nash031
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
So, as I've mentioned before, I've been a competitive (high-level age group) triathlete for about 12 years now. This was after a "career" as a runner up to college, then a few years off, and picking up endurance sports again in my mid-20s.
I've been competing athletically in some way for most of my life, and I've long felt more centered when I've got some competitive goal in mind for which I'm training. It helps me watch my diet, ensures I stay in shape, and gives me something to occupy my free time as well. One goal of mine in ER may be to complete the Hawaii Ironman, as I haven't had time to do so in my working life. That's a goal I've had for about a decade, though it's still probably five or more years off given my work responsibilities.
Lately I've been thinking about life after competitive sports. Swimming, cycling, and running to get faster and continue competing for low-level sponsorships and such sometimes feels like a chore. I'll knock out today's swim and feel accomplished, but in the back of my mind I know I have a bike ride and a run tomorrow. Rinse, repeat. There's no real "relaxation" in-season, and that season is about 10 months long.
At age 37, my speed is starting to decline, but as an age-grouper, so is that of my competition. My overall placement trails what it was when I was 31, but I still break out well in my AG. That's both good and bad... I think it'd be easier to walk away placing 25th than it will be placing 2nd in my competitive category ... that whole, "I've still got it" thing sits in my mind, urging me ever onward.
My sport takes a toll on my wife and our time together, our ability to plan outings, fun weekends, and longer trips. Vacations in the summer are peppered with the lingering thought of, "I need to go for a run today" instead of, "let's drink Hurricanes on the beach!" She patiently waits on weekends while I finish my training, and, as she points out, she often gets what's left over after I'm done beating myself on my bike.
I know that some day I will stop doing triathlon competitively. I won't want to train the 6-15 or more hours a week to sustain my current level of competition. I know that I won't want to get up at 4:30AM to race anymore. I won't want to feel guilty about a burger and a beer four nights before a race. I won't want my wife to have to feel as though she's second to my sport.
I worry about what will fill that competitive void. In my mind, it's similar to giving up work... what occupies that time? It's much easier for me to figure things to replace a job that I don't always care for than it is for me to think of things that will replace this passion that's filled time and provided direction for so long. Work just doesn't ignite the same fire for me; maybe it does for some others on here, so maybe your 'walking away from your career stories' would be germane.
I enjoy cycling. I enjoy running. If I never swam again, I'd be fine with that. I just don't know if I can bike/run without feeling like I need to try to win, you know? And sometimes I worry that when I start, say, playing golf, I'm going to feel the need to be as good at it as I possibly can, just replacing triathlon with golf.
So, my question for the wise on this board is, when the time came to give up a real passion because the drive wasn't there anymore, what did you do to fill that void? Was it some smaller, less all-consuming version of it? Did you quit cold turkey and start something else?
How did/would you manage the disappointment of knowing you were capable of doing something much better than you can now because you no longer dedicate or want to dedicate as much time/effort to it? (For me, if I go run a 5K for fun in a few years without formally training, I'm probably going to get wrapped around the axle about my time... just how I've been wired my whole life!)
I've been competing athletically in some way for most of my life, and I've long felt more centered when I've got some competitive goal in mind for which I'm training. It helps me watch my diet, ensures I stay in shape, and gives me something to occupy my free time as well. One goal of mine in ER may be to complete the Hawaii Ironman, as I haven't had time to do so in my working life. That's a goal I've had for about a decade, though it's still probably five or more years off given my work responsibilities.
Lately I've been thinking about life after competitive sports. Swimming, cycling, and running to get faster and continue competing for low-level sponsorships and such sometimes feels like a chore. I'll knock out today's swim and feel accomplished, but in the back of my mind I know I have a bike ride and a run tomorrow. Rinse, repeat. There's no real "relaxation" in-season, and that season is about 10 months long.
At age 37, my speed is starting to decline, but as an age-grouper, so is that of my competition. My overall placement trails what it was when I was 31, but I still break out well in my AG. That's both good and bad... I think it'd be easier to walk away placing 25th than it will be placing 2nd in my competitive category ... that whole, "I've still got it" thing sits in my mind, urging me ever onward.
My sport takes a toll on my wife and our time together, our ability to plan outings, fun weekends, and longer trips. Vacations in the summer are peppered with the lingering thought of, "I need to go for a run today" instead of, "let's drink Hurricanes on the beach!" She patiently waits on weekends while I finish my training, and, as she points out, she often gets what's left over after I'm done beating myself on my bike.
I know that some day I will stop doing triathlon competitively. I won't want to train the 6-15 or more hours a week to sustain my current level of competition. I know that I won't want to get up at 4:30AM to race anymore. I won't want to feel guilty about a burger and a beer four nights before a race. I won't want my wife to have to feel as though she's second to my sport.
I worry about what will fill that competitive void. In my mind, it's similar to giving up work... what occupies that time? It's much easier for me to figure things to replace a job that I don't always care for than it is for me to think of things that will replace this passion that's filled time and provided direction for so long. Work just doesn't ignite the same fire for me; maybe it does for some others on here, so maybe your 'walking away from your career stories' would be germane.
I enjoy cycling. I enjoy running. If I never swam again, I'd be fine with that. I just don't know if I can bike/run without feeling like I need to try to win, you know? And sometimes I worry that when I start, say, playing golf, I'm going to feel the need to be as good at it as I possibly can, just replacing triathlon with golf.
So, my question for the wise on this board is, when the time came to give up a real passion because the drive wasn't there anymore, what did you do to fill that void? Was it some smaller, less all-consuming version of it? Did you quit cold turkey and start something else?
How did/would you manage the disappointment of knowing you were capable of doing something much better than you can now because you no longer dedicate or want to dedicate as much time/effort to it? (For me, if I go run a 5K for fun in a few years without formally training, I'm probably going to get wrapped around the axle about my time... just how I've been wired my whole life!)