Did you work at a diner that served cheap food with tons of free coffee refills? I know that's not exactly easy living.
Nope, this was in the main restaurant of an upscale hotel chain (Westin). Was the 80's. I don't remember what my hourly rate ended up being, I just know it was probably the hardest work I ever did.
But my main point was that we here on this forum can afford to tip properly, and it irks me to quibble over things like tipping on tax when the recipient is almost always making less than $30k per year. (In Florida, that means a difference of what 70cents on a $50 dinner?)
I pretty much always do a quick 20%, since the math is easy, and round it up to the next buck or two, because I like whole numbers. Or on a very small check just go with $5, or $10 or something. There has to have been a real issue with service for me to consider less than 20%.
Sounds like you did not have a great experience. But tipping is not based on wage levels. It is based on tradition and personal service.
Think of all of the minimum wage jobs. Few are tipped.
Lots of people work hard and rely on their wages to pay bills. Wait staff are not unique in that regard.
When I worked in the dish room, or as a cook, I made a higher hourly wage, but I wanted to wait tables. Much more opportunity.
When I waited tables I worked hard and earned good pay. My son had the same experience. And the most productive, busiest waitpeople earned the most. That seems to still hold.
And those that earned the least usually did not like the job, serving folks or hustling. They were either ok with that (enjoyed working less hard) or they moved along.
Just my 20%...[emoji6]