Who has clutter creep?

[brett]

We retired, sold our home, and downsized into an 8x8x16 contained. Then traveled for a year.

This did wonders for our de cluttering goal. Seven years later we still have boxes that we have not opened and things such as china that we do not use and our children do not want.

Since then, we are very careful about clutter. We have no intention of buying things for $100 just so that we can sell them at a garage sale for $10.

We downsized our home and our life. What we have come to realize is that a great many of our former possessions were quite meaningless to our overall quality of life and enjoyment.

 

[Amethyst]

That's called having an exit strategy. It took me years to learn that concept, and not just about household items

When I look back, I don't regret the risks I took, even though they didn't all turn out well. I only regret that I didn't have an exit strategy for the ones that fell through!

Lately I’ve been trying to make a plan for disposing of things before I buy them. .

 

[Amethyst]

I find it interesting that so many people (here and elsewhere) say this, when it isn't at all how I feel about stuff. Just an indication of how we are all different!

I guess that even though we have a lot of possessions, we never bought much on impulse. Mostly, we spent time wishing we had that item; or admired someone else's, and knew we'd love it too.

Basically, we get rid of things that have worn out or are not worth fixing. I hated getting rid of all our framed art prints when we moved recently, since they are no longer cheap to buy, as they were in the 90s. But faded prints aren't too appealing, either.

One thing I am working on is better organization so as to make it easier to keep everything clean. May post another thread on that topic.

W

Since then, we are very careful about clutter. We have no intention of buying things for $100 just so that we can sell them at a garage sale for $10.

We downsized our home and our life. What we have come to realize is that a great many of our former possessions were quite meaningless to our overall quality of life and enjoyment.

 

[ncbill]

I think you went above and beyond. Any heir who expects the benefactors to cull the bequest, while still alive and able to enjoy it, doesn't deserve to inherit.

Not in this thread, but the tone of moral outrage to be found on Internet discussions of "death cleaning" etc. strikes me as bizaare. When did we suddenly grow almost incapable of dealing with parents' estates, as children have done since forever?

Digging deeper, one often finds that the "burdened" heirs are merely mad because parents or grandparents didn't have nice enough stuff. OK, piles of hoarded filth that is actually full of pests - that's a legitimate gripe, about anybody. But mostly it's just whining.

If you personally love to be uncluttered, get rid of your clutter. If you enjoy your possessions, enjoy them. Life is too short.

Remember "stuff" is not worth what it used to bring.

When I cleaned out mom's house over 20 years ago even after letting the family take what they want I still cleared ~$30,000 from the contents...mostly from the furniture.

When I cleared out my aunt's house (furnished much the same as mom's) a couple of years ago after the family took what they wanted I cleared maybe $300...most of the household contents I had to give away or pay to have hauled to the dump.

My in-laws recently refurnished their formal dining room with gorgeous, looks-like-new solid cherry pieces (table, sideboards, buffets, chairs, etc.) from the local "Habitat for Humanity" store for a song...when they pass my wife & I will just have to hope some charity will come & take it all off our hands.

 

[Jerry1]

Remember "stuff" is not worth what it used to bring.

When I cleaned out mom's house over 20 years ago even after letting the family take what they want I still cleared ~$30,000 from the contents...mostly from the furniture.

When I cleared out my aunt's house (furnished much the same as mom's) a couple of years ago after the family took what they wanted I cleared maybe $300...most of the household contents I had to give away or pay to have hauled to the dump.

My in-laws recently refurnished their formal dining room with gorgeous, looks-like-new solid cherry pieces (table, sideboards, buffets, chairs, etc.) from the local "Habitat for Humanity" store for a song...when they pass my wife & I will just have to hope some charity will come & take it all off our hands.

I have tried in vain to get my daughter to look at good used solid wood furniture instead of heading out to IKEA. I just don’t get why she doesn’t see the value. Just a small example, me and DW each have a very nice teak desk. Those desks used to sell at places like House of Denmark for several hundred to a thousand dollars. Solid wood, minimalist design, just want we wanted. We both paid $100 an DW even got a side table with hers. Both were from people moving and getting rid of their stuff. Their loss, our gain. Probably a win win. Mine has some scratches on the top but could easily and cheaply be refinished if I cared. DW’s is in great shape.

Same thing with dining room chairs. DD wanted some new chairs. I’ve shown her some nice sets online for a few hundred dollars. She barks back “I don’t need a table”. Of course, the chairs alone would be a great deal and then just toss the table. No good, she just ain’t buying. Oh well.

It’s a shame that good Solid wood furniture is going into the dumps.

 

[Music Lover]

Remember "stuff" is not worth what it used to bring.

When I cleaned out mom's house over 20 years ago even after letting the family take what they want I still cleared ~$30,000 from the contents...mostly from the furniture.

When I cleared out my aunt's house (furnished much the same as mom's) a couple of years ago after the family took what they wanted I cleared maybe $300...most of the household contents I had to give away or pay to have hauled to the dump.

My in-laws recently refurnished their formal dining room with gorgeous, looks-like-new solid cherry pieces (table, sideboards, buffets, chairs, etc.) from the local "Habitat for Humanity" store for a song...when they pass my wife & I will just have to hope some charity will come & take it all off our hands.

I've probably told this story before. A friend/co-worker had a bad breakup and moved out taking nothing except his clothes...although it was mostly her stuff anyway so no real loss. I rented him a spare room in my house for 3 or 4 weeks until he found a rental. He then went to an estate sale and for $900 or so he bought living room furniture, dining room table, coffee table, dressers, a couple beds, etc. He gradually replaced it all over a couple years by buying stuff he liked that was on sale, both new and used.

 

[Teacher Terry]

Nine years ago when we downsized I sold half of our furniture. I have found I don’t want to dust a bunch of stuff so my curio cabinet and bookcase went recently. I don’t need physical books when I have kindle. I have found that less looks a lot better. I only kept the decorations that I really love. I also got rid of some pictures and bought a few new ones. I am very particular about what I buy now. No single use kitchen items. I emptied the closet in my guest bedroom and got rid of almost all of it. I really wish I could get my husband to let go of stuff. His son has tried to tell him when he dies it’s going in a dumpster. He can never find anything in his areas.

 

[ckelly78z]

My wife is much more of a pack rat inside the house with craft projects, puzzles, books, and decorations.

I am not the neatest in my shop, and barns where I have extra equipment, tools, and unfinished projects. I do regular, organizing days to regain some sanity though.

 

[tb001]

I have tried in vain to get my daughter to look at good used solid wood furniture instead of heading out to IKEA. I just don’t get why she doesn’t see the value. Just a small example, me and DW each have a very nice teak desk. Those desks used to sell at places like House of Denmark for several hundred to a thousand dollars. Solid wood, minimalist design, just want we wanted. We both paid $100 an DW even got a side table with hers. Both were from people moving and getting rid of their stuff. Their loss, our gain. Probably a win win. Mine has some scratches on the top but could easily and cheaply be refinished if I cared. DW’s is in great shape.

Same thing with dining room chairs. DD wanted some new chairs. I’ve shown her some nice sets online for a few hundred dollars. She barks back “I don’t need a table”. Of course, the chairs alone would be a great deal and then just toss the table. No good, she just ain’t buying. Oh well.

It’s a shame that good Solid wood furniture is going into the dumps.

I’m surprised that the minimalist design is going so cheap. IME, the older antiques I grew up with, that my parents still have, are the things you can barely give away. They honestly think they’re sitting on a fortune and it would break their hearts to know what we’ll end up doing to get rid of their things. The royal dux statues alone!

In contrast, here it’s the good quality mid century modern/Scandinavian design that is bringing in the bigger $ now. I sold a set of two MCM chairs in horrible condition—needed completely recovered—for $2k. Tastes have changed a lot.

 

[John Galt III]

As far as couples go, it seems like the usual combo is one person with hoarder tendencies, and one without (60%). 20% have both people being hoarders, and 20% have both people being non-hoarders. Just my observation. Opposites attract?

 

[mystang52]

This thread inspired me to start my next declutter; I'm on day 3 now.

 

[Amethyst]

I agree! I'd be gobsmacked to find somebody selling MCM furniture on FB marketplace, Craigslist etc. The only places I can find it is pricey reseller web sites.

I
In contrast, here it’s the good quality mid century modern/Scandinavian design that is bringing in the bigger $ now. I sold a set of two MCM chairs in horrible condition—needed completely recovered—for $2k. Tastes have changed a lot.

 

[Teacher Terry]

Backseat of my car full of stuff for the thrift store. Motivating thread).

 

[John Galt III]

I’m surprised that the minimalist design is going so cheap. IME, the older antiques I grew up with, that my parents still have, are the things you can barely give away. They honestly think they’re sitting on a fortune and it would break their hearts to know what we’ll end up doing to get rid of their things. The royal dux statues alone!

In contrast, here it’s the good quality mid century modern/Scandinavian design that is bringing in the bigger $ now. I sold a set of two MCM chairs in horrible condition—needed completely recovered—for $2k. Tastes have changed a lot.

I do believe this may have happened, but still am amazed by it. 95% of people would say you have to pay THEM money to TAKE the old chair off your hands. But there's that 5% of the population who will pay a fortune for whatever is being sold.

 

[BarbWire]

Over the period 2006 - 2014, I did a massive downsizing as I needed to move 2,000 miles to a small apartment near my elderly and failing parents. Most of my furniture was sold -- with a few regrets but necessary because I had nowhere for my dining table, for example. In 2015/16 I closed out my parents' home (got ripped off using an estate sale company that turned out to be crooked, but that's another story), keeping a few good MCM pieces of furniture, art, and family heirlooms.

Everything went into storage for 4 years while I travelled. Now I'm back in an apartment for 6 months hiding from Covid-19, and doing another sort/cull. Definitely a pile of " why did I store that?" but not too bad.

My difficulty is with the "family heirlooms." I don't have any close family, and never knew my grandparents, 3 of whom died before I was born. Yet I seem to cling to the things my parents kept: an Indian pot purchased by her father on a trip to Arizona in the 1930s; teaspoons from the Samoyed Club of England; his father's cribbage set. I don't think I will ever look at these things again (and rarely saw them when my parents were alive), but I also can't bring myself to dispose of them. It's exacerbated by the fact I have no one to whom to pass these .... well, not heirlooms but perhaps more accurately "family mementos."

Advice appreciated!

 

[indiajust]

regular donations of worn and rarely used clothes to salvation army. shelters with anything kitchen. magazines to coffee shops.books sold or donated to libraries. electronics to bestbuy recycling. furniture sold or to habitat for humanity. all construction and tools related to habitat also. physical photos scanned and shredded. likewise all paper records. and all music cd's. regifting. I have kept virtually nothing.

 

[aja8888]

Over the period 2006 - 2014, I did a massive downsizing as I needed to move 2,000 miles to a small apartment near my elderly and failing parents. Most of my furniture was sold -- with a few regrets but necessary because I had nowhere for my dining table, for example. In 2015/16 I closed out my parents' home (got ripped off using an estate sale company that turned out to be crooked, but that's another story), keeping a few good MCM pieces of furniture, art, and family heirlooms.

Everything went into storage for 4 years while I travelled. Now I'm back in an apartment for 6 months hiding from Covid-19, and doing another sort/cull. Definitely a pile of " why did I store that?" but not too bad.

My difficulty is with the "family heirlooms." I don't have any close family, and never knew my grandparents, 3 of whom died before I was born. Yet I seem to cling to the things my parents kept: an Indian pot purchased by her father on a trip to Arizona in the 1930s; teaspoons from the Samoyed Club of England; his father's cribbage set. I don't think I will ever look at these things again (and rarely saw them when my parents were alive), but I also can't bring myself to dispose of them. It's exacerbated by the fact I have no one to whom to pass these .... well, not heirlooms but perhaps more accurately "family mementos."

Advice appreciated!

Pretty much same as me. I only knew one grandparent and she only spoke Lithuanian and was dirt poor. I have one daughter who is 41 and her Mom (my ex) has passed.

The few things I have that are "family mementos" are not wanted by my daughter. They consist of a 1890 Waterbury Mantle Clock that was my fathers and a 1919 stand up working Victrola with albums of old thick records that was my grandmothers. I have been hauling this stuff around for 50 years.

I guess I can sell it on Craigslist.

 

[Boho]

23andme just invited me to look at my Neanderthal report. It says I have "2 variants associated with having difficulty discarding rarely-used possessions."

 

[Vinnygret]

Oops. I threw it away in April.

Good for you.