Wow - complete disregard for decedent

[Mr. Tightwad]

I think the lawyers will be the winners here.

 

[pb4uski]

I wouldn't think that he would be competent to execute a revised will after 4 years in memory care.

 

[HarveyS]

Yes. When I contacted her to discuss proceeding with probating his will, she informed me of this as described in the original post.

Sorry, but this is not clear to me in the OP.

Have you told the lawyer in Texas that there is a new will?

In my mind, having a new will changes everything. If SIL did the new will with an attorney (a.k.a liar for hire), I'd say good luck getting it overturned.

 

[Scuba]

I wouldn't think that he would be competent to execute a revised will after 4 years in memory care.

Not to mention why would he have needed a POA to do even the simplest things for him for the last 4 years if he were mentally competent to make such a decision?

 

[Scuba]

Sorry, but this is not clear to me in the OP.

Have you told the lawyer in Texas that there is a new will?

In my mind, having a new will changes everything. If SIL did the new will with an attorney (a.k.a liar for hire), I'd say good luck getting it overturned.

Yes I have shared every detail with the probate attorney. It will be up to the probate judge to determine the validity of all wills filed with the court. I cannot imagine any judge would decide that a will executed by someone with an Alzheimer’s diagnosis who had lived in Memory care for several years would be valid, if such a will even exists. Time will tell.

 

[MarieIG]

Good luck Scuba.

 

[The Cosmic Avenger]

Not to mention why would he have needed a POA to do even the simplest things for him for the last 4 years if he were mentally competent to make such a decision?

Well, you should have a POA signed while you're still competent, but if his sister was using it to manage his affairs before the new will was signed, that would matter.

The diagnosis itself might not matter, as there are different stages of the disease, but if it comes down to proving his competence at the time, his medical records should show cognitive testing and the level of assistance and care he needed based on his cognitive impairment. While the confidentiality of medical records does not disappear at death (otherwise, some people might still be reluctant to seek treatment), this would seem like a case where a court would subpoena the applicable records available as evidence.

 

[pacergal]

Yes, good luck.
I am sorry you have to go through this,

 

[Texas Proud]

Just get more interesting as it goes on...


The question in my mind is were there people who said he was competent when he signed the new will... my mom was in memory care and some health care people said that at times she was competent... I am sure some lawyer did something to make it legal.. but the courts can decide...



BTW, you can have a POA without having any memory problems... I did with my mom... I took over her finances so she did not have to worry about them... did the same for a sister that was in the hospital for awhile...

 

[Willers]

Correct on the POA. I had a POA for my mom for the last decade of her life. It can be done at any time and can also be used at any time. She boasted to her friends that I never stole her money like some other people's kids did.

I am very sorry for what you are going through. I'm glad you have an attorney and the court will decide. I suspect that a will changed after 4 years in memory care will be a tough sell to a judge.

 

[Texas Proud]

Correct on the POA. I had a POA for my mom for the last decade of her life. It can be done at any time and can also be used at any time. She boasted to her friends that I never stole her money like some other people's kids did.

I am very sorry for what you are going through. I'm glad you have an attorney and the court will decide. I suspect that a will changed after 4 years in memory care will be a tough sell to a judge.

Not going back to look but IIRC it was changed after one year... I would agree if it were near the end of life after 4 years it would be tough..

 

[Route246]

There is a special place in hell for all of these people who let money affect their otherwise virtuous soul.

 

[jldavid47]

She suggested that she could just handle everything since as his POA, she had been handling his affairs for the last several years

The POA is terminated when the person dies. We found that out when mom died. I had financial POA and my sister had medical POA. I was executor and successor trustee to her living trust so I was still able to mostly function but not until a separate trust account was set up. My sister immediately lost all access to mom's medical records which made resolving a few outstanding issues more difficult.

The bottom line is your brother in law should have made her executor if that is what he wanted. Since he didn't', you are in charge of the estate.

 

[Aerides]

Who is named executor in the 2nd will that was made after he entered memory care?

 

[latexman]

With the way she’s behaving, she seems to be an evil person and I wouldn’t want her in my life anyway.

Yes, she absolutely does. That’s why she had him do a different one. She didn’t think his other beneficiaries needed to be in it.

Now it all makes sense. She is evil!

 

[aja8888]

I wonder if she has thoughts of probating "her" new will before you do? Maybe she named herself the executor of his estate? (thinking bad things happening here...)

 

[Scuba]

Not going back to look but IIRC it was changed after one year... I would agree if it were near the end of life after 4 years it would be tough..

It was AFTER 4 years of living in Memory Care according to the SIL, within a year of death.

 

[Scuba]

I wonder if she has thoughts of probating "her" new will before you do? Maybe she named herself the executor of his estate? (thinking bad things happening here...)

This could definitely happen, although I don’t think her original intent was to probate it. I think there is a high probability BIL’s wishes will not be carried out, but I feel I owe him and my deceased sister some effort to try.

If the POA misappropriated his assets, there isn’t much I can do. However, if a judge has to decide between the validity of the two wills, it is difficult for me to imagine a situation where a judge would think it was ok for a POA to have an Alzheimer’s patient who had to live in a Memory Care facility to redo his will in favor of the POA. I guess we’ll see.

Thank you all for the sympathetic and supportive comments. I definitely never expected to have a hostile probate situation. Both the POA documents and the legitimate will documents were executed a number of years ago. I was still working in a demanding job and living in CA, while SIL was retired and living in the same region as BIL and sister. I think they believed at that time that they could trust both of us, but given my job responsibilities, they thought SIL could better handle the POA workload and if I were executor, at least I could do that for them. I did offer to help SIL many times with the POA responsibilities but she never wanted any assistance. Now maybe I know why!

 

[Texas Proud]

It was AFTER 4 years of living in Memory Care according to the SIL, within a year of death.

Then I would have your attorney make sure that if she probates the new one that it is contested... I cannot see a judge accepting that one even if a paid for lawyer says it is good..


I can see it working if it was done to make things easier and nobody was going to contest it as the court would not have any knowledge that it might be up to snuff...

 

[Scuba]

Then I would have your attorney make sure that if she probates the new one that it is contested... I cannot see a judge accepting that one even if a paid for lawyer says it is good..


I can see it working if it was done to make things easier and nobody was going to contest it as the court would not have any knowledge that it might be up to snuff...

Agreed ... time will tell.

 

[Imackenzie]

POA's die with the subject of them--they are invalid after death

The Power of Attorney is void the minute he died. Probate and the Will rule. Make sure to gather every scrap of paper he had. Money brings out the very worst in some family members--seemingly always at least one. Certainly was my experience as executor for both my father and now mother.

This may be naive, but I was just blown away today. My brother-in-law, who has been living in Memory Care for the last 5 years, recently passed away. I heard the news a week ago and today I pulled out a copy of his will and realized I was named the executrix. I called his sister, who has been acting as his POA ever since my sister (his wife) died in 2020. After asking how she and the family are doing, I told her I had read over his will and as the executrix, I would need to get a complete list of assets so I could begin the probate process with his will. My sister and her husband had identical wills. Both had charitable bequests and then left the remainder to their sisters, split 50/50.

She suggested that she could just handle everything since as his POA, she had been handling his affairs for the last several years. I told her I needed to fulfill my legal responsibility. Besides, my BIL left a significant portion of his assets to charity, after which any residual was to be split 50/50 between the two of us. She said she should get everything because she had been doing the work to visit him and manage his affairs the last four years, and did not seem inclined to cooperate with the idea of probating the will. Just WOW!

I will be reaching out to an attorney who handles contested estates on Monday. Another attorney I know volunteered to write her a letter, but I’m thinking of engaging a firm who could handle litigation over the estate if it comes to that. I am not sure of the funds involved once his charitable wishes are fulfilled and any creditors are satisfied, and I’m fairly confident it is not a huge amount, but it is just not right for her to disregard his wishes so blatantly.

Has anyone else experienced something like this? If so, any advice?

 

[frances]

In Fulton County, Georgia -

And I know these things because I just went through all this with my mom, who died in November, 2022.
Mom wrote in her will that it didn't have to be probated, but the court said otherwise (UGH) it it took just over seven (7) months to complete the process.
And the best part? It was completed LAST OCTOBER, 2023 and the court never bothered to notify my attorney that the estate was closed ("we don't know why you weren't notified, Mr. Lawyer. Oopsie.") We JUST found out this week it had been closed the second week of October....

Anyway, to my points:
1) probate is REQUIRED now for EVERYONE who dies in Fulton County, GA, intestate or not, thanks to the last elected probate judge.
2) POA extinguishes on death of the grantor of said POA
3) if SIL has been withdrawing funds AFTER BIL's death it seems she is probably in violation of law, and if it were me I would get a good attorney.

Her comment of "I should get most of it because..." is, IMO, invalid.
Just because she CHOSE to do that, and perhaps because OP does not live near BIL, is NO EXCUSE for that type of behavior.
But that's just me.
Some people will say "after someone is gone those that remain will do as they may", but IMO those that remain should try to do right by the deceased and follow their wishes....

 

[rayvt]

I don't expect our kids to fight over inheritances, but you can never tell. We've all heard of stories like this.

We set up all of our accounts with a single beneficiary or single Transfer On Death. Balanced out so that each kid gets approximately the same amount of money.

The house has a beneficiary deed, so they have to split it equally.
The only assets that are not set up with single beneficiary/TOD are a few small bank account, totaling small enough that the estate does not have to go through probate. I doubt that anybody would want to fight over splitting $10,000, after inheriting $x00,000 brokerage & IRA accounts.

 

[Car-Guy]

I wonder if she has thoughts of probating "her" new will before you do? Maybe she named herself the executor of his estate? (thinking bad things happening here...)

I was thinking the same thing. Of course I guess it calls into question if he was mentally competent to change the will when he did. What a mess.

 

[sunnysideup]

I’m in agreement that the POA ends on death…but I’m not an attorney…..I wonder if she was taking monies over time….some folks are greedy…

I would get a lawyer if you want to the executor…..

Good luck.