Free Meals and Retirement "Seminars"

[scrabbler1]

I'm not a restaurant person so these don't appeal to me. What I just realized, though, is that I rarely get them anymore. Two years ago I moved from a tony, shop-till-you-drop suburb with multiples of every major restaurant franchise, to a smaller house in a very nice area of suburb with more blue-collar demographics. Hmmmm. I guess they figure there's less money to be found in this Zip Code. Fine with me.

I go out to eat only a few times a year, so a free meal would not appeal to me. I would surely not like having dinner with a bunch of strangers, having my attention divided while I try to eat. Never have received one of these invites anyway, glad I am missing out on all the fun (Not!).

 

[Aerides]

To the OP, do it once, to make your wife happy you've at least tried. Pick one of the nicer ones over the next month or two.

Other than that... No, Free food is not that important to me. And from what I've read, you're basically sitting in groups for the meals.

Me and DH at a round table to eat with 6 ppl we don't know, who want to talk about finances, is more tortuous an idea than sitting patiently thru a sales pitch.

 

[CoolRich59]

I hope that when you wrote the above all kinds of alarm bells were going off in your head, like they were in mine (on your behalf)!! Behavioral economics suggests that what you might learn is a hard lesson.

My suggestion: avoid at all cost and just go out for a pleasurable dinner with your wife, where the only expectation on you is a nice tip for mediocre service

-BB

Thanks for all the great responses. As you can see, my resolve has been slipping and I'm rationalizing. Thanks for propping me up!

As many of you have noted, these events are likely sales pitches for "valuable" financial products such as annuities or whole life insurance.

I only have to think back to my son's friend who went into insurance sales after he got out of school and tried to pitch me on how great his insurance product because it was an "investment" too.

I told him 'when I want insurance, I buy an insurance policy. When I want an investment, I buy stocks or mutual funds. But, why would I buy an insurance policy if I wanted an investment?'

 

[RE2Boys]

I've been to several, knowing it is a sales job but I'm really good at saying no. Sometimes I even learn something new! Don't fall for the "free consultation" pitch though, that's where the salesman will counter every argument you come up with.

That said, I only go if it is a free meal at lunchtime, I can go without spouse, and don't have anything else scheduled.

 

[REWahoo]

As many of you have noted, these events are [-]likely[/-] sales pitches for "valuable" financial products such as annuities or whole life insurance.

FIFY

 

[Amethyst]

In our experience, they don't want to talk about finances. Most do not want to talk to their table mates at all, unless a common topic is accidentally hit on. Probably related to the lack of wine

The "talks" have varied from pushy sales pitch, to quite interesting (to me) discussions of historical market behavior and the advantages of preferred stocks. But overall - they are meant to get you to sign up for a follow-on session that will be the real hard sell.

And the food is salty.

Me and DH at a round table to eat with 6 ppl we don't know, who want to talk about finances, is more tortuous an idea than sitting patiently thru a sales pitch.

 

[mystang52]

Yeah, it's a free meal, but don't think you get to pick anything off of the regular menu. There are limited food choices, and not their top of the line items. For me, no thanks (for many reasons).

 

[CoolRich59]

FIFY

Thank you!

 

[Jerry1]

I like your style. I could wear my John Belushi suit and ask the guy at the next table "How much for the wife?"

Now that's funny. I'd like to go and watch that - too introverted to do it myself.

 

[OldShooter]

I went to one a few weeks ago, doing field research for an investment class I'm putting together. After I registered I brokerchecked the guy and found 22(!) customer complaints with several resolved in the customer's favor for six-figure settlements. So I was expecting a real huckster. I was not disappointed. FUD about the stock market, half-truths, and outright lies to sell his indexed annuity. Very entertaining, but I felt bad for the suckers who would be hooked. I did report him to our state insurance regulator. We'll see if that produces anything.

The bad news for those looking for a free meal is that the meal was served only after the full 1 1/2 hour pitch. Hotel California IOW.

 

[Midpack]

If you have any genuine interest, there’s nothing wrong with attending even if you don’t buy. But if I know there is zero chance I’m interested in whatever they’re selling, a “free” meal or anything else is beside the point to me. The folks putting on the event are running a business, so it’s disingenuous/dishonest to attend in my opinion. I wouldn’t want customers to knowingly/deliberately take advantage of me, so I wouldn’t do it myself. Kinda how I decide many interaction situations, how would I feel on the other side? It’s about self respect anyway. YMMV, and that’s fine.

 

[Ready]

I only went to one of these, but I did not find any hard sales pitch at all. They barely even allude to what they are trying to sell (It turned out to be fixed indexed annuities). All they really want is to set a follow up appointment with you, but if you say no thanks they just move on. The food was good and I found the presentation fairly interesting. I also enjoy meeting new people, so no problem sharing a table with a small group. The only reason I don’t go to any more is I feel bad eating the meal knowing I have no interest in meeting with them.

 

[JoeWras]

The OP mentioned Ruth's Chris. Interesting, same here. I think R.C. may be partly in on this as it is an advertising vehicle for them. Not saying that's wrong, just find it interesting.

Also, the subject of "talking a lot and not revealing what they are selling" occurs elsewhere. Locally we have paid-to-air radio shows like this. Every Saturday these guys talk for 1/2 hour and say nothing about what they are selling. Just set up an appointment. There is a lot of injection of fear of sequence of return risk (although they don't call it that). They like to mention time and time again the "what if you are retiring now, and it is just like 2008" problem.

We have a few other paid for radio programs that are more direct and they answer real questions. One guy in particular has free seminars, and he makes a point there is no food. But he's a lawyer, so if someone signs up, good fees for him.

 

[omni550]

Twice.

#1 I went to one of these about 10 years ago with my then-BF. Local financial planner gave his pitch followed by a 'blah' pasta dinner.

#2 Last year, while snowbirding in FL, a neighbor asked if I'd go with her to one that was at the Ruth's Chris steakhouse about 5 min. away. The pitch was given by some guy with a local radio show (I'm guessing, as I've not heard it) who had also written a book, and his sidekick.

Food was far better at #2, plus we got wine. (I noticed that the steakhouse had cases of wine that were earmarked for #2...#2 must do a LOT of pitches there.)

After #1 , I received several mailings. I think I was quickly disqualified by #2 (probably due to my "non-Koolaid drinking" responses) as I've not heard a peep from them since.

Lots of folks at #2 seemed to be drinking the Koolaid.

And last week, I also attended an RMD 1-hour presentation by yet another financial organization held at a local college. No food or beverage was served, so I thought we might actually learn something. The presenter spent the bulk of his time hinting about various financial products that most people are unaware of that can save them big dollars.....he spent a lot of time describing how two 72-year old twin sisters had just bought a second-to-die policy...and how mutual funds have undisclosed fees that we are paying taxes on.... somewhere in the middle he breezed over 2 slides of RMD info (containing nothing new). It was designed to leave you a bit uninformed and wanting more info...and to set up a call then and there to get more info. No thanks.

I'll keep throwing all similar future invitations in the recycling bin.

omni

 

[JoeWras]

#2 Last year, while snowbirding in FL, a neighbor asked if I'd go with her to one that was at the Ruth's Chris steakhouse about 5 min. away. The pitch was given by some guy with a local radio show (I'm, guessing, as I've not heard it) who had also written a book, and his sidekick.

Food was far better at #2, plus we got wine. (I noticed that the steakhouse had cases of wine that were earmarked for #2...#2 must do a LOT of pitches there.)

Our posts crossed and went in the exact same time. Another Ruth's Chris! There's something to this.

And that local radio show I think is only semi-local. That book guy I think is more regional and he either travels or has minions.

There's something bigger in the works behind this, like a franchise concept or something.

 

[CoolRich59]

Hotel California IOW.

"You can check-out any time you like, but you can never leave"

 

[omni550]

Our posts crossed and went in the exact same time. Another Ruth's Chris! There's something to this.

And that local radio show I think is only semi-local. That book guy I think is more regional and he either travels or has minions.

There's something bigger in the works behind this, like a franchise concept or something.

Our (SW Florida) guy was Bob Grace with his "Retire with Grace" program.

The free R.C. dinner was the big draw for my neighbor. She wasn't interested in their sales pitch, either.

Yes, this whole thing could easily be scaled and franchised. Boomers are retiring like crazy now.

omni

 

[Danmar]

I'm not a restaurant person so these don't appeal to me. What I just realized, though, is that I rarely get them anymore. Two years ago I moved from a tony, shop-till-you-drop suburb with multiples of every major restaurant franchise, to a smaller house in a very nice area of suburb with more blue-collar demographics. Hmmmm. I guess they figure there's less money to be found in this Zip Code. Fine with me.

I’m in a similar situation. Move around so much they can’t find me. Get a lot of “financial junk mail” in Arizona though. Never even open it. Right from the mail box into the bin. Maybe there are invitations in there. Not sure. Have never attended a free anthything. I figure it’s worth what you pay for it.

 

[youbet]

Unlike a timeshare presentation, the pitch can't last much more than an hour.

No, it can last for eternity since they now have all your personal contact info and you're considered a hot prospect.

Personally, I try to avoid having commercial interests think I'm a good prospect and sharing my contact info with them. My mailbox, inbox, answering machine, etc., are already stuffed with that crap.

 

[jollystomper]

I get mainly mailings for these. but the free meal isn't much fun listening to a sales pitch. Now, if instead of a meal they offered cash... I might consider it.

 

[candrew]

If I need a free retirement meal I'll go to Costco with the rest of the buffet crowd.

I plead guilty.

 

[GravitySucks]

Went to one.
The lawyer that gave his pitch won my business.
Might go to another. Missed an offer to go to my favorite restaurant while traveling last month.

 

[audreyh1]

That is definitely part of it.

The problem is "free" is her favorite item on the menu, while I have always subscribed to the saying that "If you're not paying for something, then you're not the customer—you're the product being sold."

Hmmmm - yes for something "free" is a real magnet and their eyes light up.

I guess I never believe the "free" part because I see the costs - my time, the hassle, subjected to a pitch, etc. That's not free in my book.

What can you "pay" her NOT to go?

I'm a food snob. We eat super well at home, and so when we rarely go out it has to be top notch. So offers of food don't interest me - certainly not a chain restaurants that I don't frequent anyway. Specially not steakhouses as we cook primo steaks and sides at home.

 

[Elbata]

Those on this forum are smart enough to see through these come-ons. Of course they evolve and get more sophisticated and even the most skeptical can be taken in.

I learned this from the book "The Power of Persuasion": The way we're wired, when we're given something, we're expected to give something back. Hence, free meal, I'm now obligated to the person offering the free meal.

A more sophisticated one is this: Little girl girlscout
"Excuse me, would you like to donate $10 to Girlscouts?".
"No thank you".
"OK, thank you. Would you like to buy a candy bar?"

So what happens: An offer is made. Offer is rejected. The rejection is accepted, which is an acceptance of the rejector which becomes an offer within itself.

So now the original offerer makes another offer, but it's cheaper. Since the rejector of the first offer has had his rejected offer accepted, he's now obligated to accept the second offer.

Charlie Munger was so impressed with The Power of Persuasion, he gave the author a share of Berkshire stock.

Please, before I get flamed for being a scrooge and not donating to the Girl Scouts, I'm trying to use an example.

 

[JoeWras]

Please, before I get flamed for being a scrooge and not donating to the Girl Scouts, I'm trying to use an example.

That's OK, they wouldn't offer you a candy bar anyway. Maybe a cookie.

You are right about the "get free, give back" thing. This is the psychology around having people do reviews on websites who are compensated with free product.