since i made the decision to ER ppl are noticing im more relaxed

retiringat50

Recycles dryer sheets
Joined
Dec 31, 2007
Messages
79
very tense/stressed in Jan when I was deciding to ER in June (after 10yrs fulltime)
Saw friend yesterday who commented that I seem more relaxed now
Just making the decision has improved my health! wait till Im actually in ER
 
I am about 14 months away from retiring from my job of 25 years at 49 and finding it very hard to stay motivated/focused on my job since Jan this year -

There are many days I do feel much more relaxed seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and my mindset is often very different -

it's hard not to obsess over the future though, so many things I need to prep /plan for & so many opportunities to look forward to.
 
When I was approved for health insurance, my personality greatly improved. I knew the final hurdle to ER had been achieved. :D
 
Friends & family noticed that about us too when we retired. Within six months all were commenting on it.
 
My father R'd (as opposed to ER'd) a couple years back. The personality change was most noticeable (and for the better!)
 
I got that relaxed feeling after paying off the house in 2000. Allowed me to quit my corporate job in 2005 and follow my bliss.....sweet!
 
how sweet it is!!

Ahhh -- retiring in 4 months at the end of the school year -- have taught 18 years full time and about 10 combined part time in some fashion. I'll hit 55 in about 5 weeks so it is time -- DH will retire in about 16 months and then we hit the road in the RV. About 10 days ago I just knew it was time to say goodbye. We both want to enjoy the active years of retirement while we're young enough to make it count. More relaxed?? Must be -- several people have said i seem so upbeat -- I am!!
 
I'm a few years away, but what keeps me going on the terrible days at work is simply knowing that I could walk away now and probably be ok.
 
congrats on your decision.
the place looks totally different now, doesn't it?
just a short stretch ahead now...savor the fact that the EXIT sign has YOUR name on it! picture that every time you leave for the day.
 
I discovered how much more relaxed I became when I finally realized I was FI. The retiring part is more a logistical detail. I get 4 weeks of vacation, every Friday off (or get OT if I want to work) and can take unpaid leave (within "reason" - which I get to define based on what I tell my boss my work load is). My base pay is around $130,000. DW and I live on half of that. Life is sweet.

Congrats on coming over.
 
very tense/stressed in Jan when I was deciding to ER in June (after 10yrs fulltime)
Saw friend yesterday who commented that I seem more relaxed now
Just making the decision has improved my health! wait till Im actually in ER
In the Military I think it's akin to FYGMO...pardon the language (although there is a polite version), meant to convey the frame of mind only. Good on you...
 
Ahhh -- retiring in 4 months at the end of the school year -- have taught 18 years full time and about 10 combined part time in some fashion. I'll hit 55 in about 5 weeks so it is time -- DH will retire in about 16 months and then we hit the road in the RV. About 10 days ago I just knew it was time to say goodbye. We both want to enjoy the active years of retirement while we're young enough to make it count. More relaxed?? Must be -- several people have said i seem so upbeat -- I am!!

Congratulations on your retirement!
 
I am about 14 months away from retiring from my job of 25 years at 49 and finding it very hard to stay motivated/focused on my job since Jan this year -

There are many days I do feel much more relaxed seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and my mindset is often very different -

it's hard not to obsess over the future though, so many things I need to prep /plan for & so many opportunities to look forward to.


Feel the same way. 16 months away. Seems like an eternity.
 
I had a couple of friends from SoCA come up for a visit a couple of weeks ago and they both commented on how much more relaxed I have become. They said that they always had to pick up their pace to keep up with me while talking and walking. We went out to lunch and walked around the little goldrush town that I live in - they said - who are you and where is the real "Donzo"? It has been it has been 20 months since being freed and I don't notice a change in my behavior anymore - they only see me 2X per year - it was good to hear that the transition is still progressing!
Situations that used to set me off entertain me now - if I am stuck in a line at the store or resturant- I used to be the one huffing and puffing - now I get a kick out of watching the huffers and puffers.......
 
I'm 8 months away from ER. Still seems like a long way off, but it's beginning to seem real.

Feel like I'm starting to relax more as it gets closer:D. Some things and people at w*rk still bug me. And have a dog getting close to the end that weighs on me. But, when w*rk starts to get me down, I think that it will be over soon. Won't have to put up with the crap much longer, and worry about things like annual reviews. Also have another dog. That will help when Maxi is gone.

Looking forward to living for the things I want to do, not what the j*b demands.
 
My last day is next Friday (March 28), and I must say that I have felt so much more relaxed these last few weeks. My boss even comments on it at times, jokes about me not giving a crap about w*rk issues that used to be important to me. About a year out it seemed so far away, but the last few weeks have gone by very quickly for me.
 
For those that voluntarily ERed or in the process, how do you overcome the fear?

I have been thinking about it for a while but I am always worrying about (unable to overcome the fear of)

1. health insurance cost and its escalation, policy termination if excessively used (I am still healthy at 54 but do not know what future might bring).

2. Deprive myself and my wife of the luxuary of splurging on stuff and knowing that the next check is coming in a week to replace that sum of money spent (I am not living check to check - I believe I am FI). Losing the comfor and the security of having a pay check coming weekly is scary to me.

3. Running out of money, eventhough using Fidelity retirement planning program, I should be OK. Still have the fear.

4. Just a little concern about keeping busy, currently reading "how to retire happy, wild, and free".

Perhaps, for those that chose to ER, 100% your choice, can provide me advice of how to overcome my fear. I am assuming that you went through the same feelings during your decision making period.

Thanks in advance.

mP
 
For those that voluntarily ERed or in the process, how do you overcome the fear?

I have been thinking about it for a while but I am always worrying about (unable to overcome the fear of)
...

Perhaps, for those that chose to ER, 100% your choice, can provide me advice of how to overcome my fear. I am assuming that you went through the same feelings during your decision making period.

Thanks in advance.

mP

Welcome to the club. I also believe I am FI but I have convinced myself there's no reason to add the RE to my status due to a family situation. I have several friends that retired voluntarily that have now become filled with angst over the stock market gyrations. One has gone back to the full time workforce and the other is seriously considering it. I've tried to point out that their overall portfolios have not changed that much since the beginning of the year (down about 5 to 6%) but they see only a straight line down to zero. One guy's wife who he says had never paid attention to the stock market started to go nuts over the down days. She drove him back to work. Of course, things never got so bad that she considered looking for a j*b.

What do you do? You have to be allocated conservatively enough to sleep at night. You need to have faith in FIRECalc. You need enough cash/liquid assets to carry you through 5 or more years of stock market turmoil ala a "buckets strategy."

I do think it was very interesting watching my friends deal with the gyrating market. It's definitely easier to retire when the market is going up 10% or more a year. It's much harder to watch any gain slip away even though it should be expected based on market history.
 
For those that voluntarily ERed or in the process, how do you overcome the fear?

I will ER next year, so I suppose I am not quite in the process. Still, my nature is to be a worrier so maybe my answers will help.

I have been thinking about it for a while but I am always worrying about (unable to overcome the fear of)

1. health insurance cost and its escalation, policy termination if excessively used (I am still healthy at 54 but do not know what future might bring).

In my particular case, this will not be an issue since I chose to be a federal employee, which entails a lower salary with higher benefits. I will have lifetime medical.

2. Deprive myself and my wife of the luxuary of splurging on stuff and knowing that the next check is coming in a week to replace that sum of money spent (I am not living check to check - I believe I am FI). Losing the comfor and the security of having a pay check coming weekly is scary to me.

I plan to have a very conservative asset allocation (45:55 stocks:equities), plus I will have a tiny pension and social security check (eventually). I am planning on a 2% SWR instead of the conventional 4%. What I am thinking about doing is moving some money into a different account at the end of each year (enough to create a balance in that account that would amount to 2% of my entire portfolio). Then during the year I will move 1/12th of that into my checking account each month. If I spend less, I will probably only move enough to bring it up to 1/12th and save the excess.

This way I will be effectively paying myself a monthly paycheck, and I will know that I have plenty for the year with which to do that.

3. Running out of money, eventhough using Fidelity retirement planning program, I should be OK. Still have the fear.
Asset allocation is so important here, as is the fact that I know perfectly well that I can LBYM and get by on my pension and SS if I absolutely have to do that. Having my house paid off is a huge help for me in that it keeps me from worrying so much. I know that I have a place to live, and I know that SS & pension will give me enough to pay for utilities and food and more in the low cost-of-living area where I plan to retire.

I have a monthly expenditure goal that is considerably greater than what I have been spending during the past years. Subtracting my COLA'd social security and pension from this expenditure goal, I come to an amount that I need from my portfolio each month and from that figure out what I need each year. Because my AA is so conservative, I plan to begin ER with 45 times my yearly goal expenditures in cash/CDs/MM and TSP G-Fund, which I believe to be as secure as cash and should increase about as fast as the cost of living increases. The function of the equity funds that I have, will be to provide a balanced portfolio that can withstand a lot of stresses, inflation, and so on.

In other words, in my case it is overkill due to a recent windfall, plus tiny pension plus SS plus conservative AA plus a paid off house that will allow me to sleep peacefully in ER.

Well, other than inflation. That worries me a lot despite 45% equities. Also, changes to the tax structure or to SS worry me. But I seriously doubt that many retirees have the degree of overkill that I am planning. If I end up in trouble then things will be pretty grim for most retirees, and in fact for most people in the world.

As I become used to being a retiree, I will gradually ease into spending more. But I understand that the first 10 years are crucial so 2% SWR will ease my mind at the start.

4. Just a little concern about keeping busy, currently reading "how to retire happy, wild, and free".

Perhaps, for those that chose to ER, 100% your choice, can provide me advice of how to overcome my fear. I am assuming that you went through the same feelings during your decision making period.

Thanks in advance.

mP
I haven't read that book, and thanks for mentioning it. I probably should do that! One thing I am NOT worried about in the slightest, is finding plenty to do so that I don't get bored. As much of a worrier as I am, it is surprising to me that I don't worry about that. I am so curious about the universe and everything in it, that it would take me centuries to explore various facets of science, math, philosophy, and other areas of human endeavor that interest me.

I suppose I am in my decision making period but in my case, I am 99.9999% sure (though I must wait until 2009 for my lifetime medical).

Despite all the reassurances and safeguards the board has provided to me about Vanguard, I am still pretty nervous about having everything but my TSP in Vanguard. But at some point, one has to cut loose of these worries. I suppose that if I found a fund that I like in Fidelity, I might open an account over there and move 20% or so to Fidelity just to worry-proof my portfolio a little more. Probably won't, though.

Believe it or not, I actually worry that the management of Vanguard's Wellesley (where I have 30% of my portfolio) will start dropping acid and lose their minds, or just make bad investment choices. But even if they did, I still have the cash/CD/MM/TSP-G-Fund to rely on.
 
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For those that voluntarily ERed or in the process, how do you overcome the fear?

I have been thinking about it for a while but I am always worrying about (unable to overcome the fear of)

1. health insurance cost and its escalation, policy termination if excessively used (I am still healthy at 54 but do not know what future might bring).

2. Deprive myself and my wife of the luxuary of splurging on stuff and knowing that the next check is coming in a week to replace that sum of money spent (I am not living check to check - I believe I am FI). Losing the comfor and the security of having a pay check coming weekly is scary to me.

3. Running out of money, eventhough using Fidelity retirement planning program, I should be OK. Still have the fear.

4. Just a little concern about keeping busy, currently reading "how to retire happy, wild, and free".

Perhaps, for those that chose to ER, 100% your choice, can provide me advice of how to overcome my fear. I am assuming that you went through the same feelings during your decision making period.

Thanks in advance.

mP


I have health insurance from the government so that wasn't a worry . My biggest concerns were if I would stay busy enough , if I'd miss the social aspects of ny job and how to budget . I've stayed plenty busy . I started selling on ebay and amazon as a hobby , I started knitting and cross stitching again, I've taken a few courses , I've signed up for a beading class and I'm working on remodeling my house so I've really kept busy . As for the budget part I set it up like my paychecks . On the first of the month I receive my pension check and I also transfer a small amount from my money market . On the fifteenth I receive my SS survivor's benefit . This system works great for me . I also have a large excess in my budget for travel or whatever. I've been in the stock market for years so the gyrations annoy me but they don't make me lose any sleep . I did work a few extra years after I was FI until I was mentally ready to pull the trigger and believe me at that point I was ready . When you are truly ready financially and mentally you'll know it .Good Luck !
 
Welcome to the club. I also believe I am FI but I have convinced myself there's no reason to add the RE to my status due to a family situation. I have several friends that retired voluntarily that have now become filled with angst over the stock market gyrations. One has gone back to the full time workforce and the other is seriously considering it. I've tried to point out that their overall portfolios have not changed that much since the beginning of the year (down about 5 to 6%) but they see only a straight line down to zero. One guy's wife who he says had never paid attention to the stock market started to go nuts over the down days. She drove him back to work. Of course, things never got so bad that she considered looking for a j*b.

What do you do? You have to be allocated conservatively enough to sleep at night. You need to have faith in FIRECalc. You need enough cash/liquid assets to carry you through 5 or more years of stock market turmoil ala a "buckets strategy."

I do think it was very interesting watching my friends deal with the gyrating market. It's definitely easier to retire when the market is going up 10% or more a year. It's much harder to watch any gain slip away even though it should be expected based on market history.

Very true. The market makes me nervous too but I'll stick my head in a gas oven before I go back to work. :eek:

Even though I have been nervous, I do have a ladder of cd's and a fairly conservative mix 47/53 using the 100 rule. I know I have it laid out so i can ride this thing out and do just fine. But it is frustrating watching your balance go down. Human nature I guess. But as Brewer suggest, I have turned off the tv talking heads.

Time to pull out a book to read. No golf, raining here. :'(
 
Very true. The market makes me nervous too but I'll stick my head in a gas oven before I go back to work. :eek:

Even though I have been nervous, I do have a ladder of cd's and a fairly conservative mix 47/53 using the 100 rule. I know I have it laid out so i can ride this thing out and do just fine. But it is frustrating watching your balance go down. Human nature I guess. But as Brewer suggest, I have turned off the tv talking heads.

Time to pull out a book to read. No golf, raining here. :'(

Raining here, too. Sounds like a good day for you to read about golf, practice your swing in the garage or den, etc? :D

If you are 53, then I suppose you only have to make it through 9-13 more years until SS kicks in. Having a conservative AA is a huge help, and I know that personally I found that my fears and impulses to sell during down periods have really diminished since I went from 75/25 to 70/30 to 60/40 (during my accumulation phase) to my present pre-ER and ER AA of 45/55. I find the market to be very interesting, though like everyone I do get concerned at times!
 
I had a couple of friends from SoCA come up for a visit a couple of weeks ago and they both commented on how much more relaxed I have become. They said that they always had to pick up their pace to keep up with me while talking and walking. We went out to lunch and walked around the little goldrush town that I live in - they said - who are you and where is the real "Donzo"? It has been it has been 20 months since being freed and I don't notice a change in my behavior anymore - they only see me 2X per year - it was good to hear that the transition is still progressing!
Situations that used to set me off entertain me now - if I am stuck in a line at the store or resturant- I used to be the one huffing and puffing - now I get a kick out of watching the huffers and puffers.......

Even a year out from retirement, I feel that since I have "tenure" with a guaranteed future pension- I'm easier to deal with. Good to hear your story as a become what I feel is a more "likeable" person - easy going without the stress of work.
 
In my particular case, this will not be an issue since I chose to be a federal employee, which entails a lower salary with higher benefits. I will have lifetime medical.

I don't want to offend you but my experience with "lower salary" claims by Federal workers is a pile of crap. It does seem to be a "chant" of this class of workers bemoaning their lot in life.

I worked as a government contractor and most of the civil servants I interacted with would have been run off in short order by the private sector companies I was with.

All my peers made far less than the civil servants and did their "function" which they "managed." Most were clueless or worse. Some of the high level government people may be able to make big bucks on the outside but the typical civil servant was over paid IMHO.

Being a civil servant bestows upon the retiree massive benefits that are adjusted for inflation. Working for decades as a contractor qualifies you to die broke. There is no pension except for the wonderful amount of social security.

My rant is based on repeatedly overhearing civil servants crying that they won't be able to retire until they are 55 and they just don't know how they'll survive on their pension. They usually did this in front of numerous contractors (the ones that must be making far more money since they weren't civil servants) that had no pensions and no job security. Most of these overpaid contractors hoped to work until 65 or later unless a merciful God took them sooner.

As for lifetime medical.... You've got to be kidding.
 
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