Age old issue: the transition from saver to spender

[LARS]

Not anything terribly new here, but the very fact that these stories get written continually says you're not alone if this still rattles around your head from time to time...

Feeling guilty about spending savings in retirement - Jun. 15, 2016


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[jazz4cash]

It's not exactly guilt. It's a feeling I can't describe kinda like this feels too good to be true so something must be wrong. But I am enjoying the freedom. Thanks for the link. Maybe it will help me reduce my uneasiness.


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[rodi]

I know I'm having issues with this. Since I'm just 2 years into retirement... I worry about overspending... even though the calculators say I'm fine.

 

[Major Tom]

The gentleman who wrote the question in the article said that he feels guilty about spending money on anything fun. I think that's a fairly common feeling among some particularly frugal retirees. They amassed their savings, in part, by strictly limiting expenditure on the discretionary "fun" stuff. It's only natural that spending fun money in retirement would represent a shift in thinking.

Notice how I used the word "they" so as to help create the impression this is an effect that happens to others

PS - I used the retirement calculator on that page, just for fun, and it informed me that my retirement age was too low, based on my birth year. Apparently, there is some "rule" thatt retirement is not allowed before the age of 55. Now they tell me!

 

[travelover]

I have plenty to live on, but I do wonder what my / DW's long term care costs will be.

 

[LARS]

Notice how I used the word "they" so as to help create the impression this is an effect that happens to others

Pogo said it best: we have met the enemy and he is us! ;-)


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[Bamaman]

We're not the enemy. In our case, it's our kids.

 

[LARS]

I suspect for the vast majority here the high likelihood is that they will die with "too much" as opposed to "too little". I would also add that for the vast majority here that is not seen as a problem (for varying reasons).

From my personal perspective I'd like to end up with the proverbial porridge so to speak: not too little, but not too much.


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[daylatedollarshort]

We have a house full of stuff we are trying to declutter and there are lots of fun (to us) free or cheap things to do in our area so I don't see any reason to spend more just because we can. If we don't need it for medical costs, LTC or some unforeseen circumstances it can go to the kids and charity.

 

[W2R]

I think it's a problem (though I have had worse).

All my life, the goal was to spend less. Now, the objective is different and a bit unfamiliar.

Working on it... Bought this insanely wonderful Dream House last year, just before the real estate bubble began here.

Now what? OK, regrouping first to check and make sure I can afford more than cat food and a refrigerator box under a bridge. It appears that all is well so far. I love my dream house so much that I don't need to spend much to be happy. Just wish I was 20-40 years younger, oh well.

 

[W2R]

The gentleman who wrote the question in the article said that he feels guilty about spending money on anything fun. I think that's a fairly common feeling among some particularly frugal retirees.

I agree completely.

Personally spending inspires fear more than guilt. This must be what skydiving is like.

 

[Music Lover]

All my life, the goal was to spend less. Now, the objective is different and a bit unfamiliar.

That's how I look at it. Guilt has little to do with it...it's the changing of a lifelong and ingrained habit/mindset of frugality and saving.

I complained a week ago of spending an easily affordable amount of money on a music gear purchase. I finally did buy it, but it took me a week to pull the trigger. I had all the same old thoughts: Do I really need it? Is it an improvement over what I already have? Is it worth the money? Etc.

 

[Amethyst]

We are finding that the cost of having anything done for us is rising quite rapidly enough that we don't worry about under-spending.

 

[LARS]

We are finding that the cost of having anything done for us is rising quite rapidly enough that we don't worry about under-spending.

Try telling that to the Federal Reserve...


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[rayinpenn]

A little bit of worry is a good thing... There's a young guy on YouTube wife, young daughter. He's cashing in his Ira to buy a sailboat and go cruising. Search sailboat story in YouTube if you're interested.. I find it amazing people will cast off on a shoe string...

Perhaps we could bottle our conservative money ways and sell it.


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[LARS]

Perhaps we could bottle our conservative money ways and sell it.


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You'd go broke trying to sell "it". The ones that get it, don't need it; and, the ones that need it, don't realize they need it until it's too late.


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[rayinpenn]

You'd go broke trying to sell "it". The ones that get it, don't need it; and, the ones that need it, don't realize they need it until it's too late.


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Your right but I'm thinking the buyer wouldn't be the one needing and getting the dose...
Hey young big spender Be careful what is in your morning orange juice..


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[Eileen]

'transition' issue

I agree completely.

Personally spending inspires fear more than guilt. This must be what skydiving is like.

yes, I am sorry that even though this is my first retiree weekend, I already have a touch of this uh... 'fear' you speak of. It is there. I am going to studiously ignore it and just say I am a sensible person and will leave it at that. E.

 

[growerVon]

yes, I am sorry that even though this is my first retiree weekend, I already have a touch of this uh... 'fear' you speak of. It is there. I am going to studiously ignore it and just say I am a sensible person and will leave it at that. E.

Back when I was [-]picking beans in Guatemala[/-] partying at the Starlight Mountain festival in '94, I saw a poster on the inside of a converted old-school milk van, now hippy mobile, that spelled out F.E.A.R as:
Forgetting
Everything's
All
Right

I know the reluctance to spend after accumulation is real and do not mean to belittle it, but perhaps it may help to remember the above F.E.A.R. acronym.

 

[marko]

I wonder if it's a matter of time and getting used to it.

After 11 years of ER, I'm just starting to relax and slowly coming to realize that "we're going to make it just fine". Like many, we started out RE spending quite carefully but over time you start spending just a little more and it all works out.

My general touchstone is having all the bills paid and ending up at year's end with more in the portfolio than when the year began (2008 excepted).

After a while (11 years might be overly cautious) you slowly come to the realization that 'yeah....we're good'

 

[papadad111]

A little bit of worry is a good thing... There's a young guy on YouTube wife, young daughter. He's cashing in his Ira to buy a sailboat and go cruising. Search sailboat story in YouTube if you're interested.. I find it amazing people will cast off on a shoe string...

Perhaps we could bottle our conservative money ways and sell it.


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Actually that guy is gonna write a blog or do a video blog and he'll be ok.

Its possibly Bruno's brother, Franco

 

[papadad111]

The fear is real.
Experience and time seem to help.
First year of FiRE has been very fiscally conservative for me.

Finally I'm starting to spend -- my airline freq flier miles, my hotel points , and the stash of gift cards.

It's like I am going through the spending motions ..training myself to spend a little ... but without it hurting the wallet so much or triggering the guilt and fear sensors the same way.

It's been fun ...

 

[garyt]

I'm not even retired yet and I'm having the problem. I'm working way less hours and even looking to go to 4 days a week and the lower income (which also means less deposited into 401k) is a little disconcerting even though I know I don't need the money.
It's tough to overcome a lifetime of discipline.

 

[Markola]

+1. I'm still a w*rking stiff and would love to FIRE but WHEN I finally reach FI, now I have to worry about being afraid to spend any money while also avoiding OMY Syndrome, not to mention quitting way before all my friends and family do. Yeesh! At least I was warned. Seriously, I might be a candidate for ramping down to part time before going cold turkey, just to earn fun money and keep momentum toward my goal of FIRE. I've also read stories about depression that can develop from denying oneself their deserved reward. It's a minefield out there apparently!

 

[LuckyDog]

DW and I have increased our spending somewhat, but have come to grips with the fact that we are savers and not spenders. We have what we need and realize that it does not take a lot to make us happy. DW and I are at peace with that...