Can you really enjoy retirement if it was someone else's decision?

[splitwdw]

Couldn't have said it better.


Edit: Deleted the rest. This guy sounds exactly like the troll "Forced to Retire", and I'm not playing that game again.

+1 Maybe I'm getting cynical but I thought this sounded like "Forced to Retire" too...

 

[Helen]

+1 Maybe I'm getting cynical but I thought this sounded like "Forced to Retire" too...

I wonder if they were posting from work?

 

[NW-Bound]

Well, recently I happened to recall a thread by Forced to Retire, where he asked for help with terminating an expensive apartment lease, and I wondered what happened next.

So, I just looked and saw that he started more threads, with the latest one about getting $1M inheritance. I missed that one and a couple more.

 

[fritz]

My friends and relatives who really enjoy retirement the most are people who leave the workforce after a long and successful career and do it on the date of their choosing.

They feel proud of their career and life accomplishments, have a nice retirement party at work, get all kinds of compliments about how great they are and feel like they really added value to their employer and profession.

Other friends and relatives who are retired are bitter, bored and frustrated. Their employer kicked them out without any warning or praise. Their ex coworkers ignore social offers and they felt they still had things to offer the workforce, but employers disagreed.

Could you enjoy your retirement if you were pushed out before you were ready, even if you had enough money to retire and were over 60?

Retired 7 years now (retired at 58). Left comfort of mega corp (no pensions - just 401Ks) for a start-up company before retiring. I was well aware of the huge risk and start-up company went bankrupt back in 2009 (horrible economy didn't help). No regrets - how many opportunities does one get to work for a start-up company. I would do it again, and I still do part-time consulting for resurrected old/new start up company. I/we had enough saved for retirement when it went under (actually before I left mega corp) and I decided to retire. Wife joined me following year.

Scariest thing for most retirees IMHO, is that march into oblivion where you're just another retired person out during the day. I don't see that fear limited to those that didn't get the gold watch send off. There's a movie you should pick up at your local library titled "About Schmidt". Jack Nicholson does a great job as Warren Schmidt - who is retiring after a lifetime of service as an actuary for Woodmen of the World Insurance Company. It addresses your first two paragraphs above about lifetime career retirement send-offs rather humorously.

I see being bitter or happy in retirement as a choice - not dependent on whether you were tossed or partied out...

 

[Bestwifeever]

Damn but you guys have some good troll radar! You are probably right.

I think the traditional idea of the long career with one company and a gold watch and a party at retirement doesn't exist for the most part any more, at least in the private sector, so the transition is probably more personal than employer-driven. It is probably important from a cultural/psychological standpoint to have some rite of passage for this big life change, like we have birthday parties for children, weddings (courthouse or otherwise), graduations, baby showers, etc., but like the other events, it's not up to the employer to do it for most people. If one is surprised into retirement, nothing's stopping you from having your own party if you want one!

 

[Bamaman]

Our MegaCorp retired everyone 55 years old and older in 2008--overreacting to the economic times. Believe me that MegaCorp paid us dearly in vacation, severance pay, health insurance and a supplement payments to age 62. And drawing unemployment for almost a year was great.

The company was very scared of litigation, and there were no going away parties or gold watches given out. We in the field were given one day's notice. Those in the home office had security guards show up at their desk, and ushered out with 5 minutes notice.

Big companies are often heartless. But it was all business, and nothing personal. I'd prepared myself fiscally and physically for that day for quite sometime, as 36 1/2 years was long enough.

 

[Act2]

Think back - you've probably had several major events in life and your career, some you planned/wanted, others just happened. I can think of several, some not of my choosing and not what I'd wanted. But they all worked out, probably better than if I hadn't experienced them.

So, yes.

 

[UnrealizedPotential]

This is a big part of the reason for my saving for retirement. I wanted to go out on my terms. It would be horrible to be let go from a job or demoted and you had not prepared for that outcome. I saw the handwriting on the wall years ago and knew the storm was coming. So I prepared and watched and waited. I left earlier than what I had planned but I am doing fine. Just fine, and I am glad I had prepared for the inevitable.

 

[marko]

Personally, I could enjoy it. How you approach life, your happiness, etc... are largely part of your attitude and how you *choose* to deal with what life gives you.

If you're laid off... you can whine and play the victim... or you can look for the positive.

The ones who are unhappy are choosing to focus on the negative and be unhappy.

I loved every minute of my job and made really good money; RE never entered my mind. But when the company was sold (and I was considered redundant) I realized that things wouldn't be the same anyway, so, make lemonade out of lemons.

Got an insanely generous severance and spent a few months skiing the Alps before discovering that I liked NOT working even more!

 

[foxfirev5]

I made a valiant effort to get a severance package. But alas it was not ment to be. Only the highly motivated slackers were able to pull this off.
So I took the high road and ended my career on my terms. Not as profitable but satisfying none the less.
In hindsight it would have worked either way. Retirement is too good to waste it looking back!

 

[marko]

Retirement is too good to waste it looking back!

Now here is my vote for the RE 'Quote of the Year'!

 

[brett]

Yes I could. In fact, I have done so for the past four, almost five years.

I would have been happy to work another 2 years. We were financially prepared. I wanted a package. It was very common in my industry and who wants to walk away from a golden handshake.

Circumstances changed and the package came. I was much more thrilled with the prospect of a nice package than I was of the thought of leaving a little early. The former dulled the latter by a very long shot.

Never did any consulting or part time work. Just left and never looked back. Sold the house and traveled. Still at at. It is wonderful.

 

[FI_RElater]

Anecdotal evidence: brother was last one out after the location was closed-- had good pension but for whatever reason couldn't get over being let go after over 30 years. Still is somewhat bitter. A sister left on somewhat better terms-- but still not ideal-- after retirement plan changed. (It would have been crazy to stay/benefits would have been cut even with more years in)
Me, we saved like crazy, and had reached FI but needed the slightly longer time to get health benefits in retirement.
I also opted to not have a retirement party/ I was leaving at the end of year so many people would have been gone and the few I kept up with have my info, the rest can't afford my rates in RE.

 

[chris2008]

My Dad was let go in his mid50s and suffered from it for the rest of his life. Financially my parents were ok, but he could not see the blessing in disguise.

I watched it just starting my career and it changed my attitude. Never tie your self worth to a job. A company cannot love back. It is good as long as it is but can change quickly.
I still loved working but when I found YMYL it clicked and I ERed 3 years ago at 55.

 

[Major Tom]

Never tie your self worth to a job. A company cannot love back. It is good as long as it is but can change quickly.

Completely agree. I was propelled into ER by a layoff due to the fact that my company went out of business. My self-worth wasn't entirely tied to the job, but I did derive a fair degree of satisfaction (and a little bit of my identity) from it. There was something strangely unsettling about the fact that the organization that had been such a mainstay of my life for 16 years no longer existed. It had no physical location that I could go back to. Employee records, archives of meetings, business plans, ad campaigns etc have most likely long been shredded and recycled.

It's all gone.

But I'm still here

 

[Danmar]

Completely agree. I was propelled into ER by a layoff due to the fact that my company went out of business. My self-worth wasn't entirely tied to the job, but I did derive a fair degree of satisfaction (and a little bit of my identity) from it. There was something strangely unsettling about the fact that the organization that had been such a mainstay of my life for 16 years no longer existed. It had no physical location that I could go back to. Employee records, archives of meetings, business plans, ad campaigns etc have most likely long been shredded and recycled.

It's all gone.

But I'm still here

Yes. Agree it is better not to tie up too much of your phsyche in your job. However, for those in executive positions this is really necessary to succeed. It's how your react after retirement that is key. Ie you need to get over it ASAP. Took me maybe 3 years.

 

[Big_Hitter]

Could you enjoy your retirement if you were pushed out before you were ready, even if you had enough money to retire and were over 60?

enjoy? I'd probably slit my wrists if I was still doing this at 60. Life is too short.

 

[Amethyst]

Funniest answer prize!

No way would I give them the satisfaction of seeing me happy. I'd be bitter, angry and miserable until I died. Then they'd be sorry.

 

[Amethyst]

I think it's That Poster, too. Everybody gets peeved at this poster, but s/he does start the most interesting threads, even if with hypocritical motives.

In my view, it's not quite like true trolls, who make provocative comments in hopes of setting everyone by the ears.

+1 Maybe I'm getting cynical but I thought this sounded like "Forced to Retire" too...

 

[bclover]

My friends and relatives who really enjoy retirement the most are people who leave the workforce after a long and successful career and do it on the date of their choosing.

They feel proud of their career and life accomplishments, have a nice retirement party at work, get all kinds of compliments about how great they are and feel like they really added value to their employer and profession.

Other friends and relatives who are retired are bitter, bored and frustrated. Their employer kicked them out without any warning or praise. Their ex coworkers ignore social offers and they felt they still had things to offer the workforce, but employers disagreed.

Could you enjoy your retirement if you were pushed out before you were ready, even if you had enough money to retire and were over 60?

ABSOLUTELY! but here's the thing. As others have stated, My self worth was and never will be tied to a job.

LOL in fact It's my belief that all youngins should have to work two types of jobs. 1) fast food/service job and 2) mega corporation.

The mega corporation job will quickly let you know that you are not all that important. they can, have and will continuing to operate in the best interest of the shareholders and don't give a crap about the employees.

My employer gave me my "please go away quietly" papers April of 2106. It took me all of 5 minutes to breathe a sigh of relief.

Maybe their coworkers decline social invitations because they whine all the time? who the heck wants to have lunch with someone complaining non stop?

 

[RunningBum]

I think it's That Poster, too. Everybody gets peeved at this poster, but s/he does start the most interesting threads, even if with hypocritical motives.

In my view, it's not quite like true trolls, who make provocative comments in hopes of setting everyone by the ears.

I think most people got angry when the person had that long, drawn out thread about being tied to an apartment, unable to get any kind of job anywhere, with a bunch of excuses why he couldn't things a lot of people suggested, then it all turned out to be a sham. I wouldn't have been surprised if he'd have turned this thread into the same thing, given a chance.

 

[brett]

Downsizing, employee terminations at all levels is so very common these days. And it has been for many years. I worked in an industry that started downsizing and offshoring in the very early 90's and is still doing it.

I think the trick is to understand that any employee/executive can and will be replaced at some point. Perhaps for performance, compensation issues, or changes in business direction.

I was prepared for downsizing and was 'waiting' for it since I did not want to leave without a package. It is such a great way to start an early retirement.

Still, I know some former colleagues who were downsized years ago. One in particular, years later, will still never purchase any products from his former employer, or successor company. This bitterness shows and I feel sorry for him. People tend to forget, it is just business nothing more. This can be difficult to do when you have progressed through the ranks for so long. But there comes a point, I believe, where the higher you are in management the more risk there is that your employer will say goodbye and good luck.

 

[Big_Hitter]

I think it's That Poster, too. Everybody gets peeved at this poster, but s/he does start the most interesting threads, even if with hypocritical motives.

In my view, it's not quite like true trolls, who make provocative comments in hopes of setting everyone by the ears.

isn't there a rule against multiple accounts?

 

[W2R]

Let's try to turn the conversation back to the subject matter of this thread, "Can you really enjoy retirement if it was someone else's decision?", and away from past or future moderator actions. We do our best to make the forum a pleasant place to post, and beyond that we have a policy of not discussing what consequences any member may or may not have incurred. We base our actions on the Community Rules, which everyone here is encouraged to review often.

 

[MRG]

I think most people got angry when the person had that long, drawn out thread about being tied to an apartment, unable to get any kind of job anywhere, with a bunch of excuses why he couldn't things a lot of people suggested, then it all turned out to be a sham. I wouldn't have been surprised if he'd have turned this thread into the same thing, given a chance.

Yes it's like trying to help someone solve an issue only to learn the time you invested was a sick joke.

No different if you saw a sick homeless person and gave them a twenty, only to find out their homes nicer than yours!