Am I crazy for wanting cosmetic surgery?

[latexman]

Some friend! Then again, women have something similar. Certain women with big boobs like to josh smaller-busted ones. I had a good retort for that one, but it was a bit more personal than yours

DW’s BFF 40 years ago would say, “they may be small, but . . . they are sensitive”.

 

[pb4uski]

I would be terrified that the procedure goes wrong and I'm left crippled in some way.

Crazy no. If you want it and have thought through any possible negative outcomes it's a BTD....

... Personally, I view any surgery as something that is serious and a last resort so I would not do it. ...

As a nurse, I do everything possible to stay out of the hospital or needing surgical intervention. ...

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

While perhaps you can have modern medicine change your height, I don't think it is a wise choice. It seems pretty risky to me so I wouldn't do it.

I peaked at about 5' 7-1/2" so I have always been towards the short side, but I have a few fellow men in my life who are even shorter than I am. To be honest, I hardly ever give any thought at all to my or others height.

I suggest that you change your mindset and not your height.

 

[latexman]

What do you all think? Am I crazy or should I do what I think might increase my happiness by 30-40%?

1 year and ~$100k for 2”?

Oh, hell no!

 

[Sojourner]

No one cares how tall you are, except you. Goes for cars, too...no one cares what you drive.

+1
This is one of the most important things about life that most people don't fully realize. People are highly self-absorbed, and no one cares all that much about what you're doing (or how tall you are, or how nice your house is, or how rich you are, etc.). They may care briefly, when you're in the same room talking to them, but once they leave their interest in your life pretty much vanishes until the next time they interact with you. And even then, it's a much lower level of interest and care than most of us think it is.

To the OP's question, the only way I'd consider having extremely expensive, complicated leg-lengthening surgery at age 50 would be if it would fix a tangible, substantial medical problem (such as pain while walking, or spinal issues, etc.). I would not do it purely for cosmetic reasons.

 

[garyt]

Just curious, if you wear shoes that give you two more inches in height, do you really notice a difference? I can’t imagine that 2 inches would change your prospective enough to be worth the risk/cost/discomfort of surgery . . .

Personally, I view any surgery as something that is serious and a last resort so I would not do it. Also, in retirement, your life will be different. Maybe wait a couple years and see if it still matters.

That's my thought. If the OP is really short, like 5', is 2" going to make a difference? Or where would it make a difference? At 5'2" going to 5'4"? I'd imagine 5'4" going to 5'6" would get you to a relatively average height.
I can think of where 2" might make a difference but that's a whole 'nother topic.

 

[garyt]

No one cares how tall you are, except you. Goes for cars, too...no one cares what you drive.

I would definitely say that's not true. Some women definitely care and won't consider a short guy. Lots of studies show less attractive people don't get jobs even when more accomplished then more attractive people.
Probably lots of jokes through the years about his height also from buddies growing up. I'd imagine it can be tough.
We had a couple really short guys in our group of friends (think like 5' even maybe 5'2")and both had what we called "Little man's disease". Very agrressive at sports trying to prove themselves and one got all pumped up at body building to an extreme.

 

[rt-texas]

So all my life I've always wanted just one thing and now that I'm about to retire comfortably, I'm starting to think that I should just get it over with....so I can actually enjoy life at a taller height. I heard about this procedure https://leglengtheningsurgery.com/ from an old friend of mine who had one leg shorter than the other...but I guess you can do it to get taller too.

I'm going to be 50 soon, but I think I still have 20-30 good years ahead of me and quite frankly, I'm tired of looking up to others and see this similar to a face lift or something. My spouse is fully supportive, it'd only take about a year for 2 inches, and less than 100K or so. I'm fully aware of the risks and it's always bothered me

What do you all think? Am I crazy or should I do what I think might increase my happiness by 30-40%?

5'6" with DW who's only 5' nothing as I like to say.

When I was young, early 1970's, there was discussions with doc's about giving me hormones to help me be grow taller, parents didn't do it. My nephew had them during puberty, was always shorter than everybody his age including the girls. He's now 5'9" app.

I would consider doing something like this for a young man approaching puberty to "help" nature along it's course.

I wouldn't ever remotely consider surgery at my age to try and accommodate a few more inches in my height. So many things that could go wrong that could affect my quality of life for my time left. Just my two cents worth from someone who is short. Also, broken bones flippin hurt, and not just for a few days. I know this from experience and racing motorcycles.

Do what makes you happy but...please make certain you know what your signing up for.

 

[aaronc879]

No one cares how tall you are, except you. Goes for cars, too...no one cares what you drive.

Not true that no one cares what you drive but no one that matters cares what you drive. No one that matters will care what your height is either.

 

[W2R]

Frank is about 5'4". I'm 5'9". He is the love of my life, my hero, my sweetie, and he has stood by me and protected me for decades. He literally saved my life more than once. Not only that, he has many other fine attributes.

He's a confident, accomplished, brilliant, strikingly handsome guy, too active and involved in life to get hung up on inferiority feelings due to something as trivial as height. Do you think I give a hoot about his height? Answer is "nope", of course not. He doesn't either. He is of Welsh ancestry and likes to say, "My people measure height from the neck up" (referring to intelligence).

I'd suggest that you invest some serious work on improving your self image before you spend $100K to have someone hack on your perfectly good body.

 

[swakyaby]

I’ve seen plenty of surgeries for cosmetic procedures as well as their initial post op recovery, mainly soft tissue procedures like face lifts, breast augmentation, liposuctions, and rhinoplasties. In the hands of a competent and experienced plastic surgeon, the post op discomfort is manageable and complication rate is low. But leg lengthening seems completely different in that breaking perfectly normal bones and gradually stretching nerves, blood vessels, skin, until the bones reach the desired length seems incredibly painful. You couldn’t pay me to have this kind of procedure for purely cosmetic reasons. Therapy for body dysmorphia seems like money better spent.

 

[Calico]

I’ve seen plenty of surgeries for cosmetic procedures as well as their initial post op recovery, mainly soft tissue procedures like face lifts, breast augmentation, liposuctions, and rhinoplasties. In the hands of a competent and experienced plastic surgeon, the post op discomfort is manageable and complication rate is low. But leg lengthening seems completely different in that breaking perfectly normal bones and gradually stretching nerves, blood vessels, skin, until the bones reach the desired length seems incredibly painful. You couldn’t pay me to have this kind of procedure for purely cosmetic reasons. Therapy for body dysmorphia seems like money better spent.

^^^^This.

 

[CSdot]

Can't imagine ever wanting to do something so drastic.

 

[aja8888]

The funny thing is when you get old enough you start losing height. My DW used to be 5'8" now she is 5'5". And I lost an inch down to 5'10".

Our shoe sizes are the same though!

 

[astronet7]

I’ve seen plenty of surgeries for cosmetic procedures as well as their initial post op recovery, mainly soft tissue procedures like face lifts, breast augmentation, liposuctions, and rhinoplasties. In the hands of a competent and experienced plastic surgeon, the post op discomfort is manageable and complication rate is low. But leg lengthening seems completely different in that breaking perfectly normal bones and gradually stretching nerves, blood vessels, skin, until the bones reach the desired length seems incredibly painful. You couldn’t pay me to have this kind of procedure for purely cosmetic reasons. Therapy for body dysmorphia seems like money better spent.

There's a lot of great points here and I have read this book, gone to therapy, tried meds, and various other solutions. The thing is, I think I have more of a dypshoria rather than dysmorphia. From what I read on ncbi https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8121106/, it seems like those with minor dysphoria can actually improve their happiness and those with dysMorphia will always feel inadequate.

I do think 2 inches will help my mental state though. I know everyone isn't judged on height, but it's true, I have let it consume my mind. The whole hedonistic set point thing might be true and heel lifts kind of work, but I just want it to be permanent.

I might wait another year or two to see if I can get over it. Maybe it's just a mid-life crisis but it's been on my mind since hearing about it 5+ years ago

 

[Sojourner]

Some women definitely care and won't consider a short guy. Lots of studies show less attractive people don't get jobs even when more accomplished then more attractive people.

True, but OP is 50 years old and already married. One would think (and hope) that a fully grown, married, settled man entering the mid/later stages of life would not be preoccupied with how others perceive his somewhat below-average height. I think that if OP does go ahead with the surgery, he will find that being 2" taller only gives him a temporary boost in happiness and life-satisfaction. He will discover that height is a pretty minor factor in the grand scheme of things that make up a happy (or unhappy) life, IMHO.

 

[KCGeezer]

Most of my family is shorter than average. Never heard of this procedure but it seems to be an awfully big risk for questionable reward IMO.

My dad told me long ago ‘as long as your feet reach the ground you’re tall enough’.

 

[Aerides]

I think the thread framing is telling - this is not remotely what anyone would consider "cosmetic" surgery. This is major surgery. Even if all goes well it would upend your life considerably for a year, and being over 50, recovery will be worse than any cases you read about.

 

[4legsgood]

Don't do it. Don't risk your health pursuing the illusion that a more proportionate body will make you happier. A couple inches in height isn't going to change your life, and huge health risk and physical pain There are probably things you could do for that kind of money that would change your life, thinking some new cool hobbies or once in a lifetime trip. That's my opinion.

 

[tmm99]

I don't know what it feels like to be extremely short. I'm from Japan and 5'5 (female). The average height for my age group is around 5'1. I have some Japanese friends in the US and most of them are short. Some are (both men and women) are extremely short by the US standard. One friend who is not even 5' complained to me one time that some people at work treated her as if she was someone very young, probably because of her height. I don't think adding 2 inches to her height would have done much, as her height would have been 5' instead of 4'10".

Maybe you can find a pair of shoes that can give you an extra inch or two and see if the world looks any different? People do dangerous/expensive surgeries all the time to enhance their looks, to feel better, like liposuction, breast argumentation, pec implants, etc. Personally, the possible risk of something going wrong outweighs my wanting to change. If I could wake up 2 inches taller with no risks without having to pay a load, I would do it, as I'm a volleyball player and I could jump 2 inches higher to block. I think I need to do more strength training to increase my jumping ability instead, though.

 

[Sunset]

I would not do it, because the risk is big , the pain and expense are not trivial, and the possibility to be in a wheelchair afterwards would be horrible.

My eyes are not great, but I'd rather have what I got, then do laser surgery and possibly go blind. I know some folks that it turned out great, some that have halos, and 1 that years later has to put drops in the eyes... Not everybody after surgery is 100% success.

Surgery has lots of risks, might be taller and walk with pain.

Nobody has commented on it but, 2" in height is not a big change, 2" lower down, would be a big change for most folks.

I've seen tall folks, most have some other problem, like big nose, ugly, bad attitude, lousy marriage, criminal kids, stupidity, etc...
OP might be able to "fix" the 2" which won't last due to aging, but then people will just focus on other issues.

 

[swakyaby]

Actually, this is cosmetic surgery because it’s being considered for purely cosmetic reasons instead of treating a functional issue. Not all cosmetic surgery is minor.

 

[Sue J]

Just curious, would the 2 inches of new bone be as strong as the 50 year old bones that it's holding together? Or stronger? What are the extra risks in a fall or a front end car accident?

About height-ism - I have female acquaintance who is 5'10". Her first criteria for a date is he has to be at least 6' tall. I find this very shallow. Maybe her perfect soulmate is 5'8". She'll never know! She is single at age 45.

 

[pb4uski]

.... Some women definitely care and won't consider a short guy. ....

And why would any guy, short or not, be interested in a woman that shallow?

My aunt was over 6" taller than my uncle... and she is a gem.

 

[braumeister]

FWIW, one of the great loves of my life (before I met DW) was a girl who was two inches taller. She didn't have any problem with that, and I think most women probably wouldn't.

 

[F.I.R.E User]

I am 5’10” and use 3” soles.