There was an article in the Houston Chronicle today about elder abuse. It started off with the typical sad story of a 70 yr old woman whose son sold off all of her possessions and she now lives in an empty house.
It got me thinking. Many of us on this board have, are or will be taking care of elder parents. Unfortunately, the mind is frequently the first thing that goes if they make it to their 70s. I can see where even a well meaning child can get cross-ways with an elderly parent.
My FIL has Alzheimer's (or Vascular Degeneration as DW likes to say) and is in an assisted living facility. He still has a good deal of cognizant ability but is well past managing anything financial. DW and I are in the process of selling off his assets to pay for his and MIL's care (she's in a nursing home with Parkinson's & dementia). Our recent milestone was selling his 2003 Escalade he bought for close to full list price and had a wonderful loan to go with it. We got just enough to pay off the loan.
While trying to get his signature to sell his car, he got angry and said "he didn't want any of his things sold without his permission and he isn't giving it. Now or ever!" He also said there would be serious consequences if he found out anyone had.
We managed to sell the car without committing fraud but the plan is not to tell him we did. We're also about to have an estate sale to clean out their house. The house will then, hopefully, be put on the market as soon as my tormented DW can muster the courage.
So, I'm waiting for him to find out from one of his well meaning friends. Many of whom don't seem much better off mentally than he is but they're still living at home and driving the roads. When that happens, I expect the police to get a call.
Get ready boys and girls. If it hasn't already happened, it will. Just hope you're not the sibling that lives the closest although I've heard stories of sons living in the same town refusing to do anything and forcing dear sister to come in from two states away.
It got me thinking. Many of us on this board have, are or will be taking care of elder parents. Unfortunately, the mind is frequently the first thing that goes if they make it to their 70s. I can see where even a well meaning child can get cross-ways with an elderly parent.
My FIL has Alzheimer's (or Vascular Degeneration as DW likes to say) and is in an assisted living facility. He still has a good deal of cognizant ability but is well past managing anything financial. DW and I are in the process of selling off his assets to pay for his and MIL's care (she's in a nursing home with Parkinson's & dementia). Our recent milestone was selling his 2003 Escalade he bought for close to full list price and had a wonderful loan to go with it. We got just enough to pay off the loan.
While trying to get his signature to sell his car, he got angry and said "he didn't want any of his things sold without his permission and he isn't giving it. Now or ever!" He also said there would be serious consequences if he found out anyone had.
We managed to sell the car without committing fraud but the plan is not to tell him we did. We're also about to have an estate sale to clean out their house. The house will then, hopefully, be put on the market as soon as my tormented DW can muster the courage.
So, I'm waiting for him to find out from one of his well meaning friends. Many of whom don't seem much better off mentally than he is but they're still living at home and driving the roads. When that happens, I expect the police to get a call.
Get ready boys and girls. If it hasn't already happened, it will. Just hope you're not the sibling that lives the closest although I've heard stories of sons living in the same town refusing to do anything and forcing dear sister to come in from two states away.