How Cold Is It? An Annotated Thermometer by Don Haugen, Pensacola Austin-Healey Club 60º Californians put on sweaters (if they can find them). 50º Miami residents turn on the heat. 40º You can see your breath. Californians shiver uncontrollably. Minnesotans go swimming. 35º Italian cars won't start. 32º Water freezes. 30º You plan your vacation to Australia. Minnesotans put on T-shirts. Politicians begin to worry about the homeless. English cars won't start. 25º Boston water freezes. Californians weep pitiably. Minnesotans eat ice cream. Canadians go swimming. 20º You can hear your breath. Politicians begin to talk about the homeless. New York City water freezes. Miami residents plan vacations farther south. 15º French cars don't start. You plan a vacation in Mexico. Your cat insists on sleeping in bed with you. 10º Too cold to ski. You need jumper cables to get the car going. 5º You plan your vacation in Houston. American cars don't start. 0º Alaskans put on T-shirts. Too cold to skate. -10º German cars don't start. Eyes freeze shut when you blink. -15º You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo. Arkansans stick their tongues on metal objects. Miami residents cease to exist. -20º Cat insists on sleeping in your pajamas with you. Politicians actually do something about the homeless. Minnesotans shovel snow off the roof. Japanese cars don't start. -25º Too cold to think. You need jumper cables to get the driver going. -30º You plan a two-week hot bath. The mighty Monongahela freezes. Swedish cars don't start. -40º Californians disappear. Minnesotans button top button. Canadians put on sweaters. Your car helps you plan your trip south. -50º Congressional hot air freezes. Alaskans close the bathroom window. -80º Hell freezes over. Polar bears move south. -90º Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets.