How Kids Develop Knowing the Early Retirement Mentality

[Ready-4-ER-at-14]

I was reading the thread on stealth with wealth and it made me wonder how the kids of other people here accepted the ideas of the parents and why they chose what they did. Two of my four kids did not live with me full time due to divorce and two did the entire childhood. All seem to have a work ethic.

Instead of talking about the kids in detail I'll just use descriptive terms that I think will probably say a lot to people.

All the kids knew about book richest man in Babylon and the ideas from the book rich dad poor dad. They knew financial terms and had at least some college. Will talk about kids from oldest to youngest. Older kids were affected by the divorce and second was pretty young at divorce and most affected. Younger kids were always surprised when their friends likes us and thought we were cool. (did the meaning of that term change? lol)

methodical plugger. Bought into it all, hook line and sinker. His retirement and financial plan on track. Probably the best on keeping budget due to multiple kids of his own. Got masters on own. Managing Programmer working at a well known corporation. Has a gig on side.

doing it my own way. Bought into it, but many interruptions in the plan. Many of those work-related complications that screwed up his college. Kind of proud or secretive about problems so let things implode rather than seeking help. Probably has as much as average American worker. Maybe he is showing stealth wealth to me. He has a great work ethic. He was also a prodigal son who left when the first plan wouldn't work and explored the world. Seems to be coming back to the family and is in a good relationship.
Seems to be doing management type activities and getting schooling along the way.

Financially Conservative Computer programmer. School easy peasy. Making good bucks and stock options in one of worlds largest corporation. He knows a lot of details about specific things related to insurance calculations, and has even worked calculating things of extreme importance to financial markets. A bit of a procrastinator or just over extended and seems to want to invest in himself and avoid the stock market. Couldn't at one point, due to his job apparently. He wants house money accumulation pot out of stock market.

Maturing preppy. Very much like her mother even to the careen choice after college. She absorbed it all and was a big influence to her match for equally preppy husband. They went from Dave Ramsey steps to Needing financial consultants in a few years. They hit the equivalent of the lottery with a stock from work situation and are now likely better off than us. Interestingly daughter was much more insistent than her hubby to bring the people in. I think it is because i enjoy investing as a hobby and spend a lot of time on it.

So it appears 3 of 4 have grabbed the Golden ticket. And one the Bronze or Siver ticket.

At times I feel regrets that i didn't do a better job, but men plan and the gods laugh. All you can do is all you can do. Hopefully all you can do is enough.

Am curious how others did in this parenting opportunity.

 

[athena53]

Bronze or Silver is good, too!

I have one child with an Ex who was a financial train wreck. We divorced when DS was 12. Finances improved considerably after that- I had a very good job and took my share of the equity in the marital home and added a big mortgage to buy a smaller house that made me a $200K profit when I sold 7 years later.

DS was not a scholar; he got through college only after we (second DH and I) got him a psychologist to help him manage his ADD. He did, however, pick up two important things for me rather than following his father's footsteps: LBYM and a healthy work ethic. He started out answering calls from people who had totalled their cars, worked his way into settling complex liability claims, and just this year started an entry-level actuarial position, which he loves. He started on the actuarial exams at age 37 and has passed two- remarkable given how many years it's been since he took Math in college and the fact that he can study with 3 small kids running around.

He says he'll never retire. He could change his mind; I'd planned to retire at 65 and did so at 61. I have no idea what they have saved but they have a decent house and live modestly. He doesn't seem to be terribly interested in investing and neither does DDIL so I'm guessing they have his 401(k) and other savings in pretty vanilla stuff. I need to talk to them about that (just ask questions about type of investment, not amount).

I'm 70 and likely to leave enough $$$ to them that ER WILL be an option no matter what. Two brothers, both trustees of my revocable trust, can make investment decisions and DS can be involved if he wants to be. Both brothers did stellar jobs handling Dad's finances but I know DS s likely to outlive them and need to keep an eye on that.

 

[mystang52]

Lead by example was my [unintentional] method In their teen years, I made them divide their work earnings into 1/3's: personal spending, used car purchase, and college. When they got to college they were responsible for books. They asked me some questions as young adults, but the seed had already been planted. For the most part, they are following in Dad's footsteps regarding financial planning. It helps that their respective spouses are on the same page.

 

[pacergal]

We never had the ER mentality, planned "normal" retirement at 65, it just so happened that paying attention later in life got us to the point of choosing to leave at 60.

We did have a LBYM and save mentality, and both our kids have picked that up.
Both kids are able to adjust their budgets as needed and know the value of savings long term.
I have shared various financial books/articles with them.
I think they are doing well at this point in their respective lives. They both choose teaching careers, so not high income earners, but are following their passions.
We do offer some financial gifting as able.

 

[badatmath]

I decided I wanted to retire early in a class about math - something about if i had $X by the age of 25 it should grow to $Y and I thought damn, I can do that. IDK how old I was perhaps high school or college.

 

[Midpack]

My parents didn’t teach me anything about retirement, and I didn’t have any idea what their plan was. But they did teach us to be frugal, save $ and work hard - and those things seem to have led me toward career success and valuing FI even if I didn’t know that concept directly.

OTOH I didn’t learn anything at all about investing from my parents, not sure where that idea hit me - but I was 100% equities at age 33 thru 51 yo. I was an active investor from 1987 thru 1990 but drifted into Bogle thereafter. I took personal finance and micro/macro economics as electives in college, and loved both courses - that might have been my exposure to investing.

I had direct cost responsibility early in my career that grew to P&L later, so I was well versed in business. Income statements, balance sheets and capital plans ruled much of my career.

I maxed out my 401k my whole career, and made max contributions to IRAs for DW and I for about 10 years.

I had payroll deductions direct to my brokerage account for more than 15 years, some years my deductions were (much) more than my net pay. In my best year we saved 70% of my gross pay.

So I don’t know exactly what led me down our financial path and ultimately retirement…but I think the simple lessons from my parents were a big influence for all that followed.

And early retirement wasn’t on my radar until well into our lives, probably around 50 yo?

 

[athena53]

I decided I wanted to retire early in a class about math - something about if i had $X by the age of 25 it should grow to $Y and I thought damn, I can do that. IDK how old I was perhaps high school or college.

I'd say your screen name is a misnomer! I wish compound interest would be required by HS at least. People who don't understand it make bad decisions.

 

[ncbill]

I'm hoping my kids will stay long enough to retire with a military pension by their mid-50s.

One could also have a LEO pension around that time.