I also just smile, agree, and acknowledge our good fortune.
"You're so lucky"
"Yes, and I'm very thankful for that"
+1 on both. Just be grateful and gracious and leave it at that.
I also just smile, agree, and acknowledge our good fortune.
"You're so lucky"
"Yes, and I'm very thankful for that"
If you want to have any friends, the best way and (likely the only) way to answer is "Wow, you got that right!" Rubbing people's noses in their failures relative to your success is never a good plan.
Ha
I should have responded to your post here earlier. I did not think that you were trying to make the questioner feel bad, and I should have made that clear rather than leading you to believe that I was critical. I apologize for my clumsiness.Thanks. That's not and was never the intention. It's annoying everytime you hear the same thing and wanted to know how to handle the situation politely without getting angry.
I agree with you. Still, I am sometimes amazed at how many stupid decisions I have made over my lifetime, that didn't kill me or bankrupt me or make me paraplegic, but might have done.
A person cannot rely on luck to achieve success, as there just isn't that much luck in the whole world. Still, everyone needs luck, if only to account for being among the living by late middle age. For the logically inclined, luck is necessary but not sufficient to bring about good results.
Ha
I think, being charitable, that some people say "you are lucky" as shorthand for "you are in a good spot", not "you achieved your present situation through chance."
I don't get many comments like this because I don't choose to let acquaintances know the details of my financial situation. And, like Travelover, I don't much care what folks think about it. (See the signature line--also by Heinlein.)
The friends and relatives that comment enviously on the (near) financial independence my wife and I enjoy almost invariably have kids whose financial demands make retirement an ever fading dream. We chose long ago not to have kids (for many reasons that had nothing to do with money) so whenever we encounter this kind of envy we just turn it around and say that the ones with kids are the lucky ones. They've invested in love rather than money and will reap the return in kids and grandkids as the years wear on, while child-free folk like us will just be old and alone.
Of course we don't really believe any of that, but it shuts down the "you're so lucky" routine quickly enough.
As my mother told me, sincerity is the key to success. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.And be totally sincere about it.
What I note is that folks assume that the things you end up in that look fortunate are "luck". However, one doesn't know if one was put into that situation, if that would have the same (or better) results. For example, several posters mentioned how lucky they felt being born white and in the U.S.A. I am not white, and while I was born here my parents were immigrants and we grew up barely above the poverty line. I could look at the situation and say "I would be better off if I was born white". However, I'm glad I was not. Why? Because I don't know if, being born white, I would have had the same drive for achievement that has contributed to my "lucky" position today. Perhaps I would have assumed that everything would come my way, take things for granted, and not strive to be the best with my academics, athletics, and career. So yes, you can be born into situations that seem more fortunate than others. But ultimately one has to decide if they are going to do what they can with the hand that was dealt to them which doesn't guarantee but can improve the odds, or spend more time looking at others and wishing for the "luck" they see, which has more odds of failing.
The friends and relatives that comment enviously on the (near) financial independence my wife and I enjoy almost invariably have kids whose financial demands make retirement an ever fading dream. We chose long ago not to have kids (for many reasons that had nothing to do with money) so whenever we encounter this kind of envy we just turn it around and say that the ones with kids are the lucky ones. They've invested in love rather than money and will reap the return in kids and grandkids as the years wear on, while child-free folk like us will just be old and alone.
Of course we don't really believe any of that, but it shuts down the "you're so lucky" routine quickly enough.
+1. Well said. Color of one's character, coupled with the right dose of inner drive, and two good parents are the most important factors in the beginning.
That's what Dan Rather said to The Who's Roger Daltrey in a TV interview I saw the other day.Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.
Good point, we are a worrisome and miserable lot here...........
Sometimes the very traits that lead one to a LBYM / ER life are the seeds of worry & misery.
Sometimes the very traits that lead one to a LBYM / ER life are the seeds of worry & misery.
Some of the luckiest people I know will never be able to ER. Some love what they do, and can hardly believe they get paid to do it. Some are very generous with their time and money and can always see someone or a cause that could use money more then they can.
But the luckiest of all are the few who live 100% in the present, make each day an adventure and most importantly, truly do not worry about the future. At all. They are happy & free believe it or not.
Sometimes the very traits that lead one to a LBYM / ER life are the seeds of worry & misery.
Most of us have favorite coal mine canaries to gauge how different life strategies are working out. The free as a bird types would deny that they are employing a strategy, but lack of recognition of what you are doing does not change what you are doing. I have known few to no men with this approach. Usually feckless men are heavy dopers and essentially have seceded from life. I tend not to meet them.But the luckiest of all are the few who live 100% in the present, make each day an adventure and most importantly, truly do not worry about the future. At all. They are happy & free believe it or not.