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Old 11-12-2013, 09:40 AM   #21
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....
Since I posted last night my wife is now zeroing in on Prescott, AZ and Bend, OR. The benefit of these two places is there will be lots of folks from elsewhere and I believe that is when people are the friendliest.
.....
When looking around I liked Prescott a bunch - from the valley in Oregon, so clear skies were of great interest to me. Prescott has big weather, which is entertaining, but if it gets too snowy you can drive down toward Phoenix and into the warm. Lots of Phoenix residents seem to retire to Prescott for the cooler temps. Kind of a well-off western vibe.
Bend is much the same, but I think colder. My thought is that Prescott residents are further to the right politically, but I've never lived either place, so...

I think you are spot on with your quoted second sentence. We ended up in La Quinta Ca, a destination town, and when a bunch of people are without contacts there is more desire to make contacts - everybody is trying! Here an Oregon license plate is plenty of reason to strike up a conversation.
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Old 11-12-2013, 09:45 AM   #22
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I know our local library holds a biweekly "yarn club" and several other gatherings of different interests. You can also check the Meetup.com website for meetings where others share common interests.
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Old 11-12-2013, 10:20 AM   #23
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After retirement, DW and I moved to a new area that was aligned with our interests in the outdoors and fishing, and have become active in a local fishing club. I'm an introvert, but joining up with people who share a passion has been (surprisingly) enjoyable. I'm really glad we gave it a try.

When we had j*bs, we did very little socializing outside of work.

We had no family near our prior home and are actually closer to my DW's family now.
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Old 11-12-2013, 10:22 AM   #24
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We've moved around all our lives, so we almost welcome moving to meet new people and have new experiences of all kinds. But adapting to a new location where you don't know anyone is very much an individual thing. Some people have a very difficult time adjusting, but most people get over it pretty quickly. The OP sounds outgoing enough to adapt pretty easily based on his/her posts. You may have to force yourself to get out there and maybe join some clubs to start making connections, but I suspect you'll do just fine in the end. Best of luck whatever you decide...
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Old 11-12-2013, 10:25 AM   #25
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I am also interested in the Pacific NW when we retire. Currently living in SLC Utah, which is actually a great small-big city but (after 35 years) we are starting to burn out. The winters up there actually sound good to us as due to global warming or whatever the winters here in the mountains have been getting progressively worse (worse = less snow). We are going to be doing a VW camper van trip up to that area a few times in the coming year and hoping to find a nice area not too far from a real city for the occasional (just occasional) city doings and close to outdoor activities (hiking, mtn biking, cross country ski, etc.) and still be affordable for a small house/condo, hopefully where we could meet older outdoor recreational people (who are fit, but not necessarily gonzo) We have just started looking. Are there any local secret towns/areas that people could recommend?
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Old 11-12-2013, 11:02 AM   #26
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Well, I guess Wenatchee or around there would be worth a look. That's maybe 2 hours from Seattle metro area. Some of us who bicycle or ride dirtbikes here make the trip to Moab in the winter...
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Old 11-12-2013, 11:07 AM   #27
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Winthrop, WA is sort of a secret town. It is very historic and has GREAT cross country ski trails going right through the town. A outdoor ice skating rink in town too. You can jump on some great hiking trails in Mazama...I think even get on part of the Pacific Crest trail system. It is about 4 hours from Seattle.
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Old 11-12-2013, 11:08 AM   #28
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This is what WA state looks like in the winter....so depressing! I can't wait to get my 'cat out and enjoy more depressing days like that one last year.
You are right for sure! This is typical winter day in Western Washington. Come on up folks, the water's fine!

Ha
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Old 11-12-2013, 11:13 AM   #29
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For us, it has been a total of 22 full moves before retirement.

BUT...
Here's an opinion about retirement living.
The country, state, town, or even the climate doesn't matter as much as finding a lifestyle where you are comfortable with the people with whom you may spend much of the rest of your life.
So, while not being 24/7 socialites, we have found that being in a "COMMUNITY" is not like living in a town. Instead of living in a economically, culturally, and age diverse neighborhood, with workers, and families and kids, our choice has been to live among people with whom we have common interests and goals. The rest of life, takes care of itself.

In the pre-retirement years, we live in neighborhoods, or perhaps rural areas, but we typically live our lives with 5 days of necessary activities, and two days "off". After retirement, it's 7 days continuous of whatever you choose.

Instead of having to hunt out friends or a social life apart from your own home, IF you live in a COMMUNITY of "like interested" people, you naturally merge into a society where you will be comfortable.

My guess is that the reason retirees don't do this, is because they have never experienced (for want of a better word).. communal living. It's an experience that has to happen... as it defies explanation. In a vacation area, experiencing this, is a matter of renting for a month or two... since being taken around by a realtor to see "houses"... is a shallow means of making a decision. Seeing people in action... meeting face to face... knowing what happens on a daily basis in the "community" is more of a measure, than a slick brochure, or an hour guided tour.

The second part of the decision, is really KNOWING what you want. When we moved into our community, the last thing in my bucket list was dancing, and parties... We ended up loving Square Dancing.. (back in the 1990's)... and this turned to line dancing and ballroom dancing later on.... Can hardly believe it myself!... Then another surprise... putting on and Emceeing parties... From a guy who spent much of his life reading books. Then an easy transition to canoeing and biking, body surfing (Florida), Billiards, and teaching computers.

All of this and more, because of living in a community. From being somewhat asocial to knowing every one of the 350 residents and their dogs.

We didn't start out that way... and even now, many of our neighbors are less active and indulge in their own interests... Still we all have common bonds. Similar age, similar socioeconomic backgrounds(middle income), no on-site kids, and the same outlook on life that brought us all together in the first place.

Now we live(d) in three different retirement communities and find them all to have the same basic characteristics... Our current, and probably final residence is in an older, less active community, but with the same kinds of people who have the common goal of enjoying the retirement years.

My opinion only...
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Old 11-12-2013, 11:17 AM   #30
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You are right for sure! This is typical winter day in Western Washington. Come on up folks, the water's fine!

Ha
That was eastern Washington

Near the table mountain area above Blewett Pass.
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Old 11-12-2013, 11:20 AM   #31
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After retirement, DW and I moved to a new area that was aligned with our interests in the outdoors and fishing, and have become active in a local fishing club. I'm an introvert, but joining up with people who share a passion has been (surprisingly) enjoyable. I'm really glad we gave it a try.

When we had j*bs, we did very little socializing outside of work.

We had no family near our prior home and are actually closer to my DW's family now.
Interesting point. I have a friend, very introverted, who is into fishing. He can find a friend anywhere there there are fish.
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Old 11-12-2013, 03:03 PM   #32
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I left California for Hawaii after I retired. The only person I knew was my sister and her husband, they had only been there for a couple of years so they'd didn't have a wide circle of friends.

Even 13 years later I'd still say that my closest friends are in California. You can't replace old friends. There is no doubt that it is harder making friends for INTJ like myself if you aren't working. Most of my friends I've made through volunteer activities and playing poker, so you'll definitely need a plan to get out of the house and meet people. Still I have made friends and I don't regret my decision at all.
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Old 11-12-2013, 06:09 PM   #33
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I agree that it all depends on the individual.
I have been totally uprooted and moved to a distant location 13 times since I left college (16 times total). I never thought about that being strange; it was just the way it was.

If you have hobbies you really care about, you can always find kindred spirits.

If you have strong interests (arts, music, crafts, etc.), you can always find kindred spirits.

If you are willing to get out and wander, you will often be surprised at the great people you will encounter. Simple example: I have rarely gone into a bar (I only go to those that have good craft beer selections) without being able to have wonderful conversations with the people at adjoining stools. It can begin with comments about the beer and go anywhere from there.
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Old 11-12-2013, 06:27 PM   #34
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I live in the Canadian Gulf Islands... I could jump in my sea kayak and in a 20 minute paddle I can be in the U.S. San Juan Islands.... during the "nice" weather months there can be no place on earth that would be better... but once the winter rains set in... I'm off to the Baja!!!

Yeah, life is rough....
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Old 11-12-2013, 06:50 PM   #35
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To the OP, you might see how well you do with new folks by simulating a drop in situation before you move. The idea that came to me was to go to meetup.com and just pick something you're interested in and start going. This will work if you're currently in a big town. After a while, you might realize that it was easy and fun, or not so much, meeting new people 'from scratch'.
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Old 11-12-2013, 07:00 PM   #36
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To the OP, you might see how well you do with new folks by simulating a drop in situation before you move. The idea that came to me was to go to meetup.com and just pick something you're interested in and start going. This will work if you're currently in a big town. After a while, you might realize that it was easy and fun, or not so much, meeting new people 'from scratch'.
That's a good idea, but relationships take time to build. Sometimes the friends you make are second degree contacts from these activities. It can take 6 months or more.
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Old 11-12-2013, 08:42 PM   #37
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I've seen "meet up" in a number of posts, what is it?...a website? Thanks
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Old 11-12-2013, 08:44 PM   #38
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It's a great site to find like minded people that have your hobbies, interest, etc. in common:

Find Meetup Groups near you - Meetup

You put in your zip code and interests.
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Old 11-12-2013, 09:16 PM   #39
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Thanks Cheesehead, I'll take a look see...sounds like a great resource.
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Old 11-12-2013, 11:50 PM   #40
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Practical friendship advice link...

What's a real friend?
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