Do your family members listen to your financial advice?

[JustCurious]

My MIL is being taken advantage of by her local "friendly" Edward Jones guy, but she won't listen to my advice. Do your family members listen to you when it comes to financial advice? What about parents? Adult children?

 

[gindie]

My MIL is being taken advantage of by her local "friendly" Edward Jones guy, but she won't listen to my advice. Do your family members listen to you when it comes to financial advice? What about parents? Adult children?

Parents, not really. I begged them to let me research the Medicare Drug plans, but they blindly chose the AARP one because that's the where they had their Medigap insurance. The AARP plan in 2006 did not cover the "donut hole" and consequently they paid thousands more than they had to. Didn't change for 2007 either.

 

[73ss454]

A member of my family's husband died in a car accident about 2 years ago. He was a fireman and well insured. She got over 2M in assets and went to a friend of he husbands who is a broker and an X fireman.

This guy sold her 2 annuities and a life ins. policy for 19K a year for a 500K policy. She's 61 with no dependents. One of the annuities was for 3% fixed. She asked me to help look at what she bought and speak with her broker. Well I did and after showing her what he did to her she cancelled the ins policy but still keeps the annuities. She says she needs them so the guy can manage the money.

What can you do

 

[Texas Proud]

Yes.... mother, sister, BIL, a couple of friends...

They know I know more than they do and will take my advice most of the times...

 

[lazygood4nothinbum]

i can hardly figure this out for myself so hopefully no one is listening to me.

though for a short time i got my brother to understand why the inherited house would be better sold so we could invest the money rather than sitting there while we pay insurance & taxes on it. that understanding lasted about two weeks. the last we spoke he came off as if selling the house was a favor to me; he'd rather keep it as an investment.

 

[Nords]

Parents, parents in law: no.
Spouse: can be persuaded but has a nasty habit of asking questions that require hours of research & data crunching.
Brother-in-law: we trade stock ideas.
Kid: absolutely, but she tells me what she doesn't like to do.
Neighbors: why would they listen to me? I've been unemployed for nearly five years!

 

[Goonie]

Mom...Yes! We are continuously tweaking her investing and estate planning!

Siblings....they haven't asked...I haven't offered. However if they did ask, bro would be a "Yes"...Sis would be a "NO" (she knows it all!!!.....she thinks!!!)

 

[bssc]

Parents: I learned to save and invest from them. I remember following IBM while the other kids followed baseball teams.

Wife: Hands everything to me and makes faces when I try to explain things to her which is only fair when she tries to explain electricity and electronics to me I make the same faces.

Sisters: You need to have money to need financial advice. Buying two pairs of every color of new sneaker is not a good investment.

Work: Get some questions. Someone called from Maui to talk about the mechanics of our stock awards and distributions. Discussed the restructuring of the 401(k) and how we are going to be limited to 10% contribution to the company stock (which is OK by me).

 

[haha]

No way! In spite of being a fairly successful investor with no other source of income for many years, I guess I am just not a person who inspires a lot of confidence. At first it frustrated me, but now I figure that it just lets me off the hook for any untoward events down the road.

Ha

 

[bpp]

One relative asked for advice on what to do in their 401k,
though I don't know if they ever did what I suggested. But
they'll probably be all right even if they don't.

Another one just started bringing up financial issues, seems
to be flailing a bit. IRA took a beating in 2000 and still hasn't
recovered, doesn't trust stocks as a result, so wants to get
into real estate in order to be able to "see where my money is,
and it's a buyer's market now!" Ok, what are typical occupancy
rates in the area, and how would that impact the cash flow
estimates? "Oh, good point, hadn't thought of that."
And what is the IRA in, by the way? "I don't know, it's, um, in an IRA."
Dialogue is just starting, so will see what happens.

 

[Caroline]

HAH!!!

 

[SteveR]

Adult kids: No
Mother: Yes but only if it involves CDs and AARP funds. Otherwise it is too risky. I have POA for her and have moved some stuff to Vanguard where I can tweek it a little.

Step Kids: Too busy spending $$ to listen to me.

It is frustrating.

 

[unclemick]

Long list of nays - EXCEPT my oldest nephew out of the Naval Academy read my 1994 Bogle on Mutual Funds and went ten years or so on the TSP index 500 equivalent before he went over to the dark side:

Bernstein's Four Pillars!!!

heh heh heh - only kidding Bill! Er sort of. He sort of lost it - rotating to CA.

 

[Jarhead*]

No way! In spite of being a fairly successful investor with no other source of income for many years, I guess I am just not a person who inspires a lot of confidence. At first it frustrated me, but now I figure that it just lets me off the hook for any untoward events down the road.

Ha

Both of my adult children are well adjusted, outgoing and productive.

But they both share a common trait. They spend everything they make.

Up to a couple years ago, everytime I got together with them, I tried to give them "unsolicited advice". Not good. Loads of tension.

My game plan since that time has been to mind my own business.

We now get along a helluva lot better.

 

[cute fuzzy bunny]

No.

Even after they ask me something and I give them an answer and its born out, and what they do is completely disastrous...they still go with their guts, advisers, and any available hairballs.

Now anytime anyone asks me anything about investing, I save time and tell them "Hey, it could go in any direction" or "I dont like anything right now", depending on the question.

Approximates the same results and nobody feels bad.

Sounds like we can call this the "Jarhead Method".

Or in light of the "HaHa" observation, I guess nobody should listen to the self-made multimillionaire who retired at 39

 

[sgeeeee]

They've never really asked and I haven't offered any advice -- directly. This Christmas I gave my father and brothers each a copy of Engineering Your Retirement. My father has since shown a little bit of interest, but I've gotten no feedback from my brothers.

 

[Peaceful_Warrior]

My Dad and I often discuss financial matters. Occasionally, I have something smart to add but most of the time I'm just learning from him or running my own ideas past him.

My favorite idea so far is to sell off my condo and downgrade with zero down and then invest the equity from sale in higher-interest investments. I calculated that in 15 years, the money I would have paid in mortgage + down payment but instead invested would be able to pay for the mortgage on its own. Then, every year after that is just continued positive growth for the investments.

 

[Outtahere]

Even if I knew enough to give anyone in my family advice they wouldn't take it. I do suggest LBYM and talk about saving more but it falls on deaf ears. Husband doesn't want to know and his kids are having a hell of a time trying to keep up with those damned Jones. They know that I'm learning this stuff but don't seem interested in any of it so I don't mention it.

 

[boots]

No
So be it!!

 

[donheff]

I don't volunteer advice for my brothers and sisters. They seem to be OK and haven't asked. Parents are dead. My son is envious of my leisure and has adopted a LBYM lifestyle (to a degree) and is socking $ into retirement accounts. DD is in college and doesn't much care just yet although she did not object to me funding a Roth matching her part-time earnings.

 

[Moemg]

If my daughter asks I'll help her or push her in the right direction .My sister is a nun ,so none advise to her and my other sister is a Live way above our means type .

 

[Sarah in SC]

Not so much. A few friends wait until they are in (bad) debt up to their eyeballs before asking, then are surprised when the answer is LBYM and pay it off. Sister and BIL do okay, I think, so I don't bother them. Brother, hopeless.

Parents: I try to get them to save money, but it is an uphill struggle. I will be responsible for their care when Dad can't work, so I'm trying to get as much cash put away as possible each year. They let me buy the funds. Have a few friends that I buy funds for, but I don't encourage it.

Who wants to hear about saving money for retirement---there's a sale at the outlet mall! ...and then, when we FIRE, all I am sure we will hear is "Sarah & Donald are so lucky that they don't have kids, and were able to save all that money!".
Sarah

 

[Eagle43]

I have told everyone who will listen: "Save 10% of every dollar you earn." Put it in index funds. To date I have a huge following: None.

I think it's because I do not flaunt my wealth (such as it is). If I had the big house, new car, etc., they'd believe.

 

[W2R]

I should hope not - - they all know more about financial matters than I do!!

But I listen very closely to financial advice from my brother. He is very careful to couch his advice in tactful language ("Some people might find it advantageous to do xyz", or "One suggestion might be to consider lmnop").

I haven't done EVERYTHING he suggests. However, I have done about 90% of what he suggests.

He's an early-retired CPA/CFO, and he's an absolute wizard with money.

 

[CyclingInvestor]

In general, yes, mainly with regards to keeping a diversified portfolio
instead of all aggressive growth portfolio in one case, or an all MMF
portfolio in another. I have also managed to encourage several people
to start 401k contributons (they were passing up matching contributions!)

I managed to score several credibility points when I checked out 2
HRBlock tax returns and found numerous errors.

My general advice of LBYM and putting savings first have pretty much
always been ignored, however.