DW Retiring instead of ME

[foxfirev5]

My wife came home from her long commute last Friday pretty ticked off. She had her annual review which her boss had told her that although she is a hard working good employee her attendance could be better. This she disputed vigorously. She had taken less than half her sick time and a whopping two weeks of vacation. Looks like a ploy to get rid of another older worker.
After considerable discussion it dawned on me that why doesn't she just hang it up. We had been planning for me to retire in a year or two. However my job is going pretty good (at or nearly FI is the key). Plus I earn about twice as much with considerable perks. Since we've been saving well over half our income I know we can live on my income. At worst it would mean me working an additional year. My job would also allow my wife to travel with me much more often. It appears that we will achieve a considerable improvement in quality of life. The only downside would be if I lost my health or job tomorrow. But I'm beginning to think you can't plan for every eventuality.
Are we missing something?

 

[arebelspy]

My wife came home from her long commute last Friday pretty ticked off. She had her annual review which her boss had told her that although she is a hard working good employee her attendance could be better. This she disputed vigorously. She had taken less than half her sick time and a whopping two weeks of vacation. Looks like a ploy to get rid of another older worker.
After considerable discussion it dawned on me that why doesn't she just hang it up. We had been planning for me to retire in a year or two. However my job is going pretty good (at or nearly FI is the key). Plus I earn about twice as much with considerable perks. Since we've been saving well over half our income I know we can live on my income. At worst it would mean me working an additional year. My job would also allow my wife to travel with me much more often. It appears that we will achieve a considerable improvement in quality of life. The only downside would be if I lost my health or job tomorrow. But I'm beginning to think you can't plan for every eventuality.
Are we missing something?

Seems like a good plan. At worst adding a year to your working? That's not a bad tradeoff at all. Time to start the detailed planning to see for sure.

 

[mickeyd]

Are we missing something?

Some times good stuff happens to good people. Sounds to me like your plan has all the bases covered.

 

[KingB]

Looks like a ploy to get rid of another older worker.

..Or a justification of a small raise or none at all. Happened to DW, 2 consecutive years.

She should "feel" the situation. If she thinks it is a ploy to get rid of her, she may just wait for it. That way she may get a severance package and unemployment benefit.

You have to weigh everything - including her long commute.

 

[steelyman]

My wife came home from her long commute last Friday pretty ticked off. She had her annual review which her boss had told her that although she is a hard working good employee her attendance could be better. This she disputed vigorously. She had taken less than half her sick time and a whopping two weeks of vacation. Looks like a ploy to get rid of another older worker.
After considerable discussion it dawned on me that why doesn't she just hang it up.

That would certainly resolve the "attendance problem". I think we are all wishing to not attend, especially if we have to go through unpleasant things like that. Your thoughts seem entirely reasonable (and generous) to me.

 

[mystang52]

Agree with KingB. Maybe your DW should stick it out just a bit longer and see if she gets a severance offer. Heck, she can always "accidentally" come in late a few times, call in sick a couple of Mondays, and who knows what they might do at that point.

 

[chris2008]

I like the idea of fishing for a good bye package but I would not do it by negative performance. This can drag someone down emotionally and then it's not worth it.

However, if packages have been offered to other staff before she might have a conversation on being open for an offer and imply that she might consider leaving but could not do it for free. I was lucky with such a discussion once and left on good terms while alredy having secured a new job.

 

[foxfirev5]

Thanks to all for the advice. Her severence would not be significant and the emotional toll of slacking isn't her style. I think she'll take the high road and give her 3 weeks notice and get on with her life.

 

[Dawg52]

Thanks to all for the advice. Her severence would not be significant and the emotional toll of slacking isn't her style. I think she'll take the high road and give her 3 weeks notice and get on with her life.

What if they do a turn about and offer a raise to keep her? I've saw crazier things where I worked.

 

[chinaco]

Did she describe what he meant by attendance could be better?

Some companies have certain rules other than number of sick days.

These rules tend to be guidelines.

If the manager acknowledged "hard working"... and that means good employee... your DW may be over reacting. Was it a formal reprimand or just a comment? Is this a new manager that she might be reacting to (or is the a manager she has worked for several years)?

If companies are experiencing higher than normal sick time off (on average)... the word can come down from HR or division or a department... to have the discussion with everyone (or people who took time off) in hopes of increasing productivity. But it is generally not a threat (assuming one is within the guidelines).

I have seen some situations where management is (guided) to give some level of improvement feedback... because everyone can improve something.

If it is an overreaction, it would be a mistake to let that be the determining factor to exit. IMO - It would be better to plan it and exit on a planned time line!

To leave in a huff, will leave no one feeling good about it... including your DW!

I would give it some time and cool down.

But you might use it as an opportunity to discuss definite plans for FIRE (but... planned and non-emotional)!

 

[donheff]

If she doesn't like the job she might consider ER but if she likes it she should think twice. Demming (father of TQM for you kids) called performance appraisal the cardinal sin of management for good reason. The bum rap could mean anything or nothing. Some idiots believe they have to dig up things that can be improved for every employee - even the most outstanding. I remember a boss who really liked me but rated me lower than the top on the factor I thought was my best. When I questioned that he explained that he had to pick one factor to drop down and would be glad to switch it.

 

[eytonxav]

Sounds like she may also be tired of the long commute. While I don't love my job, I don't hate it either, but my long commute, going through a lot of construction is wearing me down. What ever the decision, it appears you both will be in good shape.

 

[Sarah in SC]

I like this idea a lot! And I'm working toward DH retiring well ahead of me as his job is declining in joy while mine is not too objectionable. Even though he makes more than me, we'll be fine when he's ready to hang up his network engineering hat. Quality of life is critical for us.
I've quit jobs under the same set of circumstances as your wife, where it just became intolerable and I couldn't look my boss in the face any more. If I don't believe in what I'm doing and don't respect who I'm working for, I just can't do it. Your wife should definitely take the high road and leave with dignity.

 

[Nords]

Thanks to all for the advice. Her severence would not be significant and the emotional toll of slacking isn't her style. I think she'll take the high road and give her 3 weeks notice and get on with her life.

Her workplace retention committee sure seems to be selling the heck out of the benefits of staying there...

I never knew that workplace attendance had a bearing on productivity or profits.

 

[foxfirev5]

I like this idea a lot! And I'm working toward DH retiring well ahead of me as his job is declining in joy while mine is not too objectionable. Even though he makes more than me, we'll be fine when he's ready to hang up his network engineering hat. Quality of life is critical for us.
I've quit jobs under the same set of circumstances as your wife, where it just became intolerable and I couldn't look my boss in the face any more. If I don't believe in what I'm doing and don't respect who I'm working for, I just can't do it. Your wife should definitely take the high road and leave with dignity.

Thanks again to everybody for they're response. Negotiating for a better situation or a raise really isn't important now. It is now a lifestyle choice and we're ready to move on. While I realize that many people in our state - Michigan - would love to have a full time job with benefits. But it 's not worth the cost in our present situation.
DW will give here notice on Tuesday and give full effort through the month of July. As of August first we'll proceed to the next chapter. Thanks again, this forum has been of great help though the last couple years of trials and tribulations.

 

[arebelspy]

Congrats and good luck!

 

[FreeAtLast]

She had taken less than half her sick time and a whopping two weeks of vacation. Looks like a ploy to get rid of another older worker.

It is HER sick time and she was using what was given to HER. It is like the boss saying you cashed all of the paycheck that we gave you last year. It would have been better for "THE COMPANY" if you did not cash one or two.

 

[Ally]

I envy her! Good luck to both of you and enjoy the new lifestyle.

 

[FUEGO]

I'll echo the sentiments of others. Could be the manager had to put something down under the fill-in-the-box of "areas that could use improvement". And this was the least insulting category. The DW works hard, gets stuff done, is competent, organized, etc, so why not put down to work on attendance since that is something objective that she could focus on, but doesn't directly put down her performance of the job itself.

I think I had to have 3 thing that needed improvement on my performance review. The manager just picked some random stuff, checked the boxes next to them, and said I may have the opportunity to take some classes to help me improve in those areas.

 

[Moscyn]

Thanks again to everybody for they're response. Negotiating for a better situation or a raise really isn't important now. It is now a lifestyle choice and we're ready to move on. While I realize that many people in our state - Michigan - would love to have a full time job with benefits. But it 's not worth the cost in our present situation.
DW will give here notice on Tuesday and give full effort through the month of July. As of August first we'll proceed to the next chapter. Thanks again, this forum has been of great help though the last couple years of trials and tribulations.

Congrats! I think it is a good decision. Am sure she will enjoy ER and you too will feel the benefits of her ER. I ER last year and am doing good things to make home cosy and comfortable. We have healthy home cooked meals, I am available for travel anytiime and I also have a sweeter temperament.

 

[audreyh1]

Thanks again to everybody for they're response. Negotiating for a better situation or a raise really isn't important now. It is now a lifestyle choice and we're ready to move on. While I realize that many people in our state - Michigan - would love to have a full time job with benefits. But it 's not worth the cost in our present situation.
DW will give here notice on Tuesday and give full effort through the month of July. As of August first we'll proceed to the next chapter. Thanks again, this forum has been of great help though the last couple years of trials and tribulations.

That sounds exciting! I bet her manager will be surprised though. Wouldn't be surprised with a counter offer - might be a nice one! Keep your options open, but it's great that you both feel free for her to leave. Does a lot for the sanity!

Audrey

 

[2B]

I think your wife is pretty clever. She has gotten you to agree to let her retire and you work an extra year or two. My DW pretty much did the same to me. It just goes to show you that women are truly smarter than men.

I've had far worse performance reviews than what her's sounded like and the thought of immediately resigning never entered my mind. If that's the principal reason she wants to retire, it can only be because she knows she can. The review is being called the "reason" but it's really an "excuse."

She can always pull the plug anytime she wants. I like the suggestions people have given about asking for a package and/or becoming "sick" more often until they take action. Is "sick pay" accrued so she'd get paid for it if she left or is she leaving money on the table if she leaves any not taken? If so, take all of it before resigning.

 

[Jay_Gatsby]

It is HER sick time and she was using what was given to HER. It is like the boss saying you cashed all of the paycheck that we gave you last year. It would have been better for "THE COMPANY" if you did not cash one or two.

Interesting that they picked her sick time usage. That could constitute a basis for some sort of claim against the company based on medical discrimination. If she is looking for a nice severance and wants to quit, perhaps she should go to HR on this issue and see what she can get. If the company then fires her for complaining, that's potentially a retaliatory action. The fact that she's an older worker is just icing on the cake.

 

[JakeBrake]

Interesting that they picked her sick time usage. That could constitute a basis for some sort of claim against the company based on medical discrimination. If she is looking for a nice severance and wants to quit, perhaps she should go to HR on this issue and see what she can get. If the company then fires her for complaining, that's potentially a retaliatory action. The fact that she's an older worker is just icing on the cake.

Back in the day at Megacorp, I was out sick for 6 weeks. My supervisor did not visit me at home or in the hospital while I was out, although several co-workers did visit.

After I came back to work I received the worst evaluation ever, before or after my illness. My supervisor implied (but did not say directly) that my poor evaluation was due to my illness.

A few years later this supervisor came down with cancer and died shortly. I was not working for him when he died. I must admit I rather enjoyed his funeral.

 

[Jay_Gatsby]

Back in the day at Megacorp, I was out sick for 6 weeks. My supervisor did not visit me at home or in the hospital while I was out, although several co-workers did visit.

After I came back to work I received the worst evaluation ever, before or after my illness. My supervisor implied (but did not say directly) that my poor evaluation was due to my illness.

A few years later this supervisor came down with cancer and died shortly. I was not working for him when he died. I must admit I rather enjoyed his funeral.

Not a big fan of schadenfreude, but your boss seems to have bought into the corporate concept of squeezing out the most productivity from the least number of employees. Humanity and compassion are antithetical to this mission.