Contemplating when to get serious about CCRC?

[aja8888]

Many of my 70 something friends who live in CCRCs are still very active--I don't know about dirt biking but they have golf outings, ski outings, hiking, dancing, a running club, traveling, etc. The fact that you move into a CCRC does not mean you quit having fun. In fact one of the things we are looking forward to in moving into a CCRC is being able to do all the activities and trips.

I'm glad to hear that. I think my general impression about those places is it's seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and getting ready for the worst. I have no experience with a CCRC so I am sure my view is narrow.

We moved into a 55+ community of 427 homes 7 years ago as we need a single level house as DW couldn't handle stairs anymore (she has advanced COPD). I am very active and do anything I want still. DW is pushing a walker around the house. But this place is such a disappointment for me as there are so few men who can (or want to) play golf or do anything of a physical nature. I just lost my weekly golf partner to a stroke and he is 85 who is the only male friend I have in this place that has any interest in golf.

I also try to walk 10,000 steps per day and have found no males in this neighborhood who have any interest in that sort of thing. I usually walk with the dog, myself, or with one of the women in the neighborhood who are out there every day.

My circle of friends are all over 70 and none (except above stroke victim) are living in this community. They are all friends I had from the area where my last house was located so I leave here every day to meet with them and we play golf once a wek, go for day trips, or just hang out. Realistically, all of my older friends are not planning (yet) on a CCRC or other aged living facility as of now.

 

[Car-Guy]

I've given this some thought, more so recently... No options I like but most I HATE! So, when the time comes, (not that far away) our basic plan is to move to a small city and rent a nice house (by then I won't want to maintain my own house) in order to be closer to medical, stores, services, etc.... Then I'll probably either hire a part time or full time maid to cook and kept the place clean. Money isn't an issue.


That will become my last stop. Or as we would say back in the old computer programing days.... EOJ.....

 

[2tswhite]

Yeah, me too.

Just what I want to do when I'm 80 years old. Sell the house, buy another one and pack up my stuff and move?

Nah, I'll just live (and die) in place -

My 90 year old Dad would agree with you. No CCRC for him - he has informed me

 

[BigRedHusker]

I'm now 72 and don't think I have been living under a rock. I had no idea what CCRC was suppose to mean. I of course googled it and first thing that comes up is Child Care Resource Center. I did not figure that was what was being discussed. Further investigation brought me to Continuing Care Retirement Communities. aha

 

[nwsteve]

There are a number of CCRC threads here on the ER Forum as well as a "sticky thread". Since there appears to be some newcomers posting, let's refresh the CCRC foundations info by mentioning that all CCRCs are not created equal. In fact, there are three distinct types-A-C. Only Type A offers life care at a locked-in cost of your original Independent Living entry cost. Yes, your monthly fee will continue to increase, usually at a rate near inflation. By locked-in cost, I mean should you no longer be able to live independently and have to have more care due to memory or any other impairment requiring Asst Living or Skill Nursing, you do not pay more. Even your monthly fee is now caped by your original fee structure.
A move to Asst Living, at Market rates is at least double your Independent Living cost if you are not in a Type A property.
At our Tyoe A property, one spouse can move to Skilled Nursing/Assisted Living services while the other can stay in their original unit at no cost increase despite living in two different units.
Part of our motivation for taking the CCRC path was to be in charge of where we would be living our final years and not dependent on DD having to choose "where to PUT" mom and dad. There are many other reasoning including lock and leave flexibility, security, exposure and a connectness to lots of really smart people,
The variations in CCRC offerings and contracts are so varying, IMHO it is not practical to prescribe a CCRC for anyone but yourselves.

 

[lem1955]

My parents had just come up on the wait list to move to a CCRC. My mother died from cancer at 85 before they were able to move. My father (87) spent the next 6 months grieving and then deciding to go to the CCRC on his own. He was lonely, tired of cooking and caring for his one story household needs on his own. At 91, he is very happy in his apartment at the CCRC. He has his mental faculties but his body is frailer all the time. He has fallen a few times and gets immediate help from the emergency wrist band he wears - staff comes right up if he pushes the button. He has lots of friends - mostly women! Plays bridge and has dinner with others most nights a week. I live 1000 miles away and it gives me confidence he is happy and cared for. My DW (who is 9.5 years older than me) and I will move to a CCRC when she is 80-82. It will be a little too early for me, but I'm thinking of it as a new adventure to be in a city as opposed to a rural area. We will get signed up early next year.

 

[Al in Ohio]

The ones near me look like resorts with indoor and outdoor amenities, lush grounds, scheduled activities, three nice meals a day, housecleaning, even for independent living -- all for one monthly rental change ranging from about $3K to $4K for a single person. Some have entrance fees but not all. No need to buy a condo or townhouse. Seems like a sweet deal. Originally I started scouting them for my 80+ parents, but now I'm wondering if I should go ahead move in when I'm 55 in a year and a half. Anyone done this so young?

That’s when my wife and I started thinking about it. We would be younger than almost anyone else there however. Now we are thinking of moving to a single level courtyard home in a 55+ community first until we are late 60’s early 70’s before moving to a ccrc.

 

[braumeister]

DW and I are both turned off by the residents we see at CCRCs. They always appear to be a few years from the end, and we just can't see ourselves in that group. Since we're still both very healthy (doing half marathons in our 70s), we're putting it off as long as we can. Being in a condo where there is little or nothing do worry about for outside maintenance is a big help.

We have watched several of our neighbors live independently until their 90s, so that's another fact supporting our decision. Never say never, but we're just not there yet.

 

[Al in Ohio]

My parents were in a luxury apartment thru their 80's with semi-full time help taking care of them. After we lost my father, my sister insisted on moving my mother into a brand new CRCC. The deposit was $170K (90% refundable) and the rent was $2050 a month including 20 meals at the nicest restaurant in the city. They had a Dutch chef handling the food.

Most of the people there were 80 years old on average, or a little younger than my mother. She absolutely loved the place and all the activities they had going on.

We ended up having 24/7 care for her @ $12 an hour to watch after her. And she was going through money like a sieve. Looking back on the experience, we should have had her in a full nursing home in our town @ about $7K per month. But she was one social animal and enjoyed life. We finally lost her when she was down to her last $5K cash--time to go.

She did it just right. Good for her. Your sister knew your mother well.

 

[harllee]

DW and I are both turned off by the residents we see at CCRCs. They always appear to be a few years from the end, and we just can't see ourselves in that group. Since we're still both very healthy (doing half marathons in our 70s), we're putting it off as long as we can. Being in a condo where there is little or nothing do worry about for outside maintenance is a big help.

We have watched several of our neighbors live independently until their 90s, so that's another fact supporting our decision. Never say never, but we'r just not there yet.

The CCRCs you have looked at must be very different from the one we are moving to. Sure there are a few frail folks with walkers but most look like folks at a swanky country club party. At age 70 I am not running marathons (never have) but I do walk the golf course and carry my clubs and so do many folks at the CCRC.

 

[Al in Ohio]

Interesting range of comments. Thank you.

I am curious of those that said they plan to run out the clock in place do you have children you can count on to oversee day to day of hiring/policing in-house care?

If not, how do you plan to "manage" the process?

With no children, this seems to be a real issue and a big plus for a "reputable" CCRC…

This has been my Dad’s plan and quite frankly I resent it. I would never consider expecting my kids to take on the burden of caring for me in any way.

 

[RetiredHappy]

We moved into a 55+ community of 427 homes 7 years ago as we need a single level house as DW couldn't handle stairs anymore (she has advanced COPD). I am very active and do anything I want still. But this place is such a disappointment for me as there are so few men who can (or want to) play golf or do anything of a physical nature. I just lost my weekly golf partner to a stroke and he is 85 who is the only male friend I have in this place that has any interest in golf.

I also try to walk 10,000 steps per day and have found no males in this neighborhood who have any interest in that sort of thing.

I think we are very fortunate to have found our current community. Back when the housing market crashed in 2008, there were about 3,000 homes built and the target had been 10,000 homes, well we are on our way there...

We have a private country club (Nicklaus course) and a public course (also Nicklaus). The 3rd course didn't survive the 2008 crash and has now been partially turned into new homes, plus a small golf academy. We have 2 sports and social clubs, one tied to the country club membership.

We are not called retirement or active 55 community and instead, we are called a resort community. A resort where people happen to live. There are many individual gated developments here. 99% of the home owners here are retired and very active. My husband and I golf about 4 days a week, he is with the men groups 3 days a week and I play with the ladies group on Weds and other ladies on another 2 days. My husband and I play together on Sundays.

Both the sports and social clubs have a ton of events.

Del Webb just started to develop in the north-east part of the community and they also have their own clubhouse with sports and social events.

 

[Turbo29]

DW and I are both turned off by the residents we see at CCRCs. They always appear to be a few years from the end, and we just can't see ourselves in that group. Since we're still both very healthy (doing half marathons in our 70s), we're putting it off as long as we can. Being in a condo where there is little or nothing do worry about for outside maintenance is a big help.

We have watched several of our neighbors live independently until their 90s, so that's another fact supporting our decision. Never say never, but we're just not there yet.

My job took me into these places several times a week. Not just the run of the mill ones but some of the most expensive ones in my state.

The atmosphere in all of them struck me as people waiting around to die.

No thank you.

 

[LARS]

My job took me into these places several times a week. Not just the run of the mill ones but some of the most expensive ones in my state.

The atmosphere in all of them struck me as people waiting around to die.

No thank you.

The challenge in managing this process of aging is, of course, the unknown.

We'd all like to be Malcom Forbes, go to bed one night no doubt after a spectacular dinner, and die in our sleep.

Problem is you cannot plan on being that lucky…

 

[Music Lover]

My job took me into these places several times a week. Not just the run of the mill ones but some of the most expensive ones in my state.

The atmosphere in all of them struck me as people waiting around to die.

No thank you.

They're CCRC homes...they're not homes for young, healthy and active retirees. I doubt any of the residents prefer to be there instead of living independently.

 

[BubbaChris]

My father refused to consider even an Assisted Living facility even though their 2-story home was more and more dangerous for him and my mother. He died 7 years ago (luckily from nothing related to poor judgement) and we initially moved my mother 2 doors down from my sister in a mobile home park.

My mom wasn't in great shape at the start, and continued to decline to the point my sister needed 3rd-party help. Two and a half years later I moved her to assisted living a few miles from me for a couple more years of a smooth-ish glide to the point of hospice care. A fall required surgery, rehab, then a move to skilled nursing before she was on hospice care again.

The 5.25 years after my father passed consumed roughly $400K of her assets beyond what her portion of his pension covered. The second half of that time was in a LCOL area, and the pension always covered basic rent plus some extras.

FIL on the other hand followed his girlfriend into a CCRC (separate apartments) and eventually moved between their levels of care as dementia set in, then took him.

Both my mother and my FIL benefitted from the social side of being in an appropriate facility. And family members were able to focus on more valuable things than chasing down small home repairs.

As a result, DW and I could easily see us going to Assisted Living or into a CCRC after our initial go-go years. We're encouraged by the fact multiple new facilities have opened in our community since we moved here 9 years ago.

Best regards,
Chris

 

[tmm99]

My mom lives alone on the 2nd floor of an apartment building with no elevators. She's 93. She moved there when she was in her 80s and chose the upstairs unit on purpose thinking it would keep her legs strong. I didn't get the logic and I still don't, but she's still there. She still walks every day to get groceries, etc. Her sister calls her on the phone once a day to chat with her and to make sure she's doing OK. Her next-door neighbour takes care of her trash and my mom cooks/packs meals for her twice a week in exchange.

She tells me she wants to die before she has to move into a care facility. She says she hates to be around old people.

I don't think I'll be so lucky, but I don't particularly enjoy being surrounded by old people either. I have nothing against people my age, but I just don't want everyone around me to be around my age/older. Having said that, I know that if I became frail, I would have no choice. It's like if you got sick and got admitted to a hospital, you'd naturally be surrounded by sick people.

But until I have no choice, I want to hang out with people of all ages.

 

[Teacher Terry]

I didn’t mind or resent helping my parents stay in their apartment until they died. My aunt recently died at 96 and needed limited help from her daughter until she went to a facility shortly before she died. My parents did the same for all the grandparents. Depending on the circumstances of course there’s a big difference from needing some help to keep living independently to needing it constantly at which point a institution is required unless you can afford round the clock home care. I would venture to guess that the quality of one’s childhood might directly correlate to the willingness of adult children to help their parents.

 

[ChrisC]

DW and I are both turned off by the residents we see at CCRCs. They always appear to be a few years from the end, and we just can't see ourselves in that group. Since we're still both very healthy (doing half marathons in our 70s), we're putting it off as long as we can. Being in a condo where there is little or nothing do worry about for outside maintenance is a big help.

We have watched several of our neighbors live independently until their 90s, so that's another fact supporting our decision. Never say never, but we're just not there yet.

We're 68 and 70, and decided to go on the waitlist for a CCRC in our area that functions more like a luxurious resort or cruise ship than a hospital waiting room, though there is a sizeable nursing care wing. We went on the waiting list pre-Covid and it's a 4 year waitlist with an option for those to renew their spot on the waitlist for another 4 years. Covid has made us re-think our preferences at this CCRC, which has single family homes (cottages) and apartments (villas). This is an equity business model CCRC, with residents owning their units, which we prefer. Our Plan A is to age in place -- we currently live in a great, diverse neighborhood, mixed with a few retirees and lots of working stiff couples, and an array of young children who bring lots of joy to our eyes during events like Halloween! Our home is ideal for aging in place; it was customized by the original owner for his handicapped child, with two master bedrooms down, and one of them is handicapped fitted. If we had live-in home care, we have ample space to accomodate that. We also have good LTCi. We really enjoy our current home and it's large enough to have all our children and grandchildren stay comfortably with us during the holidays.

Our Plan B, which we might activate in 4-6 years, is to move into the CCRC we're waitlisted. If we moved into this CCRC, we would likely be among the youngest ones on the campus, but this is more a function of the age of the CCRC itself and the classes of residents that have preceded us. If we move into this CCRC, we'd be likely be in a class of move-in residents that are our ages and likely be similarly situated in fitness and health. We've been studying the new entrants/residents that come into this CCRC (around 30 each year) and they mostly look like our ages! And if we were to move into this CCRC, as we age, the classes of new residents coming into this CCRC, would be younger than us.

We realized this important facet of CCRC living when we went to a recent presentation to a new CCRC in our area that is scheduled to open in 2024, and is now taking deposits for the 125 unit facility. The presenters mentioned that the "class" of first residents would likely be of the same ages, 72-76, and grow with each other, unlike established CCRCs where the resident population is much older given the durational stays of residents who came into these CCRCs when first built many years ago.

 

[Turbo29]

They're CCRC homes...they're not homes for young, healthy and active retirees. I doubt any of the residents prefer to be there instead of living independently.

Most of them had Independent Living, Assisted Living, Nursing home care, and sometimes Memory care. Many people paid large amounts in the millions to buy in to the nicer ones at the independent stage. So they want to be there.

Don't get me wrong, many of them (especially the upscale ones) were extremely nice. They all had that atmosphere though. Maybe that says more about me than them, meaning that I wouldn't be happy living in one.

 

[BarbWire]

As someone who flies "solo" in this world -- no near reliable relatives in the USA -- alas a CCRC is probably in my future at some date.

I had experience with an elderly and dear widowed neighbor whom I visited in her CCRC (she professed to love it), but it was not my cup of tea.

For me the biggest stumbling block I see to this necessity is having a "responsible party" contact who is phoned whenever the resident falls, has medical issues, etc. My nearest reliable family are not in the USA. Not sure who I would put down. The friends who are my current "emergency contact" folks are older than I.

 

[Music Lover]

Most of them had Independent Living, Assisted Living, Nursing home care, and sometimes Memory care. Many people paid large amounts in the millions to buy in to the nicer ones at the independent stage. So they want to be there.

Don't get me wrong, many of them (especially the upscale ones) were extremely nice. They all had that atmosphere though. Maybe that says more about me than them, meaning that I wouldn't be happy living in one.

They want to be there because it's better than the alternative.

I get your point though, I don't want to go into one either. But at some point unless I die in my sleep moving somewhere that provides assistance is inevitable. I very much doubt that I'll go from living independently in my house directly to the graveyard.

 

[Walt34]

I very much doubt that I'll go from living independently in my house directly to the graveyard.

That's the issue in one sentence. Everyone would like to go that way, but only the lucky few (relatively speaking) do so.

 

[nwsteve]

That's the issue in one sentence. Everyone would like to go that way, but only the lucky few (relatively speaking) do so.

Since this a CCRC thread, it is worthwhile to remind all that in most cases and certainly for all Type A properties, you must be healthy to get into most CCRCs

 

[harllee]

Since this a CCRC thread, it is worthwhile to remind all that in most cases and certainly for all Type A properties, you must be healthy to get into most CCRCs

So true. The Type A CCRC where DH and I plan to move has pretty strict entrance requirements. They can afford to be picky, they have a 10 year wait list. You have to pass a physical and cognitive test to get in. There are certain physical conditions that will disqualify you--if you have had cancer (other than skin cancer) within 5 years you are disqualified. MS and Parkinsons will disqualify you. We know several people who could not get in when they applied because they were not healthy enough. In the case of one of our good friends, the husband was accepted but the wife was not so they had to look elsewhere. Bottom line, don't wait too long to go to the CCRC--if your health declines you might not be able to get in.