Ex Colleague Passed Away

[easysurfer]

Feeling a bit moody the past few days as I found out recently that an former colleague passed away a few months ago. I haven't spoke to this person in about 20 years.

But looking back, nearly just starting my career I remember working together "down in the trenches" as they say, on several key projects.

Perhaps, also this is noticing my own mortality. Fast forward to the present several of the former colleagues from back then have passed away.

 

[Spock]

It never hits me as recognizing my own mortality. More of a wishing we'd kept in touch.
But I'm finding trying to keep in touch is futile now days, for me anyway, unless it is only on the absolute most trivial of connections. Nobody seems to want to "lets do lunch" any more (ignoring the virus). Its all trival BS on Facebook with no real relationship any more.

 

[jollystomper]

As I clean out my old work stuff, I come across items from former colleagues who have died. Congratulatory letters, presentations/articles we co-authored, pictures, handwritten notes. All reminders to not take time for granted.

 

[MichaelB]

A former collegue of mine has a website, one of the things he does is chronicle the deaths of all of our former workmates. It’s a long list, and sad, as many die at a relatively young age.

 

[REWahoo]

A former collegue of mine has a website, one of the things he does is chronicle the deaths of all of our former workmates. It’s a long list, and sad, as many die at a relatively young age.

Along similar lines, a high school classmate keeps track of all 72 of our graduating class, sending out emails of the obituary whenever we lose someone. Got one of those emails last week.

Now that we are in our 70's, they are becoming more frequent.

 

[Souschef]

At one time I joined an alumni group on line of people I worked with some 25 years ago. I finally dropped out as it was depressing to see the names of all the former coworkers that had passed away.

 

[Mr._Graybeard]

A handful of colleagues died in their 50s only months apart. Ironically, several prided themselves on their physical fitness, and a couple had their fatal attacks in their basement gyms.

A woman I worked with was an arts reporter who had grown disgruntled with management but enjoyed a "dream job" that enabled her to rub elbows with the stars. After years of quiet grumbling to me (and, I'm sure, others), she retired at the same time I did -- only to die a couple weeks later. Was job stress a factor? Who knows.

 

[Moemg]

I have a group of women that I lunch with on Friday .Every year one of the members die .It is so depressing .

 

[Z3Dreamer]

3 ladies I dated in high school or college have passed. I am not good at describing my feelings, but whatever my feelings were when I heard of their passing, they were not good.

 

[martyp]

I was visiting the US last September and I meant to meet up with one of my former employees but just didn't get the chance. A month after I returned home (Bangkok) I found out that he died during that time I was visiting the US. It was a bit of shock. I had met up with him a year before. He had been considering retiring but got a project offer he couldn't refuse. He was a bit a workaholic and he was very athletic. He loved to go windsurfing. I don't know what the cause of death was though the death notice made it sound like it was an illness and not an accident. He was about the same age as me. His example and a few others make me grateful that I chose to retire at 55 (10 years ago) and enjoy life.

 

[DrRoy]

About a year ago I heard that someone from my high school class had died. I did not know until then, that we had the same birthday.

 

[atmsmshr]

Workplace had nearly 1,000. Death of a physically fit same age co-worker was a wakeup and I retired within 6 months. Our alumni FB page is a steady drumbeat of passing.

 

[MRG]

It's sad how many people who passed in the last 7 years since I left the workplace. It's truly depressing how many people have passed.

I find myself thinking of folks I'd worked for and with in my past and realize many have passed away that I never knew about.

 

[Dash man]

Back when I was stationed in the UK while in the Air Force, I received a reunion notice that included a list of class members who had passed away. The name that stood out to me was my own!

A few weeks ago I learned of an old girlfriend that had passed away fifteen years ago at age 48. That hit me hard.

 

[REWahoo]

Back when I was stationed in the UK while in the Air Force, I received a reunion notice that included a list of class members who had passed away. The name that stood out to me was my own!

This is why I lament the demise of daily newspapers. Setting a Google alert for my name + obituary just isn't the same as looking for it every morning over a cup of coffee.

 

[Arizona1]

A pretty good friend in the Air Force retired and had a party that night. Died after the party during that night. He was in a little less than average condition but was only 42yo. He used to like to have a plate of French fries with ketchup on top for lunch.

 

[ExFlyBoy5]

A few weeks ago I learned of an old girlfriend that had passed away fifteen years ago at age 48. That hit me hard.

There was a gal I dated in HS for a bit. Romantically, we didn't really hit it off, but we remained good friends for many years after HS. About a year ago a friend asked if I had heard about her dying. I had not. A quick Google search verified this and there was a blog she had written chronicling her battle with an aggressive blood cancer. Towards the end (within a couple weeks of her dying) her desperation and frustration towards the medical system was one of the most depressing things I have ever, EVER read. I was/am still so mad at myself for not keeping up with a really fantastic person who led a pretty interesting life.

A pretty good friend in the Air Force retired and had a party that night. Died after the party during that night. He was in a little less than average condition but was only 42yo. He used to like to have a plate of French fries with ketchup on top for lunch.

I am in my mid 40's and have had way too many former fly buddies pass away from cancer way too young. It's depressing and scary in many ways and certainly is a reminder that our time here is extremely limited.

 

[Chuckanut]

I'm sorry for your loss.

Like many, I have mourned the loss friends at ages far lower than what I am now at.

 

[Mr._Graybeard]

There was a gal I dated in HS for a bit. Romantically, we didn't really hit it off, but we remained good friends for many years after HS. About a year ago a friend asked if I had heard about her dying. I had not. A quick Google search verified this and there was a blog she had written chronicling her battle with an aggressive blood cancer. Towards the end (within a couple weeks of her dying) her desperation and frustration towards the medical system was one of the most depressing things I have ever, EVER read.

A guy I knew from childhood died of a brain tumor and tracked his treatment (and ultimate death) in a blog titled "my big fat Greek cancer." He was clear about the sense of abandonment he felt when the medical system ran through their range of standard treatments and, when they didn't work, gave up.

 

[Koolau]

A guy I knew from childhood died of a brain tumor and tracked his treatment (and ultimate death) in a blog titled "my big fat Greek cancer." He was clear about the sense of abandonment he felt when the medical system ran through their range of standard treatments and, when they didn't work, gave up.

I found the blog (I assume it's the same one). It sounds like the experience of a (female) friend (half of a close-friend couple.)

Her experience mirrors your friend's experience. She lived about 14 months post diagnosis. We were all outraged when her cancer treatment "team" forced her to travel from Hawaii to (state withheld to protect the guilty) - only to be told they couldn't help her any more! She was in bad shape for travel, but still held out hope until sitting down with the "team." Had it been my wife, violence would have erupted. I won't mention the center as even mention of the state might reveal it. Suffice to say, you HAVE heard of it - and how wonderful it is!.

It has amazed me that human beings can become so callous (and unless I miss my guess - greedy) to cause such unneeded suffering in a person's final couple of months of life. I say greedy because, naturally, they don't get paid much for a simple phone call stating "we can't help you any more." They wouldn't even go through her local doc but insisted on a "sit down." I didn't talk to my surviving friend about the "money" angle. I didn't want to add to his pain. Fortunately, he had good insurance - though, ultimately, we ALL pay for such a callous act of (maybe) greed. Any docs or "team members" want to set me straight on why such a horrible deed was perpetrated on a kindly soul in her final stages of life? Maybe better not - I wouldn't buy it anyway. Naturally, YMMV.

Returning you know to the actual topic (my condolences to OP on his loss. It's becoming pretty routine for me as well. I just try to think back on the good times.)

 

[Amethyst]

Quite a few of the nice people from work have died. The mean people seem determined to live forever, from what I can see.

 

[Markola]

Interesting how several people in this string referenced dead friends who were fitness oriented.

 

[mystang52]

Facebook page of my fellow 1969 HS grads has a running list. We were a large (Brooklyn, NY) class, but to see how many have passed is still shocking.

 

[Dtail]

Interesting how several people in this string referenced dead friends who were fitness oriented.

Hey, James Fixx, father of modern running died of a heart attack at 50.
Sometimes it's just your time.
All the more reason to retire early and enjoy life.

 

[RonBoyd]

Now that we are in our 70's, they are becoming more frequent.

Yeah, get used to it. The older you get the more common it becomes... until it stops.