For those who have open communication with your family about money, how much will you

[marko]

A lot of people on MM plan on retiring early on a bare bones budget. Supporting their parents would definitely throw a wrench into their plans....

As Warren Buffett says "when the tide goes out you see who's swimming naked".

I'd say that true FI should be able to absorb or adjust to such a hit. A lot of folks out there gleefully proclaiming FI when, just like many in the working world, are one small expense away from not being able to hang on.

 

[RxMan]

My brother and I are blessed to have loving parents who raised us to be independent and financially secure. I don’t speak about specifics with my parents on their financial situation but they are living a comfortable and happy retirement.

My father was a lawyer and he spent a lot of time planning their estate and spelling out their will. The rather detailed document is at my parent’s home. While neither my brother nor myself knows any details what we don’t have to worry about is what they wanted which is a gift in itself.

I’ve told my dad that he should enjoy retirement and spend their money to enjoy life with mom. When they had their mountain cottage he would joke that “we’re spending your inheritance” any time they’d spend money making improvements. They’ve recently sold that cottage so I think the plan for them now is to travel a little more.

My wife’s family has some money related to her grandfather and my FIL owns a business. My wife has no idea what/if anything will be coming to her or her sisters.

We’re both of the mindset that our parents don’t owe us anything that might be left. As it stands now I could never repay my parents for all they’ve done for me. That is their legacy more than any money they might have accumulated.

I hope my parents live so long they can spend all they’ve accumulated. I would gladly pay for their final expenses. I’m sure though my parents have been smart with money and will pass something on to myself and my brother. That’s what I expect and hopefully that is still many happy years from now.

 

[marko]

When my oft-mentioned grandfather was alive, if it wasn't for money, we'd have nothing to talk about!

Investments, taxes, rates, trusts, disclosures, stocks, interest, dividends, his money, my money, family money, wills, legalities on and on.

In a way, he was kind of boring that way; maybe he was just lonely.

 

[imoldernu]

@ age 83, we're at the other end of the question.

My kids all have copies of our will, and we update them on our financial situation on a regular basis. Not that much to distribute, but have full support and agreement for our wishes.

A very happy extended family that stays in touch daily. Four sons who get along as best friends.

 

[athena53]

My guess is that my 88-year old widowed Dad has about $500K in investments; I haven't seen the bottom line since he asked me about 8 years ago how to calculate an IRR in Excel. It will be split among my 4 siblings and me, so nit life-changing. Whatever I get will go into the grandkids' 529 accounts. Dad knows that and is happy with it.

DS and DDIL know my bottom line, which WOULD be life-changing for them, but they're frugal and live a pretty modest life. I can't see them going hog-wild with the windfall. My main priority is making sure I have options if I become old and frail that don't thrust them into a caregiving role.

 

[KB]

My parents were born in the early 1920s and had the traditional Husband does the finances and Wife doesn't really know much about them. My Dad always kept my sister and me appraised with a list of his assets and the dollar amounts. That list helped me find all his accounts when he died last year. I had been added to his two financial accounts a few months before he fell ill, which helped.

Since my adult children received a copy of the will and inherited a percentage of my parents estate, it was pretty clear how much I inherited also.

So, I will be doing the same. Listing my accounts with enough information to access one of them and contact the others. Both of my children live out of the country so I want to make it as easy as possible for them. I will probably add them (or one of them) to my Vanguard account to give them easier access to change the account for distribution.

Since they inherited a nice chunk of money from my parents, they are learning how to handle it in advance of inheriting more from me. Hopefully by the time they inherit my estate, they will be wiser.

 

[Vacation4us]

Mom will most likely out live us all. Otherwise I will receive 1/4 of few million. House alone is worth 2 mill. Since mom has the longevity gene and we are our fathers children I don’t count on seeing any of it.

 

[Sunset]

We did not have open communication but my father had me type up a paper that said a certain stock that he owned would be given to my sister and I upon his death. The rest of his estate went to his second wife.
After he passed she tried to hide the total amount of that stock holding by turning over only the certificates that he had not the stock account. We froze the account so no one could transfer out funds but it took a year to get settled. The amount turned out to be more then expected . It was about a third of what my portfolio was at the time $145,000.So very helpful to me but not a make or break on my totals. If I had known it would not have changed how much I was setting aside. I always worried about my future and stashed away what I could.

There was a phrase "per stirpes" that I did not recognize. He joked that it was so my sister and I did not kill each other off, but also said since I did not have children that she would inherit anyway. Somehow that hurt my feelings so much that I never appreciated the inheritance and have been frustrated trying to untangle myself from it.

Your MIL sounds like a greedy horrible person.

As for the "per stirpes", that phrase is a common legal term in Wills, as I'm sure you looked up. It really protected both of your offspring if you had any later after the Will was written.

You Dad's joking way of referring to it, was poorly chosen words for sure, and not actually accurate.

Assume you and your Sister both died before your Dad.
When he died.
You would not inherit anything as you are dead first.
Same for your Sister. (this is where your Dad was inaccurate).
However, since your Sister had children it protected her share by passing her share on to her children.

Since I joke with my kids, you have made me wonder if I might have said something to hurt her feelings, when explaining to DD about something she will inherit... I will have to ask her.

 

[Sunset]

As for us inheriting.
Way too early to tell, and doesn't matter.
Never count your chickens before they hatch is how I live.

 

[morriss003]

Long ago I heard my aunt complain that my grandfather was spending their inheritance. I replied that he was spending HIS money, and that her inheritance would be what was left over after he was through spending. I'll probably inherit something from my mother, but with six kids in the family it won't be a lot. My wife and I are probably better off than 90% of the people on this planet, so I don't worry about it.

 

[jjuneau]

In what country can any house that is still standing sell for as little as $50k?

 

[morriss003]

In what country can any house that is still standing sell for as little as $50k?

Try the USA. https://www.countryliving.com/real-estate/g2143/50-houses-under-50k/

 

[aaronc879]

In what country can any house that is still standing sell for as little as $50k?

All of them including the US. You may have to get out of your rich bubble every once in a while and see how the rest of the world lives including much of the US. There are houses around me that sometimes go for under $50K and I live in a decent area with low crime. Go to large cities in high crime areas and most houses are under $50K.

 

[Teacher Terry]

Wichita, Kansas is one place.

 

[target2019]

2,827 houses for sale near Jacksonville FL under $50,000.

 

[Finance Dave]

Our family is very tight lipped.

My dad passed away 4 years ago and I was managing his finances at that time...so I knew every detail of what he had...but he never discussed his will. Died suddenly, left everything to his wife (my stepmother). She gave each of us kids $10,000 and is now giving each of us up to the gift limit (I think it's $15k) annually but has told us she re-evaluates annually and will give when she can afford (which should be most years unless she lives to be VERY old).

I don't plan on getting any more...so when I do get $15k we spend it on something nice like a vacation and I know my dad would be happy about that.

 

[nancyfrank232]

All of them including the US. You may have to get out of your rich bubble every once in a while and see how the rest of the world lives including much of the US. There are houses around me that sometimes go for under $50K and I live in a decent area with low crime. Go to large cities in high crime areas and most houses are under $50K.

But where are those $50k houses actually near an influx of jobs and in-migration?

You won’t find $50k homes in Elm Grove/Brookfield or Whitefish Bay

 

[iloveyoga]

In what country can any house that is still standing sell for as little as $50k?

Des Moines, Iowa. Small house with a decent yard and a nice two car garage. My friend recently bought, did some minor renos and it looks very nice.

 

[Dtail]

2,827 houses for sale near Jacksonville FL under $50,000.

Not sure where that is, but in many VCOL places in FLA, one gets all the other stuff that goes with low housing.
There are houses for ~60k which are 5-10 miles from the beach in Wext Pasco county, FLA. Sounds good except your neighbors might be running meth labs from the house, not to mention high crime rates.

 

[target2019]

Not sure where that is, but in many VCOL places in FLA, one gets all the other stuff that goes with low housing.
There are houses for ~60k which are 5-10 miles from the beach in Wext Pasco county, FLA. Sounds good except your neighbors might be running meth labs from the house, not to mention high crime rates.

Jacksonville FL 32210

 

[jazz4cash]

In what country can any house that is still standing sell for as little as $50k?

I must’ve missed something. What is the basis for this question? It doesn’t seem relevant to the topic.

 

[nancyfrank232]

Not sure where that is, but in many VCOL places in FLA, one gets all the other stuff that goes with low housing.

You don’t know where Jacksonville, FL is? It’s the most populous city in FL and the largest city by area, in the USA

Sounds good except your neighbors might be running meth labs from the house, not to mention high crime rates.

Not necessarily true. Depends on how far off the target home price is relative to the median. If the house is $50k and the median in the city is $55k then it’s less likely to be a “meth lab” in a “high crime” area, and more likely to be just a typical house. Add a “0” to the price of the median home and the odds increase

 

[PatrickA5]

My brother and I got a smallish inheritance when my dad died last year. He managed on SS and a small pension for over 40 years. My suggestions to lighten up on the scrimpyness never took hold. Even at 97, he would cut coupons and only buy items on sale.

FIL has money. We aren't counting on a penny. DW and I are convinced that the reason he has an extra cemetery plot is to bury his money next to him.

We haven't talked with our kids about how much money we have, but we have everything arranged and the kids know where to find the information. We'll probably open up a bit more about actual amounts on down the road.

 

[Cayman]

We don't plan on a dime.
Relatives do.

 

[Dtail]

You don’t know where Jacksonville, FL is? It’s the most populous city in FL and the largest city by area, in the USA

I know where Jacksonville is. A little common sense is to be used in that there are parts of Jacksonville which are seedier than other parts and thus my question.


Not necessarily true. Depends on how far off the target home price is relative to the median. If the house is $50k and the median in the city is $55k then it’s less likely to be a “meth lab” in a “high crime” area, and more likely to be just a typical house. Add a “0” to the price of the median home and the odds increase

A nice theoretical response, but just not true in my example.
Go check out all the different sections of New Port Richey, Hudson and other West Pasco county areas.