Hi Steven. Your thread title caught my eye, because I find myself much more interested in the psychosocial aspects of retirement than the financial ones (which get most of the press). Here are a few thoughts...
I gotcha. I can see how some of those responses don't feel very helpful. I don't know the context/relationships, so I'm not in the position to give any advice, but I'll just share what I would say (in my own head, at least) to each of those responses.
"What are you going to do?" If I want to be flip, I'll just say "Whatever I want." If the question is sincere and I feel like going deeper, I talk about how I'm enjoying the freedom of retirement, and I'll mention a few of the things I do to occupy my time -- take classes, read, watch Youtube, walk my dog, enjoy the outdoors, etc.
That could be true for some of the other responses, too. Maybe you hear a disapproving tone in the questions, whereas I'm just seeing them written out as simple questions, so I'm giving simple answers. If the person is genuinely conveying disapproval in their tone/attitude, then that's more complicated.
I'm not that way, though. I've always had plenty of interests outside of work, and I never based my identity too much on my career. In many ways, it was a relief for me to slough off that professional identity. It felt like a bit of a straightjacket.
Sometimes it's an internal thing. We have spent so much time inhaling society's definition of what it means to be a man, the problem is internalized; it's now on the inside, not the outside. So then it's a matter of working with our attitudes -- reminding ourselves that our worth as a human being does not derive from our productivity or paycheck.
Good luck to you. Welcome to the forum.