There seems to be some universal paradox in giving. I have noticed something similar trying to help individuals and NGOs in SE Asia. My wife and I paid the rent for a school for very poor kids that would have gone under had we not supported it, because we felt so bad for the kids. But no matter who you try to help, you are never be seen as a hero, but rather as a patsy. We were stretched giving this, but there was never an honest thanks, just telling us how much more was needed.
I found out later to my disappointment, that the guy running the school even belittled our contribution, telling the teachers there that I got it all back from the U.S. government, so it really was costing me nothing. Of course it was 100% after tax money, you can't even declare this kind of donation on your taxes. The idea was not something like "Thank you for helping us so much", but rather, something like "If you can give this, you must have more, why do you give so little?"
I found out later, that the people there in general have NO respect for the foreigners who come and open an NGO (Charity), or who give money, none whatsoever. They see them just as easy marks. I suspect this is true for the family members one tries to help also. The more you help, the less you are respected.
What I found out they DO respect however, is businesses and a job. Foreigners who come there and open a business, and make them work hard and pay them an honest wage. They do respect these people.
Families, charities, political parties, whomever, once you help out, you looked down upon for not helping more. Now I know why so many people give anonymously.