What is your pet peeve of the day? -- 2021

[Gumby]

The day isn't done. One of my pet peeves is declaring a winner before the contest is over.

And one of my peeves is people who cling to the faintest of hopes when the outcome is clear.

 

[mountainsoft]

I'm peeved at myself for getting involved in arguments on the internet.

I try not to participate in arguments, but sometimes my responses are viewed differently than I intend, despite my efforts not to offend anyone.

So, I'm trying to keep my personal opinions and viewpoints to myself. "Momma always told me if you don't have something nice to say, don't say nothin at all".

Lately I have caught myself writing long replies to a variety of topics. I read it back, doing my best to edit it down. Then I read again, removing some sections, rewording others. Read through again... And again. In the end, I just cancel out of the message and move on to something else without posting. What a waste of time.

I almost responded to the leggings posts... Nope. Don't go there.

Same with a long response I wrote and cancelled out of on Facebook yesterday. Nope, don't do it.

Be slow to talk and quick to listen.

 

[Major Tom]

Best post of the day.

Absolutely the very best post ever!

I am now feeling the need for a good dose of moderation, to reign in this most unseemly behavior

 

[Major Tom]

I just thought of another peeve. I'm on a roll here! Another thing that bugs me is websites that are more concerned with "creating an aesthetic" than actually being easy to use. Thanks to another thread in these forums, I was just looking at the websites of several CCRC companies. On visiting the site of each provider, one of my first questions was where their locations are. On one site, I couldn't find a tab that said "Locations". After a few minutes, I figured out that it was under the tab named "Collection". I guess that in the thinking of the site designer, it was thought that the company should think of their various facilities as being a "collection", in the same way that an art aficionado might have a collection of pieces, or a music fan might have a collection of vinyl or CD's. Trouble is, for the average user, it makes the site harder to use.

This sort of thing is typical of a lot of corporate sites. They are so keen to stand out from the competition, that they try to brand themselves with a website that has a "cool and swishy" aesthetic. I much prefer "straightforward and functional". I go to these sorts of sites to get information, and not to be impressed by how cool they are.

 

[Jerry1]

Well my PP related to CCRC’s is how they don’t give you any sense of their cost structure. Just come in for a tour. If that’s not high pressure sales, I don’t know what is. Problem is, I thought they all had waiting lists. Why the need for the high pressure sales technique?

 

[Major Tom]

+1 Jerry1. I am very wary about doing business with anyone who cannot give me a price, or at least a price range, upfront.

 

[Souschef]

+1 Jerry1. I am very wary about doing business with anyone who cannot give me a price, or at least a price range, upfront.

I agree. I keep getting mail from one cruise line, sometimes with a "check" for $1000. But you cannot find a price on their web site or in their brochure.
I guess it is one of those,"If you have to ask the price you cannot afford it".

 

[Major Tom]

I guess it is one of those, "If you have to ask the price you cannot afford it".

I interpret it more as, "If you have to ask, then you are not foolish enough for fall for our less-than-honest sales tactics."

 

[Koolau]

Well my PP related to CCRC’s is how they don’t give you any sense of their cost structure. Just come in for a tour. If that’s not high pressure sales, I don’t know what is. Problem is, I thought they all had waiting lists. Why the need for the high pressure sales technique?

I've toured 4 facilities - 2 of which were CCRCs (the others were primarily assisted living.) I too was a bit surprised that they put any pressure since there were, as you mentioned, waiting lists. BUT all of them were very up front about their pricing structures. One even provided history of price increases at my request. I did have the impression that the "front office" wanted to keep that waiting list long. IIRC the young woman who worked with us at one CCRC mentioned over 100 people on the list but also about a year waiting list. My simple math suggested that they must cycle through a lot of people in a year so they want a long list. Apparently, folks in the facility must leave/die often or folks on the list must "reject" acceptance often. We were told that we could get on the list and then not accept a place in the facility BUT remain on the list (at the top.) Sounded a bit high pressure but subtle.

It was clear that, like most things that deal with medical care, prices are rising faster than inflation (not sure in the past year when base inflation has been on a tear.)

One thing that did surprise me is that they were relatively open about the issues of getting on the waiting list and getting "approved." They didn't hammer the issue, but pointed out that one had to qualify financially (no problem) AND physically. IOW a medical review would be conducted to be certain a resident wouldn't move to the care wing right away. As it turns out, I'm sure I NOW no longer qualify for a CCRC though an assisted living facility would take me. (They kick you out when you need more care.)

So, getting qualified and "on the list" probably is a good idea if anyone is truly interested. I could just never get my head around living in "one of those places" (lovely as they are.) I've determined that between DW and I, we may be able to care for each other and THEN hire assistance as needed. It's expensive, but we will not have been "wasting" money in a facility years before we need the extra assistance.

One thing I'll have to say is that every facility (from assisted to CCRC) that I've visited, the folks seemed very happy to be there. The exception was seeing the "warehouse" (my description) of the final stage of the CCRC process for some folks. That was depressing and we were only given a glance of it (privacy issues, you see.)

CCRCs are a big decision. Not to be entered into lightly. But I'm sure many of them are very nice and worth the money to remove the worry about old age living. YMMV

 

[pdxgal]

I just thought of another peeve. I'm on a roll here! Another thing that bugs me is websites that are more concerned with "creating an aesthetic" than actually being easy to use. Thanks to another thread in these forums, I was just looking at the websites of several CCRC companies. On visiting the site of each provider, one of my first questions was where their locations are. On one site, I couldn't find a tab that said "Locations". After a few minutes, I figured out that it was under the tab named "Collection". .....Trouble is, for the average user, it makes the site harder to use.

This sort of thing is typical of a lot of corporate sites. They are so keen to stand out from the competition, that they try to brand themselves with a website that has a "cool and swishy" aesthetic.

What you describe is a sign of companies not being customer-focused. If they were, they would make sure the user experience was a good one. In the context of a CCRC, an unclear website is really a bad sign, especially given the customer demographic.

Reminds me of my days at megacorp health insurance. The web designers came up with a slick "fresh" design for the Medicare insurance pages. Lots of soothing pastel colors. Only problem was there wasn't enough color contrast to meet Medicare's requirements for readability. Megacorp had to pay a big fine to the gummint. Doh!

 

[Pellice]

Perhaps avoid looking at subjects that drives you to "tell it like it is." I have found myself doing this as well, even though I know I am not ever going to change anyone's thinking.

While I think Eddie's conclusion is valid: Internet arguments drain you - I have to admit that MY mind has been changed by an internet squabble. Perhaps because it was a peripheral subject - wingsuit flying I was opining that the wingsuit cliff flyers "should" be able to find joy in some less dangerous activity. But responses to my and similar comments gradually convinced me that perhaps the activity wasn't just stupid and ridiculous. I owned up to my change of heart in the comments, and vowed to be less judgemental of others' interests.

But, I suppose it's revealing that I can't think of any other examples where MY mind was changed, although I've become more circumspect. Que scais-je? was the motto of Montaigne, what do I know?

 

[Pellice]

I just thought of another peeve. I'm on a roll here! Another thing that bugs me is websites that are more concerned with "creating an aesthetic" than actually being easy to use.

Absolutely agree with you 100%. Overuse of photographs!! I'm a birder, and visit a lot of birding websites. Gradually they've all succumbed to the dull monotony of web designers' advice to "draw people in" with a large photo, ideally featuring young people smiling and rejoicing and on the move while doing something vaguely like birdwatching.

I want an address, I want a phone number, I want a copious and clear menu bar across the top, I want a text box that changes regularly with some interesting insight, I want a calendar box linked to various areas in the state. I could care less about the giant blue jay photo with a child gazing up in awe. What's the goal here? To best serve information to users. What do users want from the websie? What makes them come back?

 

[Chuckanut]

While I think Eddie's conclusion is valid: Internet arguments drain you - I have to admit that MY mind has been changed by an internet squabble.

I suspect that if I sat down face-to-face over a coffee or beer with those I have disagreed with, the vast majority of times we would find the differences are minor and could be overcome.

 

[FindingForward]

Lately I have caught myself writing long replies to a variety of topics. I read it back, doing my best to edit it down. Then I read again, removing some sections, rewording others. Read through again... And again. In the end, I just cancel out of the message and move on to something else without posting. What a waste of time.

Ha! I thought I was the only crazy person who did this.

 

[MRG]

Ignorant people. DW has connected with her old HS girlfriend from our hometown. We left the area 44 years ago when we were 21 for opportunities and seldom go or look back.

Her girlfriend sent her a video of night-time construction being done on a pipeline across a creek I used to fish in and this girl grew up there. She's adamant this is illegal activity putting a pipeline across the creek and that's why the crews working at night! It's been a long time since I fished there but there were several pipelines that crossed the creek. All legally installed. Who knew companies could build pipelines without approval or oversight just by doing the construction at night?

 

[jollystomper]

I suspect that if I sat down face-to-face over a coffee or beer with those I have disagreed with, the vast majority of times we would find the differences are minor and could be overcome.

I have had the good fortune to have done this several times. Every time, the other person and I have found we have more areas of agreement than differences, and the differences are about ways to achieve a similar goal.

Unfortunately only about 1 in 5 folks I have extended such an invite to have accepted.

 

[EastWest Gal]

Noisy, annoying Halloween decorations.

We have a new neighbor across the street. He is divorced and has two young kids, obviously shared custody. He's not home much. Seems like a nice guy. He's put out some fun and tasteful Halloween decorations, which is not the problem.

He has a motion sensing device that plays chains and moaning. This started two weeks ago. It goes off about every three minutes some days. I think it is triggered by birds, squirrels, and falling leaves, as well as passing cars. We are having spectacular weather, and I like to leave the windows open. It is extremely annoying. Will I say anything? Not this year. Maybe in the future.

 

[EastWest Gal]

Haven't looked back to see if other air-travel PPs, but my recent flight reminded me how much I have Pet Peeves over:

1) Carry on luggage: The air lines keep shrinking the size of the acceptable carry ons. But that's not my PP. Apparently, they don't even look at what folks are bringing on. I watched a few hundred folks boarding my various flights and many (most?) are bringing carry-ons MUCH bigger than "allowed" and many more than allowed. Most folks come onto the aircraft pulling a "standard" carry-on (probably the older ones which are now a couple of inches too big each way) AND wearing a back pack as well. As a "personal item" that weighs 25 lbs that must be carried on the back seems a bit much. I'm guessing the total weight of carry on most folks now carry approaches 45 or 50 pounds. So every flight is problematic finding space to place carry ons in overheads. If you get there first (DW and I mercifully are allowed - so far - to pre-board because we require "extra time" due to physical conditions.) Others end up putting their carry-ons any where they can find space. Upon exit, they wait until the plane empties so they can go retrieve their carry-on.

2) Folks who use back packs have no sense of personal space. Air craft are crowded places and aisles are narrow. As back-pack wearers trundle down the aisles and look for their row number, they shift side to side and their back packs become lethal weapons that slap unsuspecting seated people in the head. One guy got really steamed at me for holding his back pack away from my head as he pivoted back and forth, trying to help his wife put luggage in the overhead behind me. I told him he had already hit me in the head twice and he wasn't going to do it again unless he wanted to use his fist. He got this "look" - and then apologized.

I really do understand the "unconsciousness" that folks develop when they are on a "mission" (get on the plane, find a seat, get the luggage stowed, etc.) Still, folks ARE responsible for their own actions and should be mindful of other people. The airlines are walking a tight rope. They want customers, so don't push the "limits" too hard. Yet, all that carry-on is problematic and needs to be dealt with. I haven't flown an "under-booked" flight for several years now. I've never seen a flight that had a single overhead space left over either. Folks just bring more and more carry-on now that the airlines charge for checked luggage. Flight crews are the "go betweens" between greedy airlines and "stingy" passengers. It's not getting better. YMMV

Oh, oh, I've been using a backpack for flights for years. I stuff it under the seat and use it to prop up my feet during the flight, so I don't get sore knees from dangling feet. I avoid rolling carryons when I can, and when I can't, I use a small one. I don't swing my backpack side to side to look at seat numbers. If you make contact with my backpack, you rear-ended me in the aisle. When we flew last year (twice), DH and I shared one checked suitcase and used backpacks.

All this is in a bit of jest. I get your peeve.

 

[Major Tom]

Absolutely agree with you 100%. Overuse of photographs!! I'm a birder, and visit a lot of birding websites. Gradually they've all succumbed to the dull monotony of web designers' advice to "draw people in" with a large photo, ideally featuring young people smiling and rejoicing and on the move while doing something vaguely like birdwatching.

The use of stock photos on many websites is a constant source of amusement to me. Investment sites/brokers and the like, often feature stock photos of attractive seniors looking happy and leading active lives. It all looks a bit generic. On the other hand, I don't suppose a picture of a decrepit-looking person in a wheelchair in a dimly-lit room, staring at a TV screen, would be that inspiring! Somewhere between the two extremes has to be a more realistic representation - or, as you say, a site that is lighter on the images, and higher on the efficiency and functionality quotient.

Having said that, last year, one of the women featured in one of the stock photos on Vanguard's main page did look really cute. On logging in, I always hoped that her photo would be the one to pop up

 

[Koolau]

Oh, oh, I've been using a backpack for flights for years. I stuff it under the seat and use it to prop up my feet during the flight, so I don't get sore knees from dangling feet. I avoid rolling carryons when I can, and when I can't, I use a small one. I don't swing my backpack side to side to look at seat numbers. If you make contact with my backpack, you rear-ended me in the aisle. When we flew last year (twice), DH and I shared one checked suitcase and used backpacks.

All this is in a bit of jest. I get your peeve.

Ahhhh! So YOU were the one considerate back-pack-fellow-passenger I met! Thank you. It was very refreshing. Blessings on you.

 

[MichealKnight]

Financial Media

"Headwinds". "Tailwinds". "Attractive"

C;mon even a middle school teacher would've told us not to keep using the same words over and over again.


Also, commercials that keep using the same word to start a sentence over and over again.

 

[Souschef]

Proselytizers. Seems past month several thought I needed to be saved. Each time my not interested comment would be ignored so had to switch to the more firm F.... off!

Reminds me of a funny thing. I was doing some reloading in the garage, and my older son was helping put the cases in the loading blocks.
A couple of these folks came by, and commenting how nice it was to see my son helping. I said yes, we are reloading some 45 caliber ammunition.
That was the last I saw of them

 

[jollystomper]

2) Folks who use back packs have no sense of personal space. Air craft are crowded places and aisles are narrow. As back-pack wearers trundle down the aisles and look for their row number, they shift side to side and their back packs become lethal weapons that slap unsuspecting seated people in the head.

I have used backpacks, but I always take them off my back on the jet bridge before entering the plane, and carry it front of me going down the aisle. To me, in that way one can much more quickly lift it into an overhead and take ones seat, if one wants to make the process efficient.

Of course, I never load my backpack and/or carry-on so heavily that I cannot pick them up off of the ground and hold them in my hand once on a plane, and them lift them up into the overhead head. It is always "interesting" when someone has so much in their backpack/carry-on that they need help lifting it up and in. Not really complaining, as I get nice compliments from women who think this old weak guy is strong and such a gentlemen when he can help them store or remove their items. It makes me feel young .

 

[MarieIG]

- Lying politicians;

- Political commercials,

- Political polls;

- So-called news reporters giving their opinions of the news - no thanks, I just want the news, I can form my own opinion;

- Spam telephone calls.

 

[youbet]

Well my PP related to CCRC’s is how they don’t give you any sense of their cost structure. Just come in for a tour. If that’s not high pressure sales, I don’t know what is. Problem is, I thought they all had waiting lists. Why the need for the high pressure sales technique?

Jerry, I started to type a long winded explanation of CCRC (and similar facility's) costs for you. But there are more variables than first meet the eye and I figured I'd be typing for a week. For example, a person might be in independent living, assisted living, memory care, full nursing care, etc. And in the case of a couple, neither, one or both may be in any of those at any given time. You can get the information. The place we're dealing with hides nothing. But after a 1.5 hour meeting two weeks ago, I walked out with pages of notes and have already called for clarifications on several points. I don't think they (at least the ones I've dealt with) are fighting giving you a sense of their cost structure. The problem is that it's complicated, many of the sales staff are only comfortable dealing in financial generalities and most of their prospective customers don't want to or aren't able to crunch the numbers beyond general ranges anyway.

Our discussions here on this forum sometimes contain some misinformation and that doesn't help. For example, at many/most Type A contract CCRC's these days, the monthly fee for residency in the full nursing center is NOT the same as the monthly fee for residency in an independent living apartment.

Our favorite place has a significant waiting list. Oh, they have a number of one bedroom and studio apartments available. But we want 2 BR's, 2 full baths, 1.2k sq ft or so, balcony, indoor parking, upper floor with a view, etc. So, waiting list for us.

PM me if you want to share more of what we've learned and maybe some actual numbers. Maybe we could reopen the CCRC thread.


Edit: The Disclosure Statement is 5/8" thick, double sided. Oh boy........