Wedding Rings / Bands...Do you wear yours?

[fasteddie911]

I'm a practical person and want to ask a question: you're not the only person here who's said that they pretty much took their wedding band off after the ceremony and never wore it again. Why do you spend the money on one in the first place- just for the gesture at the ceremony? It seems like an expensive gesture unless the ring is sterling silver or just gold-plated.

It's a $30 titanium ring. I did give it a shot for a year, but just not for me.

 

[albireo13]

I wear mine all the time but, it is sometime a problem. I work on electronics, often in the lab, and the ring is a risk for shorting out equipment. I am very careful.
I fear that if I take it off I will. lose it so, I leave it on.


DW wears hers all the time.

 

[JustCurious]

She who must be obeyed: Yes

If a wife referred to her husband as "He who must be obeyed," would that be equally acceptable? Just curious.

Happy wife, happy life.

It seems that the concept of a wife obeying her husband is no longer politically correct, while the concept of a husband openly stating that he obeys his wife or the use of the common phrase "happy wife, happy life" is perfectly fine. It's an interesting world.

Yes, I know, they are jokes, I get it, but then why are there no jokes about a wife obeying her husband or why do you never hear anyone say "happy husband, happy life"?

 

[Nemo2]

Yes, I know, they are jokes, I get it

The term originated with the novel She, written over 130 years ago:

She by H Rider Haggard: Book Review

 

[travelover]

............It seems that the concept of a wife obeying her husband is no longer politically correct, while the concept of a husband openly stating that he obeys his wife or the use of the common phrase "happy wife, happy life" is perfectly fine. It's an interesting world.

Yes, I know, they are jokes, I get it, but then why are there no jokes about a wife obeying her husband or why do you never hear anyone say "happy husband, happy life"?

As you quoted me, I'll give you my opinion. I think that the advice "Happy wife, happy life" is advice for men, not the population in general. My observation is that men who try to dominate and keep their wives / SOs down end up in a miserable relationship.

 

[timo2]

My knuckle swells up and the ring often doesn't fit. Same thing with DW. We need to get them resized, but don't actually care that much to make it a priority.

Although, now that I'm older, without the ring, I've been drawing more interest from older women (I guess there are not that many older available men) so I might get the ring resized sooner than later.

 

[Dreamer]

My DH and I both wear plain gold wedding bands almost all of the time.

 

[Walt34]

I wear mine all the time but, it is sometime a problem. I work on electronics, often in the lab, and the ring is a risk for shorting out equipment. I am very careful.

On the very few occasions when I worked on "hot" equipment I wrapped a bit of electrical tape around the ring finger, covering the ring, for that reason. Would that work for you?

 

[rodi]

DH has a plain platinum band. He wears it 24/7 except when using equipment that has a lot of vibration... Like yesterday when he was using the concrete saw, and a few weeks ago when he was using the electric hedge clippers. He always puts it back on when he is done with the work.

I have a plain, thinner, platinum band as my wedding ring and a fairly plain platinum/sapphire ring as the engagement ring. The sapphire is set with a bezel setting that protects the stone much more than the typical prongs... 18+ years of wearing it 24/7 and the stone is still in solid. I don't remove it for dishes, showers, sleep, etc... We chose platinum settings, in part, for the durability compared to gold... Given my klutziness... it's been a good choice.

 

[kimcdougc]

DH wears his all the time. The original plain gold band. I wear mine when I leave the house. I have one I got on our 10th anniversary I wear and change out with another one we got after I had my open heart surgery.

 

[flintnational]

I wear mine. And it's my fifth wedding ring but I have only been married once. Yes, I have lost four. Each time we spend less on the replacement. The current is stainless steel from Amazon, $14.

 

[travelover]

On the very few occasions when I worked on "hot" equipment I wrapped a bit of electrical tape around the ring finger, covering the ring, for that reason. Would that work for you?

Don't you get funny looks in the bars?

 

[morriss003]

People are different, and this thread will probably show the diversity. Lots of chatter on weddings, and brides etc lately so I figured timing was appropriate.



So question is, do you wear your ring or not?



Some do, some don't. Some have a band, some have a set.
Some are gold, some are silver. Some are tattooed, some are bread-bag twisty ties.


Personally I feel naked, and a bit guilty when I don't and DW doesn't really like it if I don't. Then again there are times we don't. For instance I just broke my pinky and my ring swelled with it. I took that sucker off for breathing room. But now that swelling goes down, back on it goes.


DW is much more "expensive" but similar Value IMHO, but she takes hers off when doing dishes, baths etc. I take mine off when cranking wrenches playing ball etc.


Mine is a mixture of medals, hers is a bunch of tiny diamond surrounded by 3/4 carat. No extra engagement ring, just the wedding ring which we've been told is "different".


As for the co-eds, I realized quickly after I wed, doesn't matter if you wear one, people still flirt.

In my military days, I actually almost dated a married women until I noticed a tan line and started asking some tough questions.

Married 42 years and never had a band.

 

[zippy2020]

I really try to remember to wear mine now that we're retired - but I often do forget. I got out of the habit because I was an admin and (before everything thankfully went electronic) used to accidentally catch my ring on the cabinet handles all the time. One time I almost jerked my finger off when I was in a hurry and slammed the file drawer shut, LOL!

It's easy to forget even now because I don't wear it around the house. I love to cook and rings are just a nuisance when you're cooking, having to wash and dry your hands constantly, etc. So I only wear them when we go out...but half the time I STILL forget it!

 

[MikeD]

We Were so Poor that...

We got married right after my wife graduated from college as her parents would not pay for her to continue her education if she got married when we wanted to. They thought the only reason to get married was to have children. We suggested another reason, ie., being in love but we were rebuked with "That's not a reason." We are childfree to this day, about 45 or 46 years later. My parents said they would pay for my education no matter what I did but failed to keep their word.

We thought my wife's parents were wrong but we are big believers in The Golden Rule so we waited until my wife finished her degree.

My bride was 21 (Graduated in three years with a BS in Education. She was motivated.) and I was 22. It turned out that I had to work full time and pay for school by using job benefits despite my parents giving their word. I got a BS in Comp Sci about 6 years later. My wife later got another BS, also in CS.

My MIL bought us our rings at a now-defunct discount dept. store called Best. My wife's cost $19.00 and mine was $23.00, engraving included. They are white gold and very slim and plain. My wife's engagement ring was the twisted-into-a-round-shape iron wire from a Baggies brand twist-tie. She loves it.

We couldn't have afforded them otherwise. Our honeymoon was three days on Chincoteague Island, Va, a six-hour drive away, where we had met at 16 and 17 while camping during summer vacation with our families. We got married on a Friday to save money. I had to be back at school for final exams on Monday. My wife's parents paid for everything except our honeymoon. We were then and continue to be, grateful for their generosity. We had a chocolate frosted yellow layer cake at the reception that cost about $25.00, IIRC. We had no alcohol or bar as it cost too much and my parents drank too much. My wife had two of her uncles who were Catholic Fathers perform the ceremony. They bitched to each other about the lack of alcohol. I used to have remarkably good hearing. Almost everyone who attended said it was a really nice event at which they had a good time and everyone agreed that it was the best wedding cake that they had ever had, even to this day, 42 years later. We think the comments were sincere.

We wear our rings all the time. I don't care whether we do or not but it's important to my wife's picture of what we should do, so I do. I did not wear mine for about 3 or 4 years when my finger swelled during my pre-transplant diabetes-induced kidney failure. I cut it off with pliers. After my transplant my wife got the ring repaired and resized and I continue to wear it. It does not affect my behavior. I will do what ever my wife wants me to do if it makes her happy.

We are now 64 and 63, have been happily married for 42 years, and I think the secret is to be tolerant, meet before your whole personality is formed so it still can be affected by the other person, and not think of one's spouse as a sex-object but as a person. We both think that you don't really bond until you have suffered together and overcome mutual setbacks and bad things and events together in life.

We have never been happier. I am, as always, happy. I was born with a happy attitude and only two things have ever really bothered me deeply: When my dog/daughter Emily Ann, passed away in 2009 and the fact that I am getting closer to my own death. We had no children and thus had a really strong bond with our dog. As for my own demise, I have a strong desire to live forever but realize that is probably not going to happen. I was literally weeks away from death in April, '96 but received a timely Kidney transplant from a very generous family whose daughter was killed.

I literally have lived an extra 22 years of extremely happy bonus life and I tell my wife all the time that if I were to die right now I would be content and have had happily, as my mother used to say, "Played the hand I was dealt."

Mike D

 

[RE2Boys]

My DH and I both wear plain gold wedding bands almost all of the time.

We do the same. I hate jewelry ( or any time of body bling outside my mustache) and so have a simple $40 gold band that I've worn for 24 years now. My wife has the same for wedding band, asked for a 5 diamond anniversary type ring as the engagement ring, she disliked big items on her fingers that can get caught on clothing etc. while active.

 

[aja8888]

We got married right after my wife graduated from college as her parents would not pay for her to continue her education if she got married when we wanted to. They thought the only reason to get married was to have children. We suggested another reason, ie., being in love but we were rebuked with "That's not a reason." We are childfree to this day, about 45 or 46 years later. My parents said they would pay for my education no matter what I did but failed to keep their word.

We thought my wife's parents were wrong but we are big believers in The Golden Rule so we waited until my wife finished her degree.

My bride was 21 (Graduated in three years with a BS in Education. She was motivated.) and I was 22. It turned out that I had to work full time and pay for school by using job benefits despite my parents giving their word. I got a BS in Comp Sci about 6 years later. My wife later got another BS, also in CS.

My MIL bought us our rings at a now-defunct discount dept. store called Best. My wife's cost $19.00 and mine was $23.00, engraving included. They are white gold and very slim and plain. My wife's engagement ring was the twisted-into-a-round-shape iron wire from a Baggies brand twist-tie. She loves it.

We couldn't have afforded them otherwise. Our honeymoon was three days on Chincoteague Island, Va, a six-hour drive away, where we had met at 16 and 17 while camping during summer vacation with our families. We got married on a Friday to save money. I had to be back at school for final exams on Monday. My wife's parents paid for everything except our honeymoon. We were then and continue to be, grateful for their generosity. We had a chocolate frosted yellow layer cake at the reception that cost about $25.00, IIRC. We had no alcohol or bar as it cost too much and my parents drank too much. My wife had two of her uncles who were Catholic Fathers perform the ceremony. They bitched to each other about the lack of alcohol. I used to have remarkably good hearing. Almost everyone who attended said it was a really nice event at which they had a good time and everyone agreed that it was the best wedding cake that they had ever had, even to this day, 42 years later. We think the comments were sincere.

We wear our rings all the time. I don't care whether we do or not but it's important to my wife's picture of what we should do, so I do. I did not wear mine for about 3 or 4 years when my finger swelled during my pre-transplant diabetes-induced kidney failure. I cut it off with pliers. After my transplant my wife got the ring repaired and resized and I continue to wear it. It does not affect my behavior. I will do what ever my wife wants me to do if it makes her happy.

We are now 64 and 63, have been happily married for 42 years, and I think the secret is to be tolerant, meet before your whole personality is formed so it still can be affected by the other person, and not think of one's spouse as a sex-object but as a person. We both think that you don't really bond until you have suffered together and overcome mutual setbacks and bad things and events together in life.

We have never been happier. I am, as always, happy. I was born with a happy attitude and only two things have ever really bothered me deeply: When my dog/daughter Emily Ann, passed away in 2009 and the fact that I am getting closer to my own death. We had no children and thus had a really strong bond with our dog. As for my own demise, I have a strong desire to live forever but realize that is probably not going to happen. I was literally weeks away from death in April, '96 but received a timely Kidney transplant from a very generous family whose daughter was killed.

I literally have lived an extra 22 years of extremely happy bonus life and I tell my wife all the time that if I were to die right now I would be content and have had happily, as my mother used to say, "Played the hand I was dealt."

Mike D

Nice story, Mike and sounds like you two were made for each other.

 

[MikeD]

Nice story, Mike and sounds like you two were made for each other.

We are well-suited for each other, I think mostly, because we influenced each other while we were growing up.

I found the Happy Marriage thread a while after posting this. It really should go there.

Mike D.

 

[6miths]

DW wears hers. I don't wear mine unless it is a special occasion. W#rk was such that I would likely have lost it and would have had to take it off frequently. I don't wear any jewelry or watch. Both are simple gold bands. DW doesn't have an official engagement ring.

 

[kgtest]

I still get lost on this forum. I knew I posted this but hadnt been able to find it. All of a sudde. Five pages of replies.

An interesting note...we gor married in Wailea West Maui. The Reverand 'Al' dropped the ring and at first I was thinking holy cow he just dropped the third most expensive thing ive ever spent money on.

Then as I took a seriously deep breathe the symbolic irony of what was to come set in. The Union although strong, can be fragile or awkward like a ring at first....but once firmly planted and the longer put the stronger the bond becomes. Also...it landed in the grass a d I for some reasone kept expectong this loud noise of a diomond dropping. Nope it was totally quiet but it landed in the green grass which felt right over a stufft church pew.

I also figured ahh he11 mt luck rev already dropped the ring before she coukd say I do...after brude and FIL doing a fake dash off the runway as the bells rang...oh and after ole mans rental car ran out of gas. I knee pops would be late hes late to everything to the point we lie to hin and say an earlier time...i didnt expext the bride and father in law to make a last second dash away from the wedding nor the rev droppibg the ring but I figured things could only get better.

Thanks for sharing folks.

 

[kgtest]

I have 3 on a platinum chain around my neck.

One was DH's original- a plain platinum which he wore 24/7 until he started losing weight due to health issues. Had it re-sized once and then he lost more weight. It disappeared when we were staying in a hotel between house closings in 2015. At his suggestion, we bought a replacement, in sterling silver, in Iceland.

DH died in late 2016. In early 2017 I was cleaning out a cupboard and found one of the small plastic bags DH usually tucked into his luggage- this one had a few Tums, a few Hydrocodone, TWO nail clippers... and his original wedding band. I was so happy I cried.

So- I have those rings plus the third, which was my wedding band- a thin platinum one which I never took off. It was a great idea- didn't look like it was worth stealing, didn't interfere with activities. After some soul-searching I took it off almost a year ago, on what would have been DH's 79th birthday.

My engagement ring had an imperial topaz in the center. Not only did it save us the "how-big-is-your-diamond" competition and cost a lot less, but I can now wear it as a regular ring, without it being an obviously-recycled engagement ring.

I should also mention: the wedding band from my first marriage was an eternity band of diamonds. I had the "eternity band" cut in half (loved that symbolism!) and had them made into half-hoop earrings.

Great story. I still sorr of miss my USAF ring my folks gabe me after I graduated basic training. I think an ex snagged my class ring. One had a green gem and the airforce one had a blue. I think those two combined cost more than ym wedding ring.

 

[kgtest]

We both wear them, have been for 51 years

 

[HFWR]

Pawned...

 

[yakers]

Always wear mine, 2 years ago when I was going through chemo & radiation for throat cancer she redsigned our wedding rings and we pretty much wear them all the time.

 

[MBAustin]

Beautiful rings, yakers. Both unique and tasteful. I hope you both smile when you look at them.