Poll on depression

[mickj]

just curious

 

[lazygood4nothinbum]

i consider myself the happiest saddest person i know. a old colleague of mine (who since won a pulitzer-go bud!) once described me as having my head in a rainbow colored cloud.

generally i'm very happy and apparently i've always been. at my 30-year high school reunion more than one person commented on how they remembered me always laughing and making people laugh. my little cousins and niece/nephews comment that i laugh a lot. my partner was similar. together people found us quite annoying after an hour or so. they used to accuse us of laughing inappropriately. hey, we can't help it if we find you funny.

since having buried my partner and later my best friend and then even my dog, and now that i have been watching mom die for the last 12 years i find i have to battle for my happiness.

it is a worthy fight. here i find myself without a partner, without children and soon i will no longer be caregiver for mom. i'm financially independent & i'll have no responsibility other than to my own happiness. it is a responsibility that i do not take lightly, but that doesn't mean i won't make fun of it. nya nya.

"life is too important to take seriously." ~~oscar wilde

"if suffering can be corrected, then there's no need to be despondent. and if it cannot be remedied, there is no benefit even if one becomes unhappy." ~~shantideva

"life is a play and we all play a part:
the lover, the dreamer, the clown..."
~~young & lewis in laugh, clown, laugh

"being miserable won't make you any happier." ~~me

 

[Nords]

I've read "The Noonday Demon" and I don't use the word "depression" in my personal vocabulary any more... "bummer" is about as deep as I've ever gone.

 

[Martha]

I can get sad or "bummed" as Nords said, but not depressed.

But I can slip into anxiety pretty easily; especially when I was working super hard.

 

[HFWR]

Coincidence? I think not...

 

[Rich_by_the_Bay]

I'd guess it would be hard to achieve FIRE if you suffered from serious, recurrent depression unless you had outside or spousal wealth.

 

[kat]

I think it runs in families. In my family, the people who deal with depression also tend to be high wage earners who love their jobs. Money, fortunately, hasn't been an issue.

 

[tedster]

I'd guess it would be hard to achieve FIRE if you suffered from serious, recurrent depression unless you had outside or spousal wealth.

you might be surprised.
depression runs in both sides of my family, took me a long time to realize that's what was going on with me and to finally get some help.
it comes & goes, some years sunny, some years cloudy.
anyhow, seems like most of my relatives turn to the bottle when things get 'cloudy'.
I turned to work instead. in college, had a couple of down years and got close to 4.0 averages those semesters. later on, a few more down years led to a workaholic phase, rose up the ladder and got about $800K from stock options before bailing out for a more balanced life. not quite FI, but depression and FI dont seem incompatible to me, just depends on how one copes with it.

 

[lazygood4nothinbum]

depression and FI dont seem incompatible to me, just depends on how one copes with it.

you make it sound like a good thing.

interesting how it is less what we experience and more how we experience what we experience which really matters.

"outward circumstances are no substitute for inner experience."--c.g. jung

 

[tedster]

you make it sound like a good thing.

oh no, nothing of the sort intended.
hiding in a book or at the office, to keep oneself distracted from major depression, is not a good way to go through life.
but it pays better than, say, self-medicating with booze.
it should go without saying that neither is a good alternative to bona fide medical treatment.

interesting how it is less what we experience and more how we experience what we experience which really matters.

well said!

 

[Sheryl]

I have been clinically depressed a couple times.  It's waaaaay different than being bummed out.     

Those who have been there describe it as "falling into the black hole." You can see it coming, but you sometimes have no control over falling in.   As Ted said, it's not that hard to work with depression; it's a lot harder to have a life.

The thing I find morbidly fascinating is how depression can reach up and grab you when your life seems to be going fine and there is no particular outward cause.     

On the other hand, I've lost my mother, my health and my dog in less than two years, and I'm still generally pretty happy.   Bummed out, yes, but not depressed, thankfully.

Noonday Demon does a very good job of describing how bad it can get -  and it makes me thankful I never got past watching gameshows in my pajamas for six weeks.