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Old 03-28-2024, 08:02 AM   #41
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Good reminder, I really need to get my affairs in order. At min a list of assets and liabilities and some account details.

I have an out-dated will but we've had a child since then that is almost 4. Which means my slack-o-meter is at about four years long here eeek.
You should leave a current list of your logins and passwords with your will. Also the passcode/password for your phone if you have enabled two factor.
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Old 03-28-2024, 08:12 AM   #42
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A good and very worthwhile read. Makes me think. But it makes me appreciate the planning our parents did to make funerals and settling estates easier for my sister and I, as well as DW. I have emulated what my parents did to make things easier for those who follow us, but there are some loose ends I need to attend to. Thanks.
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Old 03-28-2024, 08:37 AM   #43
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I just finished my "End of Life " notebook for my daughter to use when I sign off for good. It's an inch thick with documents she will need, and lists of important stuff. I have also included a flash drive with an encrypted file of passwords, etc. It's amazing what you didn't think of when starting to put together one of these.

My DW didn't have one specifically for her, and when she [passed, I spent a good bit of time tracking stuff down. Plus, she had passwords for accounts (Apple and others) that I needed to close out accounts which became a PIA to get done without them.
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Old 03-28-2024, 11:46 AM   #44
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No problems either with my parents. Money was placed in an account within a financial institution. I was able to check on the funds that they paid for the burial funeral account. It did gain interest over the years. Went smooth for both of them.
In my state, the funeral side of expenses is put in a trust account at a local bank. I get a statement every year. These expenses are locked in at what we initially signed up for. There were a few very minor expenses (flowers, etc) that could go up, but the big things are set. This amount can be refunded to us just by requesting.

The actual burial part is prepaid (plot, marker, grave liner, etc). This cannot be refunded. It can be sold, but I've read it's a hassle and you most likely won't get back what you paid in. So, you need to be fairly certain where you will end up living. We aren't going anywhere, so probably 99% safe.
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Old 03-28-2024, 12:02 PM   #45
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The small personal property can be a head ache. DB asked for all of it, I gave it to him and told him to give me back what he thought I should have. I found out he took it all to a pawn shop and sold it for a few hundred bucks.

I believe all states have small estate procedures when people do not have a formal probate after death. I have seen for a few states and you complete the form and return with a check asking them to cut new check(s) to the rightful beneficiary(ies). Very simple. I always say I know my parents and they wouldn't want me to ignore a few hundred dollars!
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Old 03-28-2024, 05:34 PM   #46
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I just finished my "End of Life " notebook for my daughter to use when I sign off for good. It's an inch thick with documents she will need, and lists of important stuff. I have also included a flash drive with an encrypted file of passwords, etc. It's amazing what you didn't think of when starting to put together one of these.

My DW didn't have one specifically for her, and when she [passed, I spent a good bit of time tracking stuff down. Plus, she had passwords for accounts (Apple and others) that I needed to close out accounts which became a PIA to get done without them.
What did you use for your EOL notebook? Self created or something you purchased? If purchased, did you find it to your liking? Thanks.
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Old 03-28-2024, 07:39 PM   #47
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I use a 3 ring binder and a hole puncher. That way I can include the latest copy of each brokerage report and can insert and can swap pages as things change.
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Old 03-30-2024, 11:21 AM   #48
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After Mom had a mini stoke in the fall and we were trying to hire home health care, I needed her auto insurance. She couldn't remember the name of the company which led to a 2 hour search through her "very organized" 8 drawer file cabinets. We learned alphabetical doesn't work. I found the NOK Box (next of kin) which is organized by category (home, auto, insurance, investments, end of life ceremonies etc.). It's been very easy to use and I'll be getting one to set our affairs in order in the future.
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Old 03-30-2024, 11:55 AM   #49
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What did you use for your EOL notebook? Self created or something you purchased? If purchased, did you find it to your liking? Thanks.
Self created. Pretty easy once you think it through. Like Joe, I use a three ring binder and can update pages as things change.
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Old 03-30-2024, 02:31 PM   #50
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I use a 1-1/2" D-ring binder with Avery 1-31 Tab Dividers for 3 Ring Binders, Customizable Table of Contents, Multicolor Tabs.

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Old 04-01-2024, 02:35 PM   #51
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If anyone is still reading how hard is it to arrange burial/cremation if there is no funeral? I talked to "relative" about doing this after I read the article and they were quite offended and upset that I mentioned it so not sure if I should try to do it "secretly" in advance or how much trouble it actually is. We don't live in the same part of the country so estate settlement will be inconvenient at best. They have done all they are willing to do to make it "easy" for me. It was a strange conversation tbh esp as said relative has been telling me death was imminent for about 30 years. . . .
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Old 04-01-2024, 02:44 PM   #52
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If anyone is still reading how hard is it to arrange burial/cremation if there is no funeral? I talked to "relative" about doing this after I read the article and they were quite offended and upset that I mentioned it so not sure if I should try to do it "secretly" in advance or how much trouble it actually is. We don't live in the same part of the country so estate settlement will be inconvenient at best. They have done all they are willing to do to make it "easy" for me.
The Federal Trade Commission's "Funeral Rule" states that funeral homes have to provide you with an itemized price list and allow you to pick and choose whatever you want. They cannot require you to purchase any of the line items other than one service fee.

This might be helpful: https://www.nationalcremation.com/cr...a-funeral-home
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Old 04-01-2024, 03:31 PM   #53
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The Federal Trade Commission's "Funeral Rule" states that funeral homes have to provide you with an itemized price list and allow you to pick and choose whatever you want. They cannot require you to purchase any of the line items other than one service fee.

This might be helpful: https://www.nationalcremation.com/cr...a-funeral-home
Thanks!! I've not really ever thought about this before since I knew I'd not have a service. (No family to attend). Looks like the state where I expect the death to require a funeral director.
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Old 04-01-2024, 03:46 PM   #54
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I thought about it for a minute or two at the time, but there could be legal ramifications for doing that...even though I was personal representative/executor. In the end, just decided the amount was not enough to pursue anything or take any chances. And again, it was small refunds for prepaid stuff - wasn't any money that we were expecting.

Endorse it with your name followed by "Affiant", since you are named as the executor. That is what I did with similar items from my dad's estate. Unless the estate is contentious there will no problems.
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Old 04-01-2024, 03:54 PM   #55
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I'm going to start writing an EOL Notebook.

Page one in very large print is going to say to obtain copies of my death certificate (originals and copies, depending on what is required) before starting any estate matters.

I haven't figured out how to do business continuity but page one will also make sure my cellphone is kept active as that is used by 2-factor authentication and to keep my auto pay accounts for my domain (E-Mail account) active or E-Mail access will die for my E-Mail (I have nothing to hide in E-Mail).
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Old 04-11-2024, 08:32 AM   #56
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A question about funeral pre-planning...


I thought I saw posts on er-org in the past 6 months that people had used some national company for more of a pre-planned or turn-key funeral. In fact, I thought it was this thread, but I didn't find reference to it. I thought I remembered reading one person say they used this company and another person say they did too.


Does anyone know about that company? I contacted funeral consumer's alliance (I posted a link to this all-volunteer organization above), but in my geography, there's only one place that gives members a discount, so the only value was that they pointed you to the one place. So I wanted to investigate pre-payment options with a national company vs pre-paying a local outfit, but can't find reference to it any more.
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Old 04-11-2024, 08:36 AM   #57
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I thought I saw posts on er-org in the past 6 months that people had used some national company for more of a pre-planned or turn-key funeral. In fact, I thought it was this thread, but I didn't find reference to it. I thought I remembered reading one person say they used this company and another person say they did too.
Possibly the Neptune Society?
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Old 04-11-2024, 02:28 PM   #58
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Possibly the Neptune Society?
That was it. I saw another discussion thread, which was happening concurrent with this thread: https://www.early-retirement.org/for...ml#post3068328
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Old 04-11-2024, 04:14 PM   #59
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DW's grandmother bought a pre planned funeral back in the 80's and she passed in '99. The funeral was entirely paid for, but we got a 1099 for the amount of the funeral, which, in essence, was an annuity, and since we didn't buy it, it was considered income to us.
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Old 04-11-2024, 06:55 PM   #60
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That was it. I saw another discussion thread, which was happening concurrent with this thread: https://www.early-retirement.org/for...ml#post3068328
Been in touch with Neptune. Their prices are a bit tricky. We're pretty callous about corpse care after death, I'm good with a hole in the dirt and feed the planet back, but probably a container of ashes is easier for those who remain. Guess you need body pickup, permit to cremate, cremation, container for ashes - and I think you can provide your own coffee can. Then there are add-ons. Bottom of the price list it's about $1500? Upper goes past $10-15K (been a few days). It goes up fast for viewings, special cardboard boxes, transport from wherever you croak it to where you want the ashes sent. Somber speakers, DJ, interpretive dance troupe, action photographer...

Some of those things may be bogus because death makes me uncomfortable too - I'm also contacting local crematoriums just to get a comparison. Would like to pre-pay and have a single phone number for whoever is left behind trying to take care of business.
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