DoingHomework
Recycles dryer sheets
- Joined
- May 28, 2010
- Messages
- 254
Perhaps with a gravity assist. Or a catapult.
Brewer's point (he beat me to it) is that if you talk to the best lawyers in your area about your divorce case, then hypothetically they're supposed to recuse themselves from his business if he tries to hire them. Of course now you can confirm that with "your" lawyer.
He's had more time to plan this than you have, and you have no idea what surprises he's been able to set up. If you haven't already then you should change the passwords on all your financial accounts, your computer, your e-mail addresses, landline voicemail, and your cell phone. Think about changing your work account passwords too. I guess that also applies to social-media accounts like Facebook & Twitter. If he has your logins then it doesn't matter who "owns" your accounts.
You could immediately freeze (or even cancel) the credit cards that you share with him. You could apply for credit in your own name or work from cash for a while.
You might want to change the locks on your residence. It'll discourage him from attempting any appeals or "reunions".
You might even want to track down all your car keys and consider changing that lock as well.
If you two share any joint accounts then you should move at least half the money to accounts only owned by you.
You don't have to call his workplace. Your lawyer would be well within their rights to contact the supervisors of both your spouse and his girlfriend to ask for depositions on their behavior and performance.
In the more distant future, you're going to want to review all your financial plans to remove him from powers of attorney, insurance policies, IRA/401(k) beneficiary designations, medical directives... that's probably only a partial list.
I think the good news is that he revealed his colors so "early" in life. You're right-- you're glad that there are no kids, multi-decade histories, or other ties to him.
Excellent post. I helped a woman leave her husband once for complicated reasons (that had nothing to do with any involvement with me!). She spent almost 2 years preparing and he was clueless the entire time. She did most of the things you mentioned and those she did not do she had prepared for (changing locks, moving money). She even had stashed things with a lawyer so that actions could be set in motion on literally a moment's notice when and if she decided to kick him out.
When the time came she made two phone calls, one to me and my wife and the other to her lawyer. Things happened very quickly after that and were basically complete in just a few days. I think his head was spinning.
The point is, if he planned this at all there could be a lot more going on than you know about and it is important to get a pro involved who will work on your behalf objectively.
And just a note, I agree 100% with changing the locks. But in the situation I dealt with the locks were changed right away but the husband returned and broke in a couple of times to get "his" stuff. Reporting this to the police did very little good until there was a restraining order (routine where we are) because until then the police considered him to have equal right to the property. They even suggested that he could have her arrested for locking him out or holding his things.
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