No kids. Who do we put in the will?

[OldShooter]

Yeah, those commercials do work. Shriners and St Jude will get some money. I see a lot of expensive commercials so I will have to check the details first. Probably some T2T and Wounded Warrior type places as well.

https://www.guidestar.org/ is a great source for info on any nonprofit except the very smallest. You can download tax returns and see who is getting paid and how much, how much is spent on fundraising, etc. I have seen some where all the highest paid executives just happen to have the same last name. (!)

To download returns you have to register as a Guidestar user. I'm sure I've been registered at least five years and have seen no negatives from this. No spam, no solicitations for contributions, etc.

I would very much like to do a scholarship. Any advice on where to look for info on this?

One of the biggest things our community foundation does is to administer scholarships, so you might start there. There is a variety, including for specific schools, local area schools, trade schools, etc. I think most are limited to kids from the local area.

If you have a specific school in mind, you can also call and ask to talk to the Development Director. aka chief fund-raiser. That will definitely get you on a mailing list, though.

 

[m3bs]

I’m struggling with the same issue. I believe that as Boomers, we have spoiled the next generation already, and I am reluctant to enrich the lazy ones. We have some nieces and nephews who fall into that category, and others who have grown into responsible working adults. I’m not averse to leaving them some, but not enough that they could quit working too early. I like the idea of supporting the trade schools, in fact, I’m considering making the Mike Rowe foundation a significant beneficiary. Both of our alma maters have been harassing us for 50+ years, but we aren’t happy with the amount of money they are pouring into non-academic areas and luxury accommodations, etc. The cost of college education has increased way more than the CoL, and without a corresponding improvement in the quality of education. Don’t get me started on the liberal bias of many programs….

So, with that said, I’m trying to change 60+ years of fiscally conservative experience and try to BTD before we go…

 

[Stormy Kromer]

We have two children who will inherit 50-50 with a per stirpes provision now that they are of child raising age.

In the rare event they all predecease us we have a contingency provision. 1/3 each to a couple of orphanages and 1/3 to the salvation army.

We also put a provision in our will to specifically disclaim some relatives in case they contest it. Like most families we have a crazy one or two.

 

[braumeister]

https://www.guidestar.org/ is a great source for info on any nonprofit except the very smallest.

https://www.charitywatch.org and https://www.charitynavigator.org are also very useful.

 

[nobody]

It all goes to my alma mater for scholarships under my name. I worked with them and setup the requirements for them to fund.

 

[braumeister]

DW is also interested in setting up a scholarship or two at her alma mater, and their alumni office was only too happy to assist with all the details.

 

[Lewis Clark]

Side story: We had a single mother friend with a 14 year old son. I gave the son a "rare coin" (wasn't really worth much) and watched his reaction. He never said thank you and didn't seem appreciative. I had 50 silver dollars in the next room (worth about $1250) that were going to be his 30 seconds later but he didn't pass my test. I'm not sure if that makes me a cold hearted bastard or not.

This does not make you a cold hearted bastard in my book.

If someone could not even say "thank you" to a gift, why consider giving them anything else? Fourteen is old enough to know how to say "thank you" in my opinion.

 

[COcheesehead]

I would very much like to do a scholarship. Any advice on where to look for info on this?

I worked with the Advancement department at my old college. 100% of my donation goes to the student. The school requires the recipient write us a letter each year telling us about them and how the funds have helped them. It’s pretty heartwarming.

 

[Brat]

Consider making small gifts to selected potential beneficiaries while you are still alive. Do they thank you? Do they put the money to what you deem good use? I've done this and it's an eye opening experience. If you prefer to avoid being subsequently hounded by large charities, you might wish to skip donating to ones that are mass mailers and advertisers.

You could open 529 accounts to the children you are considering as beneficiaries. If they turn out to be not suitable for college you can move it to another student or redeam the account with a modest penality on the gain. Don't contribute to the parent's 529 for the kids, you want to control the account.

 

[JoeWras]

https://www.guidestar.org/ is a great source for info on any nonprofit except the very smallest. You can download tax returns and see who is getting paid and how much, how much is spent on fundraising, etc. I have seen some where all the highest paid executives just happen to have the same last name. (!)

To download returns you have to register as a Guidestar user. I'm sure I've been registered at least five years and have seen no negatives from this. No spam, no solicitations for contributions, etc.

The DAF we use, Vanguard Charitable, gives you access to Guidestar. It is very helpful. I especially find the tax filings informative. No fluff, just the facts. For really small organizations, they frequently still have the tax filing so you at least get that info.

I was considering St. Jude, but I saw a few things on Guidestar that bothered me a bit and we took them off the list. Nothing really major, mostly too much spent on advertising and some really, really highly paid employees (they may be surgeons, can't remember).

 

[Drake3287]

Just remember, 20 years from now those two neighbor kids across the street might not be the cute little kids that they are right now. Just remember that wills should be be updated as needed down the road. Same goes for those nieces and nephews years from now. Unforeseen money can be a curse for some people.

I'm the Trustee for my deceased parents estate and I'm constantly dealing with the headache of a troubled sibling. Luckily in my case my parents foresaw the issues and wrote it into their Living Trust for me to deal with.

 

[dmpi]

We're in the same kind of situation. Since we also have no kids were going to have to round up a trusted someone who can take care of us in our elder years. If that person does a good job then I think it would be appropriate to leave something in the will for him or her.

 

[O2Bfree]

No kids here either. Currently, I've got half going to St. Jude's, Shriner's, a local cancer research center, and a couple small local organizations. The other half goes to my only niece.

We're in the same kind of situation. Since we also have no kids were going to have to round up a trusted someone who can take care of us in our elder years. If that person does a good job then I think it would be appropriate to leave something in the will for him or her.

This is a possibility too. If we need a caregiver and find a really good one who stays with us for awhile, I'd want to pay them well and also leave them a nice sum.

 

[DrRoy]

We have two adult sons, but they have no children and little chance of them. They will get most, but we are looking for the right recipient for a portion to create some legacy.

 

[LateToFIRE]

Similar boat, what we're doing is leaving half to family (siblings, nieces, nephews, extremely close friends), and half to a handful of charities. We update every 3-4 years. The way its designed is that individual bequests will be significant but not exactly life-altering, and charitable bequests will be ~$1M each, which would be quite significant to the institutions we've chosen.

 

[Amethyst]

While I agree that a polite person of any age higher than 7 will typically thank you for a gift, I would not have placed so much weight on a 14-year-old's reaction.

Lack of a thank-you was an etiquette error. Lack of enthusiasm, though, could mean he honestly wasn't sure what to make of the gift. Did you try educating him about it?

We have discussed this and will probably try it.

Side story: We had a single mother friend with a 14 year old son. I gave the son a "rare coin" (wasn't really worth much) and watched his reaction. He never said thank you and didn't seem appreciative. I had 50 silver dollars in the next room (worth about $1250) that were going to be his 30 seconds later but he didn't pass my test. I'm not sure if that makes me a cold hearted bastard or not. We haven't seen him for a long time but I have heard he ended up being a decent guy.

 

[Tetto]

While I agree that a polite person of any age higher than 7 will typically thank you for a gift, I would not have placed so much weight on a 14-year-old's reaction.

Lack of a thank-you was an etiquette error. Lack of enthusiasm, though, could mean he honestly wasn't sure what to make of the gift. Did you try educating him about it?

When I was growing up, my parents drilled into us "please and thank you". I think a 14 year old is sufficiently old enough and should have shown a bit of gratitude and definitely said thank you. It unfortunately speaks to his upbringing.

 

[badatmath]

I did the opposite to the goal of the OP - 5 charities at 20% each.

My actual reason was that if someone squandered/embezzled the money they could not have all of it so maybe some would do some good in the end. Might have been a dumb reason I guess but it was all I could think of at the time.

 

[Time2]

I'm willing to be #10

What? Waiting, they're taking applications?

 

[Jeffman52]

Are there things you are passionate about that you would like to make an impact on? I saw that you mentioned scholarships which is a great way to give back. Is there a group that you would like the scholarship to target?



The only thing to really be careful of (IMHO) is ensuring that whatever you leave significant money to, is going to use most of the money in the cause it supports rather than "administrative costs".

 

[Midpack]

I want to give money (annually?) to my favorite nieces and nephews while they are young enough to benefit from the extra money. By the time we pass (if natural causes), they should all be FI or close to it. Seems pointless to me to give them money then, though I'm sure they'd still appreciate it.

But DW is adamant against it. When I ask why she's never given a reason, just "we're not giving them money." It's not that she doesn't care about the nieces/nephews as they are all from her brothers and sister. Any advice on how to sway her?

 

[pacergal]

I want to give money (annually?) to my favorite nieces and nephews while they are young enough to benefit from the extra money. By the time we pass (if natural causes), they should all be FI or close to it. Seems pointless to me to give them money then, though I'm sure they'd still appreciate it.

But DW is adamant against it. When I ask why she's never given a reason, just "we're not giving them money." It's not that she doesn't care about the nieces/nephews as they are all from her brothers and sister. Any advice on how to sway her?

Have you specifically asked her why? Drill that down a bit and see what she says. You could also share your reasons why you want to give some now, if you have not already.
Or try a higher token amount on birthdays, maybe $1000, and see the response.

 

[Midpack]

Have you specifically asked her why? Drill that down a bit and see what she says. You could also share your reasons why you want to give some now, if you have not already.
Or try a higher token amount on birthdays, maybe $1000, and see the response.

I have asked her many times, she just says "NO." Won't give a reason...

 

[MarieIG]

I want to give money (annually?) to my favorite nieces and nephews while they are young enough to benefit from the extra money. By the time we pass (if natural causes), they should all be FI or close to it. Seems pointless to me to give them money then, though I'm sure they'd still appreciate it.

But DW is adamant against it. When I ask why she's never given a reason, just "we're not giving them money." It's not that she doesn't care about the nieces/nephews as they are all from her brothers and sister. Any advice on how to sway her?

No, I would respect her wishes - but does she like to give them gifts now and then as opposed to money?

For example, if the nieces and nephews or young enough have their own kiddos pay for horseback riding lessons, tennis lessons, camp, art classes (something they would really enjoy).

 

[dmpi]

I want to give money (annually?) to my favorite nieces and nephews while they are young enough to benefit from the extra money. By the time we pass (if natural causes), they should all be FI or close to it. Seems pointless to me to give them money then, though I'm sure they'd still appreciate it.

But DW is adamant against it. When I ask why she's never given a reason, just "we're not giving them money." It's not that she doesn't care about the nieces/nephews as they are all from her brothers and sister. Any advice on how to sway her?

When you give a large gift you also give an obligation for the receiver to give you something back. Also avoid the situation where someone gets something and others do not. Different families have different family dynamics. I would respect your wife's wishes.