Do You Like Living Alone?

[Retire2013]

I love living alone. I can push the coffee table completely out of the way to turn the entire living room into one big open space to play video game tennis, boxing, bowling, etc. I can have a podcast playing in the background while I fold my laundry, do the dishes, etc. I can binge watch anything on Netflix. I can cook elaborate meals, bake fancy decadent cakes, or do take-outs. Whatever I want, whenever I want. It's really awesome. I live with a very sweet and playful dog though. We play ball together. We take walks together. That's pretty much all the company I need.

 

[EastWest Gal]

I've never really lived alone. There was one month when I moved for work before DH and DS could join me. Unfortunately, I had virtually no furniture, no television set, and, for that month, no computer or internet. And I really liked it.

But would I want to live alone full time? No. We're easygoing with one another, so there is little pressure to conform to one another. DH and I both like podcasts and audio stuff, and the house is big enough that we often spend the day in our own worlds, which is nice.

 

[socca]

... I am really looking forward to living alone again. My mom also enjoyed it once my dad died. My single friends love it. So what do you like or dislike about living alone?

Any sensible woman living with me would be yearning to leave, so this really isn't a question that often crosses my mind.

A huge advantage to living alone: nothing needs to be negotiated regarding how my conduct my personal affairs. This includes what goes in the frig: the only temptations there are what I put there.

 

[Markola]

If I had lived alone, I would not have made to the age I am now. I tend to hurt myself. A lot. Once rolled a car off ramps onto my hand. Pinned for hours until my wife got home from shopping. Who knows how long I would have been there if she wasn't around. Fell off a roof once. Blew up something on the work bench and set myself on fire.. etc...
Sometimes 911 is just not possible to dial.

Some people like to live alone, some really need a whole team to keep an eye on them with 911 on speed dial, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

 

[Souschef]

After my wife passed away, I took to traveling to places she had no interest in going. I went to China, traveled the Trans Siberian Railroad, cruised the Inner Hebrides of Scotland and took the Chunnel from London to Paris.
At the end of that trip, I wrote," Well so ends a very exciting trip, but at this point my life is at a crossroads. I have no idea when my next trip is or where it will be to. Time will tell".
When I came back from my last trip in October, I said I had no idea where I would be going next, but I did not want to be traveling alone again.
Well, life is funny, because I met a lady who was also widowed. We were married on the Island of Santorini, and have just celebrated our 13th anniversary.

 

[Poopycat]

50 year old single lady here. For the most part, I have lived alone for the past 20+ years. I had a gentleman friend move in for about 6 months a few years back and while I thought I would enjoy having someone live with me, it basically got on my nerves. When he announced he was leaving, I feigned disappointment but was actually relieved. But if the right gentleman came along, I’d be willing to try it again. I just don’t think that’s likely at my age.

Like others who have posted, I like having the place to myself. I can choose when to get chores done. Or not. Because if it’s messy, who else but the cat will notice? I like choosing what I want for dinner and when I want it. No fighting over the remote. No need to be quiet so I don’t wake someone up.

I do wish I had someone around who could check in on me to make sure I’m not dead on the floor, with the cat chewing on my carcass, after I trip on her and hit my head on the corner of the counter. I really imagine that death-by-cat is a possibility. And I also hate asking people to take me to medical appointments or pick me up at the hospital. Makes me feel like a loser. I really wish there was a company that performed this service.

 

[tmm99]

I would hate to live alone in this pandemic. My DH is who keeps me sane.

I lived alone for 20 years, but my w*rk kept me busy. I don't think I'd want to live alone now, even if the pandemic was over.

 

[skipro33]

Yes, some people do need adult supervision.

And in my case constant adult supervision.

 

[MarieIG]

Some people like to live alone, some really need a whole team to keep an eye on them with 911 on speed dial, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

I suspect that Mrs. Skipro is going to have to ensure her estate plan makes arrangements for a guardian . . .

 

[street]

I've never really lived alone. There was one month when I moved for work before DH and DS could join me. Unfortunately, I had virtually no furniture, no television set, and, for that month, no computer or internet. And I really liked it.

But would I want to live alone full time? No. We're easygoing with one another, so there is little pressure to conform to one another. DH and I both like podcasts and audio stuff, and the house is big enough that we often spend the day in our own worlds, which is nice.

That is very true in our lives also. I do my thing and gone a lot in the outdoors and she does her things she does. She likes her alone time and her things she like to do and our interests are so far apart but things work soo well that way for us. And when together at home we still have all the space we need to be together or not.

 

[MRG]

I lived with a couple roommates for a year and by myself for a while.

The one roommate, who owned the house, was a functional alcoholic. He had big eyes and he frequently passed out drunk in the living room, snoring with his big eyes wide open. Despite his loud snoring I always thought he was dead. Past that he was a really good guy who would help anyone. I remember thinking someone was trying to take advantage of him while he was intoxicated. That lead me and another guy chasing him around downtown KCMO, ending up in gay bar. After a few of these adventures I thought I'd be safer on my own..

Living on my own was a lot better albeit more boring. I enjoyed it immensely doing things my way.

I cherished company when I traveled for work. Strange cities, weird POed clients, strange foods were better with most of my companions. I traveled longer term with a couple people; one guy I spent a continuous 6 weeks with, I wanted to throw out the window the first week. Another coworker I spent 3 weeks with and genuinely enjoyed his company.

 

[skipro33]

I suspect that Mrs. Skipro is going to have to ensure her estate plan makes arrangements for a guardian . . .

Mrs Pro does make me sign out when I go outside. Especially if it involves power tools. Today I decided was a good day to work on fire breaks, cutting down and setting up burn piles. She just shook her head, clipped a phone to my chest and said she was leaving for 3 or 4 hours to get her nails done.
I'm beginning to think she makes me sign out with her so she can find the body, not save me from harm.

 

[Amethyst]

In my 20's, I had a series of apartment-mates. The first was a woman I liked a lot. She left to get married, and was followed by a series of unfortunate events, both male and female. They all played dominance games - like the woman whose obnoxious boy friend had his own key and practically lived there while paying nothing. The male apartment mate who made a move on me, then got hostile when I told him NO. And on and on.

I investigated sharing a town house with two other women who worked for the same company. Boy, would that have been a disaster. I decided against it when one of the others made some comment about taking turns using our hair dryers so we didn't cause a short. Good grief.

Marriage to someone I love is great; but if that's gone, I am not suited to sharing ever again.

 

[Jerry1]

I was married at 20 without ever having lived on my own and I’ve now been married for 40 years. So, I’ve never ever lived on my own. Sometimes I think it would be great but then I’m reminded of the married vs single debate. Seems that there’s always single people who want to be married and married people who want to be single. I can only assume that there are people who live alone that want to live with someone and those that live with someone who want to live alone.

It reminds me of the advice that goes something like, you better love yourself because that’s the person you’ll always be with. I think I’m meant to be with someone but I also think I’d be happy living alone because I’m generally a happy person. I’m not an over the top positive, passionate, excited person, but I’m always pretty happy. I think if DW passes before me, I’ll probably try to pair up with someone but I suspect it will be weird after living with the same person over 40 years. I’d probably get a condo/house with two master suites as I don’t envision sharing a bedroom with anyone other than DW. Of course that excludes certain visitation time that I hope I’ll always be able to enjoy with someone.

 

[W2R]

Folks living alone need to get one of those "buttons" you push when you've "fallen and you can't get up." Our neighbor had one of those AND a Jitterbug phone she wore on a lanyard. Of course, when she needed help, she called US, but YMMV.

I did a similar thing.

After my knee replacement surgery, I modified a small phone sized quilted bag (Vera Bradley, gals). I sewed a cord on it. Then I could put the cord around my neck with one arm through it too, so it wouldn't go flying if I fell. I put my phone and reading glasses in the bag. That way if I fell I could call Frank, who lives next door to me.

He spent a lot of time over here and was a wonderful help to me during those first few days when I felt a bit rocky. With the quilted bag and phone arrangement, he didn't have to worry about me in the evenings when he went home. I never did fall, but the bag kept us from worrying about it too much.

 

[irishgal]

Have lived alone for 15 years and I just find it less stressful. No worrying about expectations the other person has, or dealing with criticism from someone else.

Cons: if I got really sick there would be no one to get the dogs exercised.

 

[Koolau]

Married 50 years and still think it was the right move - for me. We offer each other a lot of freedom and agree on most things. So, it's sort of the best of both worlds. Having said that, I don't know if I'd "tempt fate" if I ever found myself single. One good marriage is more than most of us get. I've had (am having) mine! YMMV

 

[Marita40]

Originally posted by Poopycat:

I do wish I had someone around who could check in on me to make sure I’m not dead on the floor, with the cat chewing on my carcass, after I trip on her and hit my head on the corner of the counter. I really imagine that death-by-cat is a possibility. And I also hate asking people to take me to medical appointments or pick me up at the hospital. Makes me feel like a loser. I really wish there was a company that performed this service.

Love this. Yes, "death by cat" often crosses my mind. Why do they insist on winding around legs to trip us? As to the latter part of your quote, I can relate to this. Although I have friends to ask, it is somehow hard to do so. When I had a surgery two years ago and needed someone to transport me and stay with me for the first couple days, I did find that there were several agencies in the area that provided that service so I hired someone and would do it again if needed. Look for home health care services. Although I would love to live in the boonies, one reason I will stay in a city as a senior is because of such services.

 

[Major Tom]

I agree with W2R's long list of things she can do without having to check with anyone. I haven't lived with anyone in 27 years, and would have to be more than wildly besotted with someone at this point, for my living solo status to change. I mean, I'd have to be completely head-over-heels koo koo about someone, and they'd have to feel the same way about me. Just the thought of that happening to a stubborn old codger like me is chuckle-worthy!

Irishgal's comment made sense too. I can't really imagine having to be subjected to someone else's expectations. Likewise, I'd hate to be the cause of another person's disappointment when they find out what I'm really like. A family member has broached the subject of us living together at some point in the future. I have told her emphatically, that she has no idea how deathly dull I would be to live with. She countered with protestations of her equally deep unsuitably as a housemate, but I truly think she has no idea. Ha! On the other hand, my cat thinks I'm the perfect companion.

At least - I think she does. We spent 3 days in my campervan recently. Every time the little house on wheels became mobile, I definitely wasn't her favorite person.

 

[Amethyst]

Ha! Before meeting Mr. A., I had a "serious" relationship with someone, who abruptly broke it off with me. He informed me that the problem was him, not me - which I assumed was the old brush-off line, since from my perspective we'd been pretty compatible. Well, looking back and knowing what I know now, he was being sincere! It would have been a biiiig mistake to get hitched to him. He is now separated from the mother of his kids, because she wouldn't put up with certain shenanigans that I never could have predicted.

I agree with W2R's long list of things she can do without having to check with anyone. I haven't lived with anyone in 27 years, and would have to be more than wildly besotted with someone at this point, for my living solo status to change. I mean, I'd have to be completely head-over-heels koo koo about someone, and they'd have to feel the same way about me. Just the thought of that happening to a stubborn old codger like me is chuckle-worthy!

Irishgal's comment made sense too. I can't really imagine having to be subjected to someone else's expectations. Likewise, I'd hate to be the cause of another person's disappointment when they find out what I'm really like. A family member has broached the subject of us living together at some point in the future. I have told her emphatically, that she has no idea how deathly dull I would be to live with. She countered with protestations of her equally deep unsuitably as a housemate, but I truly think she has no idea. Ha! On the other hand, my cat thinks I'm the perfect housemate.

At least - I think she does. We spent 3 days in my campervan recently. Every time the little house on wheels became mobile, I definitely wasn't her favorite person.

 

[mystang52]

Folks living alone need to get one of those "buttons" you push when you've "fallen and you can't get up." Our neighbor had one of those AND a Jitterbug phone she wore on a lanyard. Of course, when she needed help, she called US, but YMMV.

As part of our SimpliSafe alarm system we have a "panic button" mounted on the lower end of our upstairs bedroom wall. Figured in event of a fall, and alone, it might be difficult to get to phone or get down the stairs.
I have a multi-page document for DW covering everything she would need to know if I precdecease her. That includes getting one of those "I've fallen and I can't get up" alarms. I think this is a great idea for anyone living alone.

 

[ER Eddie]

On Shok's list, not having someone to take me home from procedures is an inconvenience. So far I've had friends who recognized my predicament and helped when asked, but I don't like to have to ask.

I also hate asking people to take me to medical appointments or pick me up at the hospital. Makes me feel like a loser. I really wish there was a company that performed this service.

Yeah, this is the only real downside to living alone, at least for me. What if I need to be transported to the hospital for a procedure? Who's going to take me? My dog can't drive very well. I have some people I could ask, but it feels awkward.

I can relate to this. Although I have friends to ask, it is somehow hard to do so. When I had a surgery two years ago and needed someone to transport me and stay with me for the first couple days, I did find that there were several agencies in the area that provided that service so I hired someone and would do it again if needed. Look for home health care services. Although I would love to live in the boonies, one reason I will stay in a city as a senior is because of such services.

I didn't realize some home health agencies offered that service. That's good.

I always wondered why someone didn't step into that market. An ever-increasing percentage of people live alone, so there must be millions of people who could benefit.

 

[Badger]

Once I found out my first wife of 10 years was unfaithful it only took 10 seconds to decide to end that marriage. A couple of months later I had to get away so I backpacked in the Smokies by myself. At one point on the hike I was ridge walking through a "tunnel" of Rhododendron flowers and no one to enjoy it with. It was beautiful and sad at the same time. It took about 3 years after the divorce to get comfortable with being single and willing to try dating. I was fortunate to have a dog at that time that was always happy to see me. I eventually met and married a wonderful lady 2 years later. We have been together now for 32 years. I can't and don't want to imagine being without her although eventually one of us will have to deal with it. If I'm lucky I will go first. She is better with having alone time and also has grown children to make life easier for her. Me not so much and no children of my own.


Cheers!

 

[Philliefan33]

Yeah, this is the only real downside to living alone, at least for me. What if I need to be transported to the hospital for a procedure? Who's going to take me? My dog can't drive very well. I have some people I could ask, but it feels awkward.







I didn't realize some home health agencies offered that service. That's good.



I always wondered why someone didn't step into that market. An ever-increasing percentage of people live alone, so there must be millions of people who could benefit.

I see an opportunity for “Uber med”.

 

[Dawg52]

I've lived alone for the last 40 years. Humans that is as I've had dogs over the last 20. No complaints whatsoever.