Do you listen to younger people?

[jollystomper]

We definitely listen to younger people. DW moreso than I, as she was a college professor and high school teacher, and has a great way of connecting with them than I do not. Almost every time we are out and about the community some young person or persons will come up to say hello and have a conversation with her.

In addition to our kids, we have about 20 nieces and nephews in the age 18-40 range that we try to keep in touch with. Nothing extensive, just an occasional "how are things going" line, acknowledging birthdays and wedding anniversaries, etc.

Even if one has different views, you can always learn from them. I try to be quick to listen and slow and thoughtful to respond. I avoid the back-in-my-day-things-were-done-this-way-and-were-so-much-better attitude. I notice when you avoid that, they naturally start asking questions about the past that you can share with them (both the good and the bad about the past).

 

[Lsbcal]

I try to be a better listener with our adult son. Very interesting view of the current work world although it's in a completely different field then the one I was in.

And I listen very carefully to our 2 year old grandson. He doesn't always make sense and is always jumping around like a high energy photon.

 

[pacergal]

I hope I listen to anyone, that's the caregiver in me!
But, yes, the younger generation is our future and I see so many of them well engaged and fighting to make that future worthwhile.
I enjoy being with younger generations. I learn so much.

 

[punkinhead]

I really enjoyed working with young engineers before I retired. There's nothing I hated more than to hear an older engineer say, "...because we've always done it that way". I was in machine design & robotics and I wanted every machine to be better than the last and loved incorporating new technology. Young engineers weren't afraid of change.

 

[Spock]

Well... the last college new hire at the "Big Blue Computer Company" I worked at brought his Dad along on the first day of work... and then we never saw him again. It wasn't a unique case... another employment hopeful brought their parents along for what was supposed to be a job interview.

Peter Lynch's kids are now a generation (or two) beyond todays youth... Lynch retired 33 years (a generation and a half!) ago...
My mid-twenties college educated nephews act like they are still pre-teens... playing with kids toys, running to "momma" for EVERYTHING including a tummy ache, "conversing" with them feels like humoring a 4 year old that just got a new dinosaur coloring book.
The mid-30's, now balding son of people we socialize with still lives at home, seemingly knows every scene from every Star Wars movie, but refuses to learn how to run a checkbook.

In the wider world, all I hear is "wipe out my student loans", "equity", "but climate change!", pronouns, and "OK Boomer".

I'm not looking forward to those generations curating SS (much less contributing to it) or staffing my future assisted living facility.
Now get off my lawn!

 

[ShokWaveRider]

As long as they can articulate the English language and communicate without saying "Like" "Um" and "Eh" every other word. Oh! wait, the same goes for adults too.

 

[Retch The Grate]

I don't feel particularly old (just turned 51 last month, so... yeah...), but I've noticed I'm definitely the voice of wisdom and experience at work these days. I listen my younger coworkers, but there's a lot more tendency than a decade ago to tell "back in the day" or give advice in a way where I'm speaking from a lot more experience than them.

As far as facial tattoos, people get them because they like them. Means absolutely nothing about the person, you won't be able to generalize about who has them or why. Folks personal reaction to them says a lot about them however.

 

[marko]

Most people in our new neighborhood are under 35.

This is a high end gated community with $1MM homes and professional young couples.

We find that they tend to have unrealistically high expectations, very impatient, with a touch of constantly being worried about getting screwed. Super competitive too.

We're all on a private chat and today's catastrophic outrage: rusty water which replaced yesterday's tragic outrage: a coyote sighting, which replaced the day's before sleepless night: an unidentified car driving down the street.

After a chat, we usually just walk away and, once out of earshot, say " they're young, they'll get over it". Everyone is nice enough but OMG, we almost get the sense that they're a different species.

 

[audreyh1]

Facial tattoos - I think of those fierce Māori warriors who also stick their tongues way out to intimidate the enemy.

 

[Koolau]

Most people in our new neighborhood are under 35.

This is a high end gated community with $1MM homes and professional young couples.

We find that they tend to have unrealistically high expectations, very impatient, with a touch of constantly being worried about getting screwed. Super competitive too.

We're all on a private chat and today's catastrophic outrage: rusty water which replaced yesterday's tragic outrage: a coyote sighting, which replaced the day's before sleepless night: an unidentified car driving down the street.

After a chat, we usually just walk away and, once out of earshot, say " they're young, they'll get over it". Everyone is nice enough but OMG, we almost get the sense that they're a different species.

I'm sure they all got a first place trophy for everything when they were in grade school.

 

[Koolau]

Facial tattoos - I think of those fierce Māori warriors who also stick their tongues way out to intimidate the enemy.

Heh, heh, it w*rks really well in a 30th floor board-room during the annual executive meeting.

 

[marko]

Heh, heh, it w*rks really well in a 30th floor board-room during the annual executive meeting.

+1. Like the clothing one wears, I believe it demonstrates a certain personality type or class designation.

True, you can't judge a book by its cover, but right or wrong, people do 100 times a day, whether for a job interview, meeting your girlfriend's parents or daily commerce.

I had a car salesman once and I noticed he had an obscenity tattooed across his knuckles. Kind of killed my enthusiasm.

 

[cyber888]

If the young ones have something that makes a lot of sense - of course I listen to them. You usually spot the intelligent ones when they speak, and there's the ones that just stares at you and does not know much because they feel so entitled.
As a teacher, I had a student who got Zeros because she did not submit any lab work and any assignments, never read the syllabus, then as the midterm was over and she got an "F".
She spoke and said "I thought if I came to class, I'd get an "A", that's why I never submitted any assignments."
My answer was "Well, you can come to class, fidget with your iPhone the entire hour, and that does not equate to being present. And if you read the syllabus, you'd see that the assignments make up most of your grades, not attendance."
It's a pity, but there are some young people like this.

 

[Gumby]

There is little new under the sun. Over thirty-two years ago, when I was in law school, one of my classmates never came to a single class after the first year. In fact, he lived and worked in Chicago ,and he would only fly in to New Haven to take the final exams, which were the sole grades we got for any of the courses. He got the same JD I did, with far less effort.

 

[Katsmeow]

There is little new under the sun. Over thirty-two years ago, when I was in law school, one of my classmates never came to a single class after the first year. In fact, he lived and worked in Chicago ,and he would only fly in to New Haven to take the final exams, which were the sole grades we got for any of the courses. He got the same JD I did, with far less effort.

I confess I mostly did this as well. I mean I didn't live elsewhere, but I didn't go to classes after the first year unless the professor was interesting and I was learning stuff. So, I went to Charles Alan Wright's Federal Courts class every time, but I went to only the first one or two classes of my income tax course.

And, yes, this made logical sense. Your grade was what you made on the final exam just as you mention. So coming to class, being active and participating did not help your grade at all. Further your professor did not know whose bluebook they were grading. So they couldn't even give you extra points for what you did in class even if they wanted to. I saw no reason to go to glasses where I felt I would get no value from the classroom discussion. I did go to the few classes where I did think I would get value.

I remember when I took Wills and Estates (which I had zero interest in). So I went to the first class and never went back. Even better, the final exam was an open book 3 hours exam. (You could use anything to help you other than a live person). The professor's opinion was no one could look up all the answers in 3 hours. She was wrong. I mean, I didn't need to look up everything but I did check everything.

There was a long major section (maybe about a fourth of the exam) that was questions on the Rule Against Perpetuities. I found that topic extremely boring but I knew there had been a famous Harvard Law Review article called Perpetuities in a Nutshell. So I went to looked at it to see if it would help with the questions. Turns out the professor had taken all of her questions from examples in that article! So I answered that part in about 10 minutes which gave me plenty of time to verify everything else.

A friend of mine was worried that I would fail since I hadn't gone to class. She asked me if I had gotten my grade. I said I had but didn't say what I made. She told me her grade (a high B honor grade). Then she outright asked me what I made. She was very sore to find out I had made an A and the second highest grade in the class... (This was at a time when typically only 2 or maybe 3 people would make an A in a class).

One of my favorite law school memories....

 

[Koolau]

+1. Like the clothing one wears, I believe it demonstrates a certain personality type or class designation.

True, you can't judge a book by its cover, but right or wrong, people do 100 times a day, whether for a job interview, meeting your girlfriend's parents or daily commerce.

I had a car salesman once and I noticed he had an obscenity tattooed across his knuckles. Kind of killed my enthusiasm.

There are some things that folks can't change about themselves (immutable characteristics) that, if they even cross my mind, I kick myself. But what you wear, how you adorn your body, how you respect others by cleanliness and appropriate dress: I do not beat myself up for noticing. Nor will I allow anyone else to beat me up for noticing. I do my best to get past all that and try to assume the best of people.

 

[punkinhead]

Most people in our new neighborhood are under 35.

This is a high end gated community with $1MM homes and professional young couples.

We find that they tend to have unrealistically high expectations, very impatient, with a touch of constantly being worried about getting screwed. Super competitive too.

We're all on a private chat and today's catastrophic outrage: rusty water which replaced yesterday's tragic outrage: a coyote sighting, which replaced the day's before sleepless night: an unidentified car driving down the street.

After a chat, we usually just walk away and, once out of earshot, say " they're young, they'll get over it". Everyone is nice enough but OMG, we almost get the sense that they're a different species.

Our neighborhood has a Facebook group that my wife monitors. It gets all the same outrage but it's mostly from old people. Outrage and entitlement are not new to this generation. The difference is the older people are always sure to mention the color of the person driving that unidentified car.

 

[Andre1969]

I had a car salesman once and I noticed he had an obscenity tattooed across his knuckles. Kind of killed my enthusiasm.

This is petty I know, but back in 2012, when I bought my truck, the salesman, a young college-age guy, was wearing white athletic ankle socks with his black dress shoes.

I don't know why it caught my eye, or why I can still remember it 11 years later. But, he was wearing black shoes, black pants, and he was a dark skinned black guy, so I guess the contrast just stuck out.

Still, he was dressed better than I was, so I'm not gonna judge!

 

[Route246]

All good responses. I wasn't necessarily thinking of specifics, more like generalities is what I had in mind.

The most difficult part I find is to get them to trust you because you are old and they are not. There is a lot of insanity going on in the world these days, much of it created by "old" people so natural skepticism from young people is there.

I try to ask questions and then listen. Everyone's answer is a valid answer assuming they are altered, those answers give insight into how others think that may be different from mine. I value that greatly as I have made course adjustments late in my life that I wouldn't otherwise make.

At work last week we have a S/W bug system that I have spent years trying to master and optimize my use with. I thought I had some things dialed in but mentioned that I spend so much time doing a specific task. A younger colleague asked me why I was doing something a certain way and I explained it was to optimize lookups and summaries. He told me that is really fine and good but do you realize that you are circumventing how the real optimization works? "Please tell me," I told him. He gave a short explanation which is really very counter-intuitive and my first thought is skepticism. He told me I could continue to suffer or try what he suggested. I tried it, destroying some of the structure I had created but he was absolutely right. I tried to pass this on to some "older" colleagues and they looked at me like I was crazy for telling them how to do something that they had mastered after 15 years, blah blah blah.

This sort of attitude is what I vowed when I was younger that I would do everything in my power to not be that guy. I'm trying but not always successful.

 

[Gumby]

I've mentioned before that the two worst reasons to choose a course of action are: 1) "we've always done it that way"; and 2) "we've never done it that way." Rather, we should strive to look at each situation anew and do what is best suited to accomplish the task. Maybe it will be to continue doing what has or has not been done, but maybe there is a better way now. Young people, who don't have the burden of history, are probably best suited to figure out something "new". I try hard to keep my mind open to these new things, but like most, my view is almost always going to be colored by my experience.

 

[MarieIG]

Well yes.

My door was (almost) always open at work, and they would wander in with questions or complaints - mostly business, sometimes personal. I helped them with handling assignments, taught them how to turn a file, guided them with research, occasionally reviewed work, gave them advise with problematic clients, co-workers, and adversaries, etc.

They helped me with technology and would keep me updated as to new developments, to the extent that I might not have learned them elsewhere.

If someone showed intuitive, demonstrated effort or got good results, I applauded that - and ask an open-ended question about the result which would allow them to expound on the achievement if they wished.

Now one of my (former) office babies called me today. She no longer needs my guidance on a professional level, although we sometimes shoot the breeze about it, but she has become a very close friend.

 

[Music Lover]

As far as facial tattoos, people get them because they like them. Means absolutely nothing about the person, you won't be able to generalize about who has them or why. Folks personal reaction to them says a lot about them however.

How can the decision to put a permanent tattoo on your face mean absolutely nothing? A tattoo is a statement and the choice of getting one and where you put it says something about that person. A face tattoo is on display for everyone to see, to expect people not to make judgments about it is complete foolishness.

 

[Koolau]

How can the decision to put a permanent tattoo on your face mean absolutely nothing? A tattoo is a statement and the choice of getting one and where you put it says something about that person. A face tattoo is on display for everyone to see, to expect people not to make judgments about it is complete foolishness.

Yeah, it almost becomes a "dare." I "dare" you to notice my facial tattoo. If you notice it, then your opinion of me is "bad" or "evil" or "prejudiced", "etc."

Sorry. I'm not playing that game. Do what you want, but don't expect me not to notice. Don't expect me to put my "Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval" on it. Get off my lawn!

 

[Lsbcal]

I haven't seen many face tattoos around our city. Mostly all over the rest of the body. One sees young people parading around in cold weather with their skin bared so we can all get a good look. Humans are weird.

 

[Ronstar]

Sure I listen to younger people. I always learn something from them, even if some are tattooed and pierced.