Prepaid Funerals

[Scuba]

I've met with a Neptune Society rep x 2 and am seriously thinking this may be the way for me. Does anyone have any experience with a relative who passed with a Neptune Society plan in place? Any regrets?

My sister passed away and had the Neptune Society plan in place. It was wonderful and based on my experience as her executor I would use them myself.

 

[athena53]

Also Costco sells caskets and urns.

Now there's an area where I did not "Think Costco First"! I just checked and their urns are $90 compared to the $65 ones offered by the local funeral home. A few of Costco's, though, come with matching mini-urns which were $35 at the funeral home.

Preplanned is good, I think. So many problems with unplanned. Grief. Panic. Coroner and cops milling around, demanding you make plan "now" for burial or cremation. No one is allowed to recommend any good inexpensive funeral homes, etc. Pressure. Pressure. You're looking through yellow pages, no one answers the phone at the funeral homes, but you can leave a message.

Last year both my mother and DH were dying of inoperable cancer and receiving palliative care. Mom died first so I waited till we were back from the road trip to Mom's funeral before visiting our local funeral home and prepaying for DH's cremation. The wait was because I had no idea what would happen if he died while we were on the road 1,000 miles away from home. He died a month later and it was a real blessing to be able to hand the funeral home's card over to the hospice social worker, who took care of it from there. No cops, no coroner. If I have the luxury of advance notice that I'm near the end I'll do the same thing.

 

[Dash man]

I've met with a Neptune Society rep x 2 and am seriously thinking this may be the way for me. Does anyone have any experience with a relative who passed with a Neptune Society plan in place? Any regrets?

My mother used the Neptune Society. I was four hours away when I was notified of her death. By the time I got to the hospital they had already taken her away and I never got to say goodbye. It's what she wanted, to not burden us. But funerals are for the living to say goodbye. I missed that and hated not having the chance.

 

[Idnar7]

If I recall correctly, when cremations first became available, no funeral homes were involved. Catholic churches wouldn't allow there to be services in churches. Bodies were cremated within 24 hours of passing. Then funeral homes and churches realized they were passing up money. Now services are common as "memorials" after the fact. The urn is on display at the memorial. I was at one recently where there was an open casket visitation (embalmed) and then later a cremation. Both my in-laws had Neptune plans and there were no issues. Both had memorial services and the ashes were scattered by family per their wishes. It seems like the funeral homes put a lot of pressure on to have memorials with luncheons etc at a significant additional cost. I signed up for cremation years ago but didn't prepay. The prepay amount has increased twice in that time. I jokingly tell my wife if I outlive her, I will scatter her ashes at Talbotts.

 

[Investornew]

I have done some research on prepaid funerals and read that you can lose any funds that you don't use towards the funeral; and that they aren't such a great deal overall. I recently had a negative experience with someone trying to sell me a pre-paid funeral plan and he told me it would cost "80,000 dollars". I know there is no such thing as a funeral that costs that much but he insisted that's what it could cost years from now, and that I should start paying on it now. Always be careful who you are dealing with. He asked how old my dad was, too. That was creepy. He was also preying on my grief as my mother had passed recently. And he acted as though he expected me to write him a check for 80,000 dollars.

Would life insurance money cover some funeral costs, or a burial policy? In my own family, we've decided not to do prepaid funerals. That's just my two cents. I think Costco sells burial caskets. We will make do however we can if and when that time arises. We buried my mom recently and there were no issues.

As with weddings, there is always a cheaper alternative and less expensive way of doing things.

 

[Investornew]

Where are these $500 cremations one hears about?

Someone I know who was indigent, was cremated and her family didn't have money for a funeral, burial or anything else. They agreed to mail her ashes to the family for a small fee, around $50 or so, I believe. The price changes suddenly when the person has no money.

 

[Sanstar]

My sister passed away and had the Neptune Society plan in place. It was wonderful and based on my experience as her executor I would use them myself.

Thank you, Scuba.

 

[Sanstar]

My mother used the Neptune Society. I was four hours away when I was notified of her death. By the time I got to the hospital they had already taken her away and I never got to say goodbye. It's what she wanted, to not burden us. But funerals are for the living to say goodbye. I missed that and hated not having the chance.

Thank you, Dash man. I wouldn't have thought of this.

 

[aja8888]

Where are these $500 cremations one hears about?

Houston....

Ex-wife's was $865.00 total including picking up the body at the morgue, death certificate, and delivery (to DD) of the urn with ashes.

Neighbor's dad passed two years ago and he got the same deal at a different place for $500.

 

[Scuba]

Thank you, Dash man. I wouldn't have thought of this.

I didn't think of this either because we still had a memorial service for my sister where we scattered her ashes so family and friends did feel they were able to say goodbye. For me, viewing the body of a person who has died is not necessary or even desirable. I'd rather remember the person as they were when they were alive. YMMV

 

[Brat]

In the west there are pioneer cemeteries now under the care of the counties. A sorority sister of mine found a spot for her urn in one in Portland for a token sum. When my husband's aunt passed he discovered that the family had burial spots in rural Kansas. I think they donated those they couldn't use to a church in the community.

 

[meierlde]

Actually everywhere in the US there are abandoned cemeteries that are left to the county to mow. I know of one in southern IN for example. Let alone talk about small family plots that may or may not exist on any piece of property.

 

[Dash man]

Actually everywhere in the US there are abandoned cemeteries that are left to the county to mow. I know of one in southern IN for example. Let alone talk about small family plots that may or may not exist on any piece of property.

That's why I'll use my veterans benefit to be buried at a national cemetery. They're well cared for and DW can join me in the same piece of ground. Haven't decided on a casket or cremation yet.

 

[Brat]

Several years ago I did an HR audit of a Hines Nurseries. They were buying up many small growers and often discovered family plots on the property.

 

[brett]

Both of my parents had prepaid funerals with all details selected and paid. Their wish was for very basic funerals, cremation.

The only item we had to decide was the style of thank you card. The funeral home folks did try to upsell us to expensive coffins which we declned. Their wishes were quite specific.

We will do the same. As an executor, I thank my parents for having wills in place that made the process straightforward for us.

We plan to do the same for our children.

 

[Dawg52]

My plan is to have a prepaid funeral arrangement for myself. I've always been an independent type of person and guess even when kicking the bucket, that's no exception. Plus, by planning ahead, I have more of a say as to what type of arrangements I want.

I will do the same one day. It's just me so I would rather take care of it rather than leaving it up to my nephews. It will make it easier on them and I will get something better than a pine box. Not that it matters at that point. Ha.

 

[growing_older]

I'm going the pre-planned route as well. It's not to try to save money on the funeral expenses, although I'm planning modestly. It's to ease the burden on surviving children, who can avoid having to make a lot of unpleasant decisions because I will have already made choices.

 

[Dash man]

Has anyone done pre-planning with a funeral home for burial in a national veteran's cemetery? I know the cemetery doesn't allow pre-planned selection of plots, but just wondering how a funeral home would handle it.

 

[misanman]

MIL died about 15 years after FIL. When MIL passed away we went to the funeral home with FIL's contract in hand to use as a guide. We were surprised that the fees had gone down significantly over the 15 years. Made me question whether prepaid made sense.

 

[brett]

Have not done ours yet.

But mine will be very straightforward. Throw what is left of me in a cardboard box and chuck it in an incinerator. No fancy coffin, no limos, flowers, receptions. Don't believe in it. No funeral home urn either. Scatter the ashes.
End of.

 

[MichaelB]

Has anyone done pre-planning with a funeral home for burial in a national veteran's cemetery? I know the cemetery doesn't allow pre-planned selection of plots, but just wondering how a funeral home would handle it.

It's a smart idea to set this up in advance, because it is a bit involved. The best thing would be to look for a local funeral home that has experience with burials at veteran cemeteries and get all the paperwork out of the way. Discharge papers or other proof of veteran status is needed. You can choose a cemetery now but it may be closed when your time comes, so the funeral home should also have experience transporting the remains out of state.

DF wanted to be buried at a veterans cemetery but only shared that with DM, and when he passed away unexpectedly, no one knew, so he was buried in a local church cemetery. DM asked me to look into relocating his remains, which may not happen due to excessive paperwork and cost.

 

[Blue Collar Guy]

Preplanned is good, I think. So many problems with unplanned. Grief. Panic. Coroner and cops milling around, demanding you make plan "now" for burial or cremation. No one is allowed to recommend any good inexpensive funeral homes, etc. Pressure. Pressure. You're looking through yellow pages, no one answers the phone at the funeral homes, but you can leave a message. Then you find out cremation will cost $3,500. What? That's inexpensive? And the funeral home contract states they will charge you $2,000 to transfer the body to another funeral home. It's all a huge ripoff for the unplanned situations. You find out later you could have had a preplanned cremation for $1,900 at a different funeral home. But $1,900 is way too much also. So weird. Profits must be enormous. Where are these $500 cremations one hears about?

So, my wife's dead broke uncle who is living with my mother in law is going to die one day., He has 5 children from 2 different wives. They dont speak with him now, imagine if i called them and said to kick in 1500 each to bury him hahahah. I priced out cremations. It was $1740 the cheapest. Guess my mother in law needs to save that up. He has said in the past he wanted to go with his parents. I told him you better start savin up , cause just to open the plot and the casket are a few grand.

 

[Blue Collar Guy]

My plan is to have a prepaid funeral arrangement for myself. I've always been an independent type of person and guess even when kicking the bucket, that's no exception. Plus, by planning ahead, I have more of a say as to what type of arrangements I want.

You better do it now, tomorrow is promised to no one.

 

[Teacher Terry]

I was the guardian for my good friend that was in a home and her DH was in a veterans cemetery. WE were allowed to prepay the funeral and she was on Medicaid. It was not complicated at all. When she died we called the home and they handled everything. They even would have taken her ashes to the cemetery but we wanted too.

 

[Blue Collar Guy]

I already posted my true thoughts on the matter, but on the lighter side-----I kid my wife that i want a horse drawn carriage carrying my coffin, slowly going down 5th avenue during rush hour. I want professional mourners, and if available a flyover with a missing man formation. Id like several bagpipers to play some tear jerking songs. And if finances allow the Celtic women singing Ave Maria. Her response was , "Sure, anything you want honey".