Are we creating "weak men"?

[Scuba]

Questions like this make me feel like an old fogey. Sometimes I do think our society is going to hell in a handbasket - addiction is spiraling out of control, everyone seems to think they’re a victim and entitled to compensation from others because of their perceived “victimhood,” people would rather collect taxpayer-funded handouts than work, and as a society we have moved to prioritizing rights of those on the fringes (transgender, homeless, etc) over the mainstream. And the music these days!

Then I remember that our parents probably thought the same about our generation. And apparently even Socrates saw it as a problem. I mentor university students and when I see their drive and motivation, I feel much better!

 

[ncbill]

I do my part. Roomie is a veterinarian with many skills and schooling, but mechanically inexperienced. I assisted him through a brake job on his Subaru, and will also do so with his motorhome. He did well and only donated a little bit of flesh and blood.
Every chance I get I pass down the old ways. From how to pack grease bearings or drive out a pilot bearing, to applying leverage and being aware of stored energy, if someone is willing to learn I am patient.
I had a young apprentice operator that had a couple of mishaps. Our boss was wanting to can him and I said we all have to start somewhere, and he is here every day on time with a good attitude.
When it was all said and done the boss said I had it right.

Ugh...that's what I hate...."zero-tolerance" in today's society.

No wonder people do their best to cover up mistakes given most employers are now willing to crucify them over the least little mistake, even if they own up to it.

 

[ncbill]

having no children I have no skin in the game. I left home at 17 and never looked back. It seems that my friends with offspring are much more tolerant of their childrens lack of direction than I would ever be.

Bet you could say the same of those college kids heading off to Woodstock.

Most of them seem to have turned out alright.

Though to be fair, as for lack of direction, our kids all knew early on that after high school they'd either be heading off to college or I'd drop them off at the mall...at the (combined) U.S. Armed Forces Recruiting Center.

 

[Irishgirlyc58]

Ugh...that's what I hate...."zero-tolerance" in today's society.

No wonder people do their best to cover up mistakes given most employers are now willing to crucify them over the least little mistake, even if they own up to it.

I told one of my board members that if we fire everyone who makes a mistake we won’t have anyone working for us.

People make mistakes. Everyone. Some of us admit it. Others play the blame game.

 

[DawgSavr]

Just speaking from personal acquaintances, at least some of this problem is picking the wrong field of study. Colleges will gladly take your money to teach you what interests you, you can probably tell where this leads from here...

My son graduated from high school, National Honor Society, 4-Year Letterman in Cross Country, Track and Field. He was accepted as a freshman to the University of Missouri - School of Journalism in which only 40% of incoming freshman are. He graduated in 4 years with a degree from the School of Journalism in Strategic Communications - Cum Laude. He focused on his schooling and worked part time at his uncle's cabinet/remodeling shop to make money for school and gas for his truck during summers and holiday breaks. He graduated at 22 years old in 2016...flash forward 5 years ... he has been unable to land a job in his field of study...has worked two jobs...Trip Insurance Claims Examiner and Office Administration (Accts Payable) in a small Lumber Company while working a side-gig during nights and weekends selling Running Shoes at a small Running Sports Store. Both full time jobs were dead ends ... We all know what happen to the travel industry during the pandemic so trip insurance dried up so he resigned to take the job with the small lumber company which was hot during the pandemic, however after a year they decided they needed a CPA to do their account work and let him go. He is now looking for his next gig while putting in more hours at the Running Sports Store. He lives at home, roof over his head, food on the table and he takes care of all of his expenses. He has put away ~$150K in savings, brokerage, roth and traditional since he started working his first real job at 15. We hardly ever see him, between working and his girlfriend (who is an elementary school teacher)...you may say, he sounds like he is doing well...however, at 27 years old, he does not know what he wants to do with his life and honestly, the once energetic, confident, strong kid that I knew is showing nothing but stress and anxiousness. He is an avid runner, which helps him deal with the stress, however, his motivation to work seems to be fading due to the experiences he has encountered already in his short career. I want to put the hammer down and tell him he's got to move out in a year ... but honestly afraid of what that would do to him ... like kicking the dog when he's already down, so to speak, I don't want to push him over the edge. Anyone else experience this with their kid(s)? What did you do that helped?

 

[EastWest Gal]

Our situation as well. I don’t mind having him around though. The GF he had in high school is in the same boat as well. No idea what to do. It seems more difficult for certain professions to have jobs available for the graduates. Then they have trouble getting work in their field a few years later because they couldn’t find a job right out of college. It’s a vicious cycle.

I guess be grateful he’s saving and investing? DS has a NW approaching $100K working part time.

Part of me wonders if it’s the efficiencies of the internet and automation. Maybe we don’t all need to be out wasting fossil fuel on commuting and working full time for 40 years. I worked 10-12 hr days and felt burned out much of my career. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.

 

[Mr._Graybeard]

My son graduated from high school, National Honor Society, 4-Year Letterman in Cross Country, Track and Field. He was accepted as a freshman to the University of Missouri - School of Journalism in which only 40% of incoming freshman are. He graduated in 4 years with a degree from the School of Journalism in Strategic Communications - Cum Laude. He focused on his schooling and worked part time at his uncle's cabinet/remodeling shop to make money for school and gas for his truck during summers and holiday breaks. He graduated at 22 years old in 2016...flash forward 5 years ... he has been unable to land a job in his field of study...

I'm a Missouri J-school alum, MA class of 1981. Getting a start in the field has been challenging in the past but is particularly difficult now. Networking is crucial to get that first step up the ladder.

Did your son have a favorite instructor at Mizzou? Faculty members there generally have a lot of connections with people in the field and can be very helpful as a networking base.

He might want to explore doing some freelance work. Magazines rely heavily on outside contributions for content. The trade press in particular could be a rewarding outlet.

I'd be happy to offer some other suggestions via PM.

 

[Sniggle]

My son graduated from high school, National Honor Society, 4-Year Letterman in Cross Country, Track and Field. He was accepted as a freshman to the University of Missouri - School of Journalism in which only 40% of incoming freshman are. He graduated in 4 years with a degree from the School of Journalism in Strategic Communications - Cum Laude. He focused on his schooling and worked part time at his uncle's cabinet/remodeling shop to make money for school and gas for his truck during summers and holiday breaks. He graduated at 22 years old in 2016...flash forward 5 years ... he has been unable to land a job in his field of study...has worked two jobs...Trip Insurance Claims Examiner and Office Administration (Accts Payable) in a small Lumber Company while working a side-gig during nights and weekends selling Running Shoes at a small Running Sports Store. Both full time jobs were dead ends ... We all know what happen to the travel industry during the pandemic so trip insurance dried up so he resigned to take the job with the small lumber company which was hot during the pandemic, however after a year they decided they needed a CPA to do their account work and let him go. He is now looking for his next gig while putting in more hours at the Running Sports Store. He lives at home, roof over his head, food on the table and he takes care of all of his expenses. He has put away ~$150K in savings, brokerage, roth and traditional since he started working his first real job at 15. We hardly ever see him, between working and his girlfriend (who is an elementary school teacher)...you may say, he sounds like he is doing well...however, at 27 years old, he does not know what he wants to do with his life and honestly, the once energetic, confident, strong kid that I knew is showing nothing but stress and anxiousness. He is an avid runner, which helps him deal with the stress, however, his motivation to work seems to be fading due to the experiences he has encountered already in his short career. I want to put the hammer down and tell him he's got to move out in a year ... but honestly afraid of what that would do to him ... like kicking the dog when he's already down, so to speak, I don't want to push him over the edge. Anyone else experience this with their kid(s)? What did you do that helped?

Has he looked at the military? PA officer would fit well with his degree.

https://www.goarmy.com/careers-and-...anguages-code/46a-public-affairs-officer.html

 

[DawgSavr]

Mr._Greybeard, thank you for your offer for additional suggestions for my son through PM. I attempted to send you a private message through the forum, unfortunately received an error indicating since I am a "new" member, I am not "trusted" to use this feature yet. So not sure what it takes to become a "trusted" member? Perhaps you can send me a private message by right clicking on my forum name. Appreciate your insight, suggestions and experience. Thanks again for your offer!

 

[DawgSavr]

Thank you Sniggle. I have passed this information to him for consideration. I have had buddies of mine that have done this (albeit, 30+ years ago), and have built very successful careers within the military and in civilian jobs.

36 years ago when I graduated high school, my parents could not afford to send me to college as I was the first of 4 sibblings and money was tight in the 70's and early 80's as many of us can recall. In fact, my parents lost their home due to the unaffordably high mortgage rates. I had 2 choices, go to school with scholarships & pell grants w/work study or join the military. My dad was Army and honestly thought of going that route, however, I had some athletic ability with baseball, went to a small Juco to play on scholarship, pell grant and work study. Kept my grades up and did very well with baseball to where I had many choices to play at the University level. I chose to play at the University of Georgia. I was fortunate to have my college supplemented with athletic scholarships and grants and a bit of savings from work study/odd jobs. Playing sports in college was a full time job so working was not so much an option when I went to UGA. I received a BBA emphasis in Finance and post college $500 a month playing low minor league baseball wasn't going to pay the bills so I hung up the spikes, married my high school sweetheart started my career making minimum wage as a Teller. Fast forward, I like to tell my son to work hard and enjoy the journey because they are different for everyone ... but that's dad talking. What does he know !

Thanks for your recommendation! Very much appreciated! Best to you.

 

[Amethyst]

G2/J2, as well.

Has he looked at the military? PA officer would fit well with his degree.

https://www.goarmy.com/careers-and-...anguages-code/46a-public-affairs-officer.html